Videogum » Hair

BREAKING: Nicolas Cage Will Stop “Experimenting” With His Hair

Gabe — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 17:30:43 +0000

Nicolas Cage, the American actor, has a long history of “eccentric” hairstyles. Who could forget the gray mop of Sorcerer’s Apprentice (still the #1 movie in America, 74 weeks running!) or the Mrs. Gene Simmons look of Bangkok Dangerous (now out on VHS!)? Well, those heady days (get it?) are over, as Mr. Cage has said in a recent interview that at the tender age of 48, he is done “experimenting” with his look. From ONTD:

The 48-year-old actor used to enjoy changing his hairstyle but insists he now plans to stay the way he is and won’t be growing out his locks in the near future.

Discussing his role as Cameron Poe in ‘Con Air’, he told Empire magazine: “The look was a little bit country, more of a Southern look from the 70s.

“I’ve always tried to experiment with different looks, but I’ve stopped doing that now. You probably won’t see me doing any different hairstyles for a long time.”

You could write a whole magazine article investigating why this magazine article was discussing Nicolas Cage’s role in Con Air. We’re gonna need a dumber Pulitzer! I love Nicolas Cage’s implication here that he has always been in charge of his looks. The costume designer worked meticulously with the director to create an atmosphere for the movie, except when it came to Nicolas Cage, who everyone agreed should be left to his own Faced Devices, because he’s a Head Genius. In any case, it’s just nice to see him settling down and being more comfortable with himself. And I’m sure whichever wig he has permanently soldered to his hamburger scalp can, with enough time and money and black market surgical procedures, be removed and replaced with a longer, uglier wig in the event that he does change his mind.

That’s Your Hair Salon: Blow

Gabe — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 14:30:26 +0000

Looking good, everybody. Looking great. Good haircuts. Good eyeliner. Very exciting sexual chemistry in the foyer of a Springfield, Missouri hair salon. “Do we just fuck right here, Ty Barnes?” “Yeah, let me just, hold on, yeah, perfect. Go for it.” Hey, did you do something different with your hair? Yeah, I entered into a pansexual nightmare in the foyer of a Springfield, Missouri hair salon. Oh, cool, well, you look great. Thanks, do you have the number for the hospital? Yes, it’s 9-1-1. (Thanks for the tip, werttrew.)

BREAKING NEWS: Bald Matt Damon “Jealous” Of Bald Jake Gyllenhaal

Gabe — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 16:30:11 +0000

PUT DOWN WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND READ THIS IMPORTANT NEWS ARTICLE IF YOU WANT TO EVEN KNOW WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THE WORLD THESE DAYS! YOUR VERY LIFE MIGHT DEPEND ON IT! From People (via @cassiemurdoch):

Freshly bald Matt Damon loves his new look. What he doesn’t love is having his shaved head compared to Jake Gyllenhaal’s.

“Wow, I try not to envy, but I have to say Jake’s got a damn good-looking head,” Damon, 40, told PEOPLE at Wednesday’s New York premiere of his new movie about a killer virus, Contagion. “He sure does have a beautiful round head.”

“Normally you say, ‘That’s a beautiful head of hair, but that’s a beautiful head he’s got,’ ” Damon says laughing. “Gyllenhaal definitely gets the blue ribbon for the best bald head over me.”

HOLY SHIT WE WILL CONTINUE TO FOLLOW THIS STORY AS IT DEVELOPS. WILL JAKE GYLLENHAAL RESPOND? WILL THE WORLD EXPLODE? WHAT’S GOING ON IN LIBYA NOW I FORGET? THE WORLD ANXIOUSLY AWAITS THE NEWS!

The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: 40,000 Watts Of MegaBASS

Gabe — Tue, 16 Aug 2011 21:30:46 +0000

Look at her crazy hair! It is going so crazy! I’m pretty sure this is what they are talking about when they are talking about Miami Bass Wars Vol. 2. (You know how they are always talking about that? Sometimes it is just like SHUT UP ABOUT THE MIAMI BASS WARS VOL. 2 ALREADY lol.) Also, is plugging your ears really enough? She doesn’t even look like she is plugging them very seriously. To tell the truth, she looks downright lackadaisical when it comes to the plugging business. Oh well. Her problem, I guess. What’s that? I SAID YOUR PROBLEM, I GUESS! For today’s Caption Contest, pretend that you are Adam Sandler in The Mighty Zohan or whatever the hell that movie was called and this lady has just come into your hair salon after sitting in this car. What silly thing do you say to her? Haha. Good contest! Great contest!

Winner will receive special mention in this week’s Monsters’ Ball. BOMBE ECLATE! (Via Neatorama.)

These Are Your Bangs: Undetectables Designer Bangs

Gabe — Mon, 10 Jan 2011 19:30:33 +0000

“Yeah, I want bangs, who doesn’t?! But as a busy modern person in this crazy MySpace world, I just don’t have time to sit around on my dumb butt waiting for my hair to grow. I’ve got SEXTS to send and RAZR Scooters to ride. BUT I WANT BANGS NOW, GOD DAMN IT ALL. There must be some way to just, like, scotch tape a flop of human hair onto my rashy forehead that looks like kind of shitty straw bangs, like, the bangs from a terrible wig, right? That has to exist. I would pay upwards of $10 to have what amounts to an ugly bangs toupee. The best part would be that it would cover up my unsightly blemishes and my embarrassingly large forehead! Please, world, MAKE IT SO.”
-You

“It is totes so.” – World

Naked Model’s Hair Catches On Fire At Diddy Album Release Party

Gabe — Thu, 16 Dec 2010 14:30:49 +0000

After the jump, you can see a video of a naked model’s hair catching on fire while she sits in a bathtub at Diddy’s album release party (via BuzzFeed, Vulture, Dlisted, 50Cent.livejournal.com, TheDailyWhat, and RealTalkNY). It’s basically our generation’s Clay Duke tape, I’m sure. Oh, and it is pretty safe for work because the footage is grainy and the model is sitting in a deep soaking tub (maybe a Kohler? Not sure! None of the hip hop blogs will tell me whether or not the soaking tub at Diddy’s album release party was a Kohler or not) so it’s really just a matter of whether or not you WANT to watch it. Ask yourself this question: “do I want to watch a model’s hair catch on fire as she soaks in a tub (possibly Kohler) at Diddy’s album release party while Kevin Hart babbles nonsense into a microphone–and another dude casually throws rose petals into the tub for some reason, like, dude, really? Rose petals? Did you just watch Red Shoe Diaries or something? Take it easy, this is an album release party on Ustream and that woman was hired to sit there–or don’t I?” And then based on how you answer that question, watch the video or do not watch the video. That’s the best I can offer.

Tricky Sneaky Booby Traps

Gabe — Thu, 07 Oct 2010 13:30:05 +0000

Seems to me like someone needs to look up the definitions of the following words: “tricky,” “sneaky,” and “booby traps.” Because what I am seeing here are more like “sad pointless indulgences of paranoia.” I do like to imagine what happens when someone sets these tricky sneaky booby traps (which, again, are neither tricky, nor sneaky, nor booby traps) and finds their booby trap (not a booby trap) triggered. Sample:

Teen Korner: Justin Bieber Blow Dries His Hair Just Like The Rest Of Us!!! So Neat!!!!!

Gabe — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:44:39 +0000

Yo Friendsters,

You know, cool dudes who think that being in touch with their emotions is actually awesome and young women who tell everyone they aren’t sure if they could bring a child into this world but will probably end up doing so eventually anyway and that’s great, I think we can all agree that celebrity culture has gotten out of hand. It’s wack! It’s a wack attack! How are young people like you supposed to discover what makes you a special snowflake, when you’re being bombarded 25/9 with celebrity culture reminding you that you’re not a beautiful enough or famous enough of a snowflake, or that you don’t have the cool kind of smartphone. Motorola ROKR! It can be hard to iTunes that stuff out, but you should try, dawgs.

Of course, on the other hand, since we are bombarded with it 26/5, sometimes it is cool to see how celebrities are just like you and me. They get sick and die, too! And sometimes they get mad at each other, just like your mom and dad who don’t understand ANYTHING. And sometimes, although we almost never get to see this, they spend way too much time trying to make themselves look good, because they too suffer from the quiet despair of a solitary, meaningless existence. What I’m trying to say is check out this video of Justin Bieber blow drying his hair, homies!

This Man’s Hair Looks Like A Hat

Gabe — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 16:16:19 +0000

I’m not going to lie to you. The video after the jump features a man whose hair is styled to look like a hat. At first you’re like, “there is something about that man’s hat.” And then you are like “also, why does he never take his hat off, not even in the bathhouse? Silly!” But then slowly you come to realize that he doesn’t take his hat off, not even in the bathhouse, because it’s not a hat! It is just his hair in the STYLE of a hat. That’s what’s happening here. I just would hate for you to follow the jump and watch the video and think that I had been dishonest with you. But I think that after you watch this video you will find that I was nothing if not completely honest and straight-forward. “Yes,” you will say, “he was right, that was a video about a man whose hair was shaped to look like a hat. Just like he said.”

Who Wore It Worse?

Gabe — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 14:26:29 +0000

Gwyenth Paltrow’s head vs. Kate Gosselin’s head: everyone loses.