Obviously, things work a little differently in places that aren’t the place where I live. I get it, and I’m not tryna be down on it. People can use the metric system if they want, whatever gets them through it. But one thing I am NOT ok with is this tiny English boy being SO MEAN to his English teacher in a rap battle they’re both in for some reason that I cannot discern, maybe because the video is 17 minutes long and there is no way I’m ever going to watch all of it right now and maybe the explanation doesn’t come in until the end! Really, the point of watching this video is that the English teacher kind of destroys the boy in the rap battle. And you’re like, “Whoa, you can allegedly teach English AND you can destroy a student in a white rap battle?” And that’s impressive. But really, HOW IS THIS BABY ALLOWED TO BE SO MEAN TO THIS YOUNG TEACHER? Haha and also, please skip to about 2 minutes in because the first 1.5 minutes are some kind of weird commercial FOR the rap battle? I don’t understand any of it.

“You study dead poetry and you’re gonna die and become a dead POET TREE!” <3 <3 <3 I don't think that was the exact line but whatever line was kind of like that, that was my favorite line. A+, "student"! Great job, "teacher"! I'm sorry that boy said the F word to you so many times! That was alarming, because of how we were introduced to this battle with the idea that you were his teacher! Maybe that's just how they do it over there! You should grade him harshly on his next paper, not unfairly, but just the grade that he actually deserves! (Thanks for the tip, Jon!)

Comments (20)
  1. School, Cool, Golden Rule, and Fool all rhyme.

    Consider the battle of djfreshie vs his old English teacher already decided.

  2. So, this wasn’t the extended redband trailer for the remake of “Dead Poet’s Society” (2 Ded 2 Poetz)? I was wondering why Channing Tatum looked so scrawny.

  3. Let me try:

    Yo, your wife’s ass is as fat as a lorry
    Even though you’re working class, you still vote Tory
    Walkin’ round thinking you look like George Clooney
    When everybody knows your face screams “Wayne Rooney”

  4. Mark Grist seems to know a lot about Pokemon, WoW and Bey Blades for a man his age…

  5. Still not as good as “Parents Jus Don’t Understand”

  6. Fuck a beat?

  7. That teacher is kind of cute.

  8. This contest tricks them into eating their poetry vegetables. Well done.

  9. The kid might have said fuck a lot but it was the teacher who laid the student out like a fucking new born fucking baby

  10. I feel like rap battling in England might be easier than the US because there are lots of words that rhyme with lorry.

    • From what I’ve seen of English students, there’s not a battle they can’t win if they point and yell a Latin-sounding word.

  11. Hey guys, remember when the bad guy from Robocop was Wilson from House’s dad in the movie Dead Poets Society? I wish that guy was this kid’s dad.

    • And do you remember when the crime boss from Robocop was Dave Matthew’s dad on House and they cut his brain in half and that solved everything?

  12. “Fuck you, miss!”

  13. Andrew Ryan Cassin  |   Posted on Feb 2nd, 2012 +5

    So that’s what James Murphy has been up to since LCD ended…

  14. This rap battle couldn’t be whiter if it was in Engl-er Finland.

    • The kid’s got talent, though. At 2:43 he spits out a really nice phrase. And it’s funny how he tries to comment on what he’s doing, to pause and say “see what I did there”?

      Grist, on the other hand, is waaaay too relaxed. He’s making funny put-downs that rhyme but not really rapping IMO.

      So basically what I am saying is one shouldn’t disparage white rappers, yo, because their mode of expression is also legitimate in a multicultural society. BOOOOM.

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