In a recent “Kindle Singles” interview with David Blum, President Obama was asked whether or not there were things he yearned for but couldn’t afford when growing up. He pointed out how the American Dream has changed since then from “an education, a steady job, a home, and family” and went on to say:

“There was not that window into the lifestyles of the rich and famous,” the President said. “Kids weren’t monitoring every day what Kim Kardashian was wearing, or where Kanye West was going on vacation, and thinking that somehow that was the mark of success.”

O. M. F. G. YOU. DID. NOT. JUST. SAY. THAT., PRESIDENT. OBAMA. Ugh. I feel so bad for kids who grew up whenever Obama grew up. Seems so gross. What did they even look at on their phones? Just the stuff their own friends were doing, or like, just games and stuff? Ew. Anyway, Kris Jenner, mother of Kim Kardashian, has her own television show now and responded to President Obama on that television show. YOU CAN’T JUST SAY WHAT YOU WANT AND NOT GET RESPONDED AT, PRESIDENT OBAMA!

Just to get the ball rolling, I’ve drafted an apology for President Obama:

“My Fellow Americans,

Being President means being able to admit when you’re wrong. Now, some of you might have heard some of the things I said about Kim Kardashian and Kanye West in that interview with the Kindle thing. [Pause for boos.] I know, I know. Let me start off by saying that Kanye West, first of all, doesn’t go on vacation ever. I know that now. But I’d like to reserve my biggest apology for Kim Kardashian, truly — and I checked! — the world’s hardest-working female. She never sleeps! [Pause for applause.] She never sleeps! [Not a mistake -- repeated for effect.] The Kardashians have famously worked hard for everything they’ve gotten, and have steered a generation of children in what can only be described as the right direction — I’m not even sure what my angle was in pretending otherwise. I was so stupid. I can’t believe I said those stupid other things. I don’t even know what I was thinking. Ugh. Stupid stupid stupid STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID. I’m sorry.”

Luckily, we are a forgiving nation. (Via Dlisted.)

Comments (28)
  1. “The moral of the story is it’s never too late to prove yourself as a winner” – Kris Jenner on Breaking Bad

  2. Kris is doing really well for herself, considering she started out in the 90s as a simple pilot based out of a small, but quirky, Alaska town.

  3. Ugh, can we just not?

  4. There’s an ESPN 30 for 30 documentary on Netflix called Broke, about how something like a million percent (real fact from the movie that I definitely gave my full attention to so that I could remember the exact percent when I would tell my internet friends about the documentary two weeks later) of professional athletes are bankrupt within a few years of retirement. The documentary talks about how the male dick-measuring combined with little or no financial education plus huge salaries results in players squandering their fortunes on jewelry, cars, parties, and the more noble slippery slope of helping out their friends and family back home.

    Worth watching.

    Oh, and yes, The Kardashian clan feeds into this by not really having realistic jobs and being in the limelight, but seriously, Mr. President? I don’t think the tabloids of yesteryear were less wealth oriented than today. Maybe there are more cameras today, but blah blah blah this whole argument is really boring to me. Regular people like us like to monitor the famous people like Kardashians because they’re an entertaining train wreck and we feel like we’d do much better if placed in their position. That’s it.

    • But seriously: There’s a big difference between the tabloid culture of my pre-internet youth (seeing Liz Taylor divorce stories and rumored sightings of Dead Elvis while waiting for my mom to pay for groceries) and the current tabloid culture (wall-to-wall coverage on TV, phones, computers, beginning at whatever age your parents no longer control all media — 10 or 12? Or 7? — so you know exactly where nonsense people live, eat, shop, relax, feud, and self-righteously justify themselves).

      I mean, literal fact: the tabloids of my youth were obsessed with Liz Taylor, who was like 70, therefore not youth-appealing/aspirational. It was not the same as being led through every rich jerk’s garbage McMansion on reality TV. I loved Guns’n'Roses and Led Zeppelin when I was 16 but I had no idea what Axl’s house looked like, ya know? He was a more distant figure. They all were.

      I am trying to say it used to be about the music, man.

  5. How did the Kardashian’s 15-minutes of fame get turned into a Ken Burns 10-part PBS documentary of fame?


  7. Sweet fucking Christ this asshole woman just made Paul Ryan levels of angry. None of this cultural nightmare would even have happened if she didn’t push her kids the way she did. And now she has a talk show? And who are the sycophants who are agreeing with her?

    Shut it down. Shut it down now.

    • She is so transparently dumb and self-serving like Paul Ryan that it really does red-zone into that same surreal, infuriating place.

      Her Ed McMahon there knows. He has suicidal ideation on his face the whole clip. I wish at the end instead of finding something nice to say so he can get paid, he’d just said, “You’re an idiot.” (I like to think he did kind of backhand her a little, when — in effect — he says it doesn’t matter how valid the argument against your family is, you will circle the wagons to support each other like you just did. Maybe I infer too much! But I hope that’s what he meant.)

  8. I thought I could make it through this video. I was fully braced for all nonsense and arogant self congratulations, but then the audience snuck up behind me and exploded into idiotic applause and Wooo noises and I had to reach up from the floor and frantically mash at my keyboard till it all shut down.

  9. Kanye doesn’t go on a vacation. Vacation goes on a Kanye.

  10. I grew up when the President did, and I don’t want to scare anyone, but I had to WAIT to use the phone in a house with 9 other people. And about half of the time, when it was finally my turn, my friend’s line was BUSY! And then…THEN…I had to WALK to her house to tell her whatever it was I wanted to say. I am a survivor.

  11. Yes, dream big, work hard and you can earn minimum wage (maybe). Why pick on Kanye and Kim? They worked for everything they got and every one of us can eventually be them if we want it enough! We just don’t want it enough. God this is so logical…all we have to do is work hard and dream and everything will be OK. WHY AM I JUST REALIZING THIS NOW?

  12. I just read that Kanye recently purchased two separate million-dollar armored SUVs. So I think Kris’s point has been validated.

    Can we all just go watch Elysium as many times as it takes to feel confident enough to start the uprising?

  13. I want to replace the studio audience with a laugh track.

  14. I hate that the President of the United States acknowledged the existence of Kim Kardashian.

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