Look, if you're going to try and get in the balloon, sometimes you're going to get stuck in the balloon. Don't freak out, that's just part of it. See what I mean? A lot of times in these blogs…   Read Story »

It's hard out here for a shrimp, you guys. And it's not getting any easier. Yesterday I made a joke about the comical impotence of running down the street in flopping boat shoes to confront your wife…   Read Story »

Sure. Yes. Cute. And "we should all be so" etc, etc. But I will tell you this: charming old men singing about their obsessive hobbies aside, Dalton Stevens "The Button King" is one smooshed cat…   Read Story »

It's probably kind of weird being a kid these days. It seems like they all have confidence and stuff? Everyone is a special snowflake and even the would-be bullies probably feel that attacking…   Read Story »

The Nobel Peace Prize has been awarded to Liu Xiaobo, who the New York Times describes as "an impassioned literary critic, political essayist and democracy advocate." Personally, I haven't read any…   Read Story »

OK, sure, maybe those 49 second pizzas aren't really going to taste very good. And OK, maybe the world's fastest gun reloader is terrifying even without such a terrifying skill, but with such a…   Read Story »