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youfuckedjeff
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 0Posted on Oct 14th, 2011 | re: What Will Fred Durst's Catchphrase Be On His CBS Sitcom? (41 comments)

the Who cover

 +4Posted on Aug 18th, 2011 | re: Child Actors Are Not People! (48 comments)

is Val Kilmer still fat?

 +5Posted on Aug 18th, 2011 | re: Child Actors Are Not People! (48 comments)

this all just reminds me of those awful people that say stuff like “we’re their teachers, but we’re the ones learning” like, shut the fuck up. they are babies! babies are stupid!

 +2Posted on Aug 16th, 2011 | re: Lauren Conrad Is A Goddamned Liar! (54 comments)

I think it’s probably not the best marketing strategy to suggest that something that tastes as weird as Miracle Whip (I’M GUESSING) could in fact be made of people.

 +6Posted on Aug 2nd, 2011 | re: Gold Surprise (59 comments)

was I the only one expecting it to be Gabe? is that not what this website is for?

 +25Posted on Jun 21st, 2011 | re: Courtney Stodden Would Like You To Like Quit Like Bullying Like People (78 comments)

was she born in a hookah bar? and then forced to live in that hookah bar for 16 years? is that why the video is so dark?

 +6Posted on Jun 21st, 2011 | re: Courtney Stodden Would Like You To Like Quit Like Bullying Like People (78 comments)

“BRB I see a fence that hasn’t been driven into yet! sorry, what were you saying?”

 +37Posted on Jun 21st, 2011 | re: Courtney Stodden Would Like You To Like Quit Like Bullying Like People (78 comments)

so do we blame this on factory farm meat hormones or progeria? because I am 28 and going grey and she looks at least like my big sister?

Sauce for the goose, Mr. Saavik. Did you have to inject it directly into your carotid artery immediately before we were scheduled to go on?*

*now accepting nominations for a bad Star Trek reference lifetime achievement award.

 +3Posted on Apr 4th, 2011 | re: That's Your Girlfriend: Felice Cohen (87 comments)

I lived in a glorified basement apartment in Boston for two years that flooded every time it rained. over the course of my occupancy, it gradually went from “this is a catastrophe! call the management company immediately!” to “just don’t put anything on that side of the apartment” to “put stuff over there, but only if it isn’t worth a lot of money”. and even I realize this lady is BONKERZ. why do I always get the crazy girls?

 0Posted on Mar 30th, 2011 | re: Best New Party Game 49: #ottermovies (195 comments)

Otterrun!

 +8Posted on Mar 30th, 2011 | re: Best New Party Game 49: #ottermovies (195 comments)

Don’t Be a Sea Lion to Otter Central While Cracking Your Clams in the Hood

 +8Posted on Mar 29th, 2011 | re: The Videogum Why Don't YOU Caption It? Contest: Terrible Invisalign Rap (120 comments)

and that’s the tooth!

 +20Posted on Mar 29th, 2011 | re: The Videogum Why Don't YOU Caption It? Contest: Terrible Invisalign Rap (120 comments)

fear of a plaque planet

 0Posted on Mar 29th, 2011 | re: Ina Garten Begrudgingly Does Respectable Thing (71 comments)

“ach du libre! you just killed das baby!”*
“no it’s cool, it was Hitler.”
“you are under arrest.”

*flawless accent

 +4Posted on Mar 29th, 2011 | re: Ina Garten Begrudgingly Does Respectable Thing (71 comments)

when asked for comment, Ray unhinged her jaw and swallowed a frozen rat whole.

 +31Posted on Mar 21st, 2011 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Garden State (275 comments)

and for totes serious fuck this movie for doing the DRUG SCENE and having him take a drug that would have the opposite effect. Z-Raff took ecstasy and sat on the couch all night! where’s the nipple play? the glow stick competitions? the bisexual meanderings? THIS MOVIE IS SO FAKE IT MAKES ME SICK.

 +36Posted on Mar 14th, 2011 | re: What is the HTML for "Vomit"?: A Review of Battle: Los Angeles (101 comments)

you sir, are DIVISIVE. I for one loved your guest blogging. I love Gabe (sexually) but if he has to take time off for massive amounts of elective surgery I’m glad we are getting people with a different flavor for the job. isn’t the writing being something other than someone going DING DONG with a different avatar kind of the point of having a guest blogger?

and while it goes without saying that I don’t know how someone who has their dander up over the “liberal agenda” of this site (hruh?) hangs around reading it for at least two weeks at a time, well, I don’t fucking understand it. I wish I had that much free time? someone please pay me to read websites I am predisposed to disagree with all day, full dental and 401k preferred.

I just found out my friend is moving to NYC next month! and I might go stay with her! so I might go to this! possibly! I’m so excited!

 0Posted on Mar 10th, 2011 | re: Best New Party Game 48: Shut Up, Dad (133 comments)

yours is superior.

 +6Posted on Mar 10th, 2011 | re: Best New Party Game 48: Shut Up, Dad (133 comments)

the Green Miley

 +1Posted on Mar 10th, 2011 | re: Best New Party Game 48: Shut Up, Dad (133 comments)

“rosenuggz”

 +2Posted on Mar 8th, 2011 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: The Bucket List (135 comments)

my bucket list consists of “firing a gun wildly into the air” “eating a scone” and sexually harassing a number of male celebrities. also having the coolest story. whoops I’m dead.

Will Ferrell accountant, gratuitous rape scene, magic ham radio for nominations, in that order.

 +1Posted on Mar 4th, 2011 | re: Well, This Is A Particularly Hateful Tea Party Rally (115 comments)

does your garden variety christian (who they people aren’t? I hope? my parents usually spend their weekends watching NCIS reruns) know that muslims worship the same god they do? I don’t mean that they’re both practicing the same outdated ritual, but they are literally worshipping the SAME GUY. the religions just disagree on which prophet has a bigger dick and which men wearing dresses get to make the laws and whether slavery is totally cool or only sort of cool. KINDA SEEMS LIKE THEY DON’T.

 +2Posted on Mar 4th, 2011 | re: Well, This Is A Particularly Hateful Tea Party Rally (115 comments)

ICE TO MEET YOU