An art collective (or something, I have no idea how that stuff works) has installed some charming (I’m sure) signs in New York subway stations that say SPOILER ALERT. Personally, I think these signs would be more appropriately displayed around the necks of cheating lovers and Burger King calorie information posters, but I understand how getting the sign to those locations might require Neck Face style rooftop shenanigans. It’s just not very safe! So, a train arrival time countdown clock will have to do. SPOILER ALERT: your train is eventually coming, either sooner or later than you had expected or hoped? Art is weird, you guys. Speaking of art, why don’t you follow your caption muse and caption this photo. What are those two art lovers thinking or saying? What is the SPOILER? WHAT DOES THE TRAIN THINK OF ALL THIS? (In art, trains can talk! Haha, art, you crazy.)

Winner will receive special placement in this week’s SPOILER ALERT Monsters’ Ball. Won’t that be SPOILER ALERT neat? (Image via LaughingSquid.)

I predict that in the future, when the lines between public and private life have blurred completely, and the national obsession with celebrity culture has become so overwhelming that it’s simply a natural immutable fact of being an engaged member of human society, that the presidential race will come down to three candidates: Michael Cera*, Fred, and Justin Bieber. It will come down to factional differences in political pop-culture belief systems, namely the perennial political argument of who you want for a president: someone who wears hoodies, someone who wears t-shirts with his name on them, or someone who wears pointy toed leather boots and button-downs with dragons silk-screened across the back with microphones in their talons?

I just hope that Michael Cera’s campaign provides voters with an obvious enough choice after eight miserable years of President Dane Cook. Pizza is on the way! Yes we Carles! The MP3 of “No You Don’t” is available at http://www.stereogum.com.

*I know that Michael Cera is Canadian, but by this point it won’t matter because President Schwarzenegger will have long ago convinced the Pepsi Congress to change the citizenship requirement laws.

I think this movie looks good, but I’m nervous that this is just the American Gangster effect. Do you remember the trailers for American Gangster? They featured a Jay-Z song, too, and no matter how good the entire movie might be, you just kind of knew that it would never be any better than those two exciting minutes (unless maybe the Jay-Z song played in a constant loop running throughout the movie, but that was unlikely). In more important news, what happened to Ethan Hawke? Is it even possible for him to get cast as a human being who isn’t an unraveling disaster anymore? Between this and Before The Devil Knows You’re Dead, I’m fully convinced that Ethan Hawke lives in his car and is just waiting for the right moment to murder his mom for the insurance money. Reality bites, indeed!

But a real estate developer said the location may likely be well outside Williamsburg, in the new BellTel Lofts in Downtown Brooklyn. Not near downtown, like Brooklyn Heights, but downtown-downtown, hard by the state and federal courthouses, the city’s emergency-response command center and the rows of barber shops, check-cashing services, fast-food joints and vendors selling counterfeit DVDs, religious statues and floor soaps that promise to remove jinxes.

In other words, things could get more real than usual for “The Real World.”

Things could get more real, you guys. I know what that means because I was raised in a society of deeply codified bigotry.

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Riding high on the successful launch of an accelerated, action packed 13-week episode cycle with more favorite Real World drama packed into 1-hour episodes, MTV has greenlit the hit reality series for a 21st season. Production will move from the west coast to the east coast as Bunim-Murray Productions begins shooting in Brooklyn, NY this summer. Continuing with the new format of expanding the episodes to one-hour, the network has ordered 12 episodes of “The Real World: Brooklyn” which is scheduled to premiere in Q1 2009.

(via Observer)

I feel like every year there are reports of how the producers have to edit around scenes of harassment by the locals. In the Philadelphia season it was so bad they couldn’t even edit that footage out, there was just too much harassment. Like, there was the episode where a guy came up in a bar and tried to hit one of the cast members with a stool, and in another episode I saw some of them were walking down the street and a beer can was thrown at them from a passing truck. I say Brooklyn can do better. We gentrified this city through the sweat on our backs and the money in our parents’ wallets, right guys?

No location has been announced yet, but it has to be Williamsburg, right? So, let’s set up some human barricades around Galapagos and Larry Lawrence. What else, hipsters? Sound Fix? Planet Thailand? I don’t live there because I don’t have any Krazy Kat and Ignatz face tattoos and i don’t ride a tall bike, help me out goofballs.