Showing All "Ellen Degeneres" Posts

Apparently there are people out there who think this newly identified species of monkey looks like Jake Gyllenhaal. I do not see it and, frankly, am shocked that no one is comparing it to that ruined…   Read Story »
Bill O'Reilly is a liar and an asshole, end of story. There's absolutely nothing he could ever really do to make up for the years of disinformation and hate-mongering that he has broadcast through…   Read Story »
On yesterday's episode of Ellen, which is normally a rather cloying affair, although also entirely inoffensive and I don't mean that in some kind of College Campus Misanthrope kind of way where…   Read Story »
This is one of those situations where I could try and do some research and explain what is going on here, but does anyone really want that? I don't think so. Sometimes it's more fun to have a little…   Read Story »
Gwyneth Paltrow has taped an episode of The Ellen DeGeneres Show that won't broadcast until Thursday, by why wait two days when we can make fun of her now! First of all, she wants more kids, which is…   Read Story »
Ellen DeGeneres, the well known America Hater, sat in the lead-sealed nuclear attack bunker that she had built on her Malibu property. It was 10 feet underground, protected by another six feet of…   Read Story »
Ellen DeGeneres was the clue on a recent episode of Family Feud, and some of the important and very well known facts that the family knew about her were so obvious and well known that actually this…   Read Story »
I don't watch American Idol. For one thing, I am 102 years old. What is there for me in American Idol? Is there medicine in it? How about a comfortable place to sit away from the window because it's…   Read Story »
As you may have heard, Ellen Degeneres, America's sweetheart, made a pretty big announcement on her show yesterday: Whoops. That isn't it. Don't get me wrong, Ellen Degeneres playing mother nature…   Read Story »
Did you know that Hugh Laurie, star of House, M.D., is not actually American at all? He's from England, where he was a famous comedian! OF COURSE YOU KNOW THAT. Everyone knows that, but because talk…   Read Story »