When I was in college, I had a couple roommates who were film students. They were going through headshots for some short they were making and they came across a guy whose had all these small credits, but the one that stuck out most to my was was this one: Dog Day Afternoon – Pizza Delivery Guy.

In case you don’t remember, Dog Day Afternoon is a movie about Al Pacino back when he was a good actor and John Calaze back when he was the love of Meryl Streep’s life and Chris Sarandon when he was also a real actor, so real in fact that he was married to Susan Sarandon who still has his last name even though we all keep forgetting that part. It’s just too hard to wrap our minds around.

Dog Day Afternoon did not star the dude who played Pizza Delivery Guy. His scene was maybe thirty seconds long. Al Pacino and John Cazale order pizzas for their hostages. The pizza guy walks over, hands over the pizzas, walks off. You can barely make out his face, it all happens so fast. Which is exactly why it was the perfect crime. Because…you see…it was a total lie. He hadn’t been the Pizza Delivery Guy at all. We rented Dog Day Afternoon and watched it still by still on our VHS player and it wasn’t him. It was the greatest fake movie role lie ever. My roommates were so impressed that they ended up casting him.

I bring all this up because this montage of that’s been floating around since yesterday. Meet Jesse Heiman, the extra whose been in everything:

I was excited when I first read the title: World’s Greatest Extra. That felt sweet and charming. I’d thought I’d see some old man hobbling about, sitting on park benches, dabbing the sweat gently off his brow with an actual handkerchief. Instead, I got this kid.

How do I put this? Doesn’t he seem just a little… smug?  Too in on the joke. Somehow too much of an overdog to be a true underdog.

Another question: how can his life not be exactly like the movie Cyrus?  How can he not be trying to take Jonah Hill down, now that he sees that the world is actually quite kind to exactly the type of dude that he is.   Is Jonah Hill *not* married to Jesse Heiman’s mom and are they *not* living together in a house? Because if that’s the case, I am very confused about the plot of this kid’s life.

Comments (52)
  1. I was really disappointed to see that montage and it was obvious that he had a lot of speaking parts and small roles… I just wanted to see some creep lurking in a bunch of shots and never saying anything. I also say boo to this world’s “greatest” extra.

  2. Soooo I shouldn’t send you my montage of Jesse Heiman doing the Wilhelm scream?

  3. You know what else has a lot of extras?

  4. Um, so this is a video from Jesse Heiman’s YouTube channel where he films a double rainbow.

    I think the Internet is about to become a gravitational singularity you guys.

  5. The world’s greatest extra? A little on the nose, no?

  6. Little known fact: Sean and Chris Penn were, in fact, married at one point.

  7. I have clicked every word in this post but none are taking me to the montage in question!

  8. Star Trek- Guy in the red shirt

    Role Discription- be the only one to die somehow, always*

    Pay scale- N/A

    *must be shorter and uglier than William Shatner

  9. In the meantime, here’s the video in question: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IdEBu7ODVk8

  10. The montage reminds me of this for some reason :

    http://www.fatalfarm.com/tvthemes/FFDoogieHowserMD.mov

  11. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  12. He looks like the guy from Buttcrack. I enjoy not being fired, but anybody not at work can feel free to google image search buttcrack to see what I’m talking about.

  13. The music makes me suspect that this is but one step in his plan to commit nefarious malarkey. I do so hate nefarious malarkey.

  14. Jonah Hill is the worst! And so is this guy! And they have matching initials!

    Logic dictates I now hate every JH. Sorry, Jennifer Hudson :(

  15. Even Joan Holloway?

    No wait, she got married. No wait! Her name is Harris. That doesn’t work either!

  16. THIS KID IS A DUDE, MAN. HE’S LIKE 30

  17. There are a few jokes that my dad would tell me growing up that, no matter how many times he said it, would always make me laugh. One was when he would make a phone call (this worked better in the days before caller ID and omnipresent cell phones) and the person on the other end would say “hello” my dad would then say “Yes, hello. Is this the person to whom I am speaking?” It STILL makes me laugh, right now in fact. Very heartily.

    Another joke was, when watching a film, and in a scene with TONS of extras, my dad would say “look, that’s me right there!” Never failed to make me laugh. RIP dad. Rest in peace.

    Oh wait… he’s still alive. Nevermind.

  18. No one has made a Heiman/Hymen joke yet?

    I’m disappointed in you guys, virgin jokes are the best!

  19. This kid reminds me of that kid in high school who everyone made fun of, and you tried to be nice to, but then dear god, you realized why everyone made fun of him and you wished he stopped trying so damned hard and would just leave everybody alone.

    • That person always finds me, always tells me painfully boring stories, and I always smile and laugh when I am supposed to. I am a crazy magnet, but we live in a society people! (be nice.)

    • I’m sorry you guys.

      By the way, though, do you want to hear my interpretation on how the final fantasy series is actually released in reverse chronological order?

  20. don’t forget about his starring role!
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wN2nQ_UaQsw

  21. The funny thing is, whatever his acting skills might be, this guy’s actually a lousy extra. He’s got a recurring non-speaking role on “Chuck”, lurking in the background as one of Chuck’s coworkers, and he’s pretty distinctive-looking, to the point where, whenever I see him lurking in the background on something else, I get distracted thinking, “Hey! It’s Chuck’s coworker!” Which I’m pretty sure is the exact opposite of what an extra is supposed to do.

  22. okay, I don’t want to jump to any illogical conclusions here.. but judging as this dude doesn’t seem to age, I think we must all assume he’s been cursed to walk this world as an extra for ever.
    always the background never the bride.

  23. I found a shop on the Internet: fashionclpumps.com The shoes are very elegance, beautiful riches and honour

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