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 +7Posted on Aug 1st, 2011 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Greenberg (130 comments)

I tried to watch Dinner for Schmucks last night (required a lot of fast-forwarding), and now I am nominating it. Just like that. BAM!

 +21Posted on May 16th, 2011 | re: The Videogum Movie Club: Bridesmaids (126 comments)

At the screening I was in, a guy sitting in the lower right corner of the theater was laughing SO HARD at certain parts (some of them not even intentionally super-funny parts) that sometimes I wasn’t sure whether the audience was laughing at the movie or at the guy who was laughing at the movie. Studios should hire him to be their ringer.

 +9Posted on Mar 28th, 2011 | re: Friends With Benefits Trailer, You Guys (74 comments)

It’s kind of impressive how many times Justin Timberlake sang in the trailer, considering that he has been a Real Actor for a while now.

More intrigued by this than I was by No Strings Attached, if only because I prefer these two over NatShton.

 +6Posted on Mar 28th, 2011 | re: Midnight In Paris Trailer, You Guys (50 comments)

I’m still trying to figure out if there is *literal* magic involved. Maybe Owen Wilson came upon a midnight magic camp? (It’s an illusion!)

That’s probably it.

 +1Posted on Jan 4th, 2011 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Sisyphus Turns 2011 (558 comments)

The Wedding Date, because it is really bad. Away We Go, because it was full of WTFs/holes.

 +8Posted on Jul 22nd, 2010 | re: Comic-Con Is Humanly Impossible (157 comments)

I got a free Comic-Con pass from work so I’m taking the train down from LA (no self-respecting LA-person ever takes public transit, but I have heard that traffic is a nightmare) on Saturday to see what it’s all about. I have to say, my main emotion surrounding the whole thing is dread. I will look for you, Gabe, in the terrifying ponies pavilion.

 +11Posted on Apr 14th, 2010 | re: Lost S06E13: Welcome To Mr. Cluck's, Would You Like FUUUU With That? (119 comments)

I thought Desmond hit Locke so that Locke would see Jack again (at the hospital). Because Locke and Jack are having a sideways bromance, and… you know, spine things.

 +12Posted on Feb 26th, 2010 | re: You Wish The Quarantine Rapper Was Your Boyfriend (53 comments)

This guy is the new Flight of the Conchords.

 +1Posted on Feb 26th, 2010 | re: Blah Blah Blah, Indeed: Ke$ha Has Always Been Terribl$ (213 comments)

Is it just me, or is Ke$ha the Mr. Hyde to Taylor Swift’s Dr. Jekyll? Have we ever seen them in the same place at the same time?

 +2Posted on Jan 29th, 2010 | re: Best New Party Game 14.5 (69 comments)

I have never been a dog person, but for the sake of my family’s happiness I finally got used to my family’s giant, mischievous Saint Bernard. Now I find out that my dog is the father of a brood of puppies. I just don’t think that I can handle any more dogs, financially or emotionally. But my children are attached to these pups, and they seem to think that the woman who is willing to adopt them from us is a very bad person. I have already done so much for these puppies and for my family. I even competed in a hot dog eating contest, which resulted in so much vomit and discomfort. What should I do? I seek your spiritual counsel. I really don’t want my children to resent me any more than they already do.

 +4Posted on Jan 22nd, 2010 | re: Dear 2012, Leno To Host White House Correspondents' Dinner (43 comments)

I thought Obama was Team Conan! (pouts)

 +13Posted on Jan 14th, 2010 | re: Kids Reenact Scenes From Jersey Shore The Darndest Things (29 comments)

I just connected that the juiceboxes make them juice-heads. The kids are drinking steroids!

 +7Posted on Jan 12th, 2010 | re: Conan O'Brien Will NOT Continue Doing The Tonight Show (48 comments)

 +12Posted on Jan 12th, 2010 | re: People Who Are Suicidal Because Of Avatar Make Me Suicidal (52 comments)

After I saw The Santa Clause I desperately wanted to be a Christmas elf, and then my mom reminded me that I was a Jew and didn’t even like Christmas. I think I just had a mega-crush on that lead elf, who was totally Jewish.

 +2Posted on Jan 11th, 2010 | re: Buzz Aldrin Reviews Avatar (13 comments)

Wait, when did Buzz Aldrin interact with aliens? Why does he get to be the expert?

I met him once, too. I don’t think he shook my hand, but signed a glossy photo that’s sitting in some drawer in my closet at my parents’ house.

 +13Posted on Jan 11th, 2010 | re: Sarah Palin Is A "Journalist" For FOX News, Or: Puppies! (101 comments)

 +6Posted on Dec 10th, 2009 | re: Orrin Hatch (R-UT) Wrote A Hanukkah Song For Some Reason (32 comments)

As long as he’s in the studio, why doesn’t he rap about the posthumous baptism of Jewish Holocaust victims? (You crazy for that one, Mormons.)

 +14Posted on Dec 10th, 2009 | re: Fading Of The Cries Is Tommy Wiseau's The Room But With Swords (59 comments)

The production values here are much too high for Tommy Wiseau. But the level of wtf-ery is about right.

 0Posted on Dec 8th, 2009 | re: The Jersey Shore Nickname Generator (Back On-Line!) (113 comments)

If I enter my full name, I get “The Ashley Simpson of Cape May.” Translation, please?

 +3Posted on Dec 7th, 2009 | re: Saturday Night Live: Shy Ronnie, My Ninjas! (78 comments)

I am the only monster in the sea who loved the “To Catch a Predator”-style celebrity talk show? Bill Hader does those creepy investigative reporter types like nobody’s business.

 +6Posted on Dec 3rd, 2009 | re: Glee S01E11-12: Phew! Everything That Glees Is Not Suck! (42 comments)

I think in the past Puck has said that he prefers to go commando. So his “not wearing any” text is keeping his character consistent. Way to go, props!

 0Posted on Dec 2nd, 2009 | re: You Guys, Let's Have A Videogum Video Pizza Party For Real! (349 comments)

Let’s meet at a New York-style pizza place IN Los Angeles. There are plenty of monsters in LA… and some Videogum commenters, too. (Badump ching!)

 +1Posted on Dec 2nd, 2009 | re: That's Your Husband: Guy Who Twitters/Facebooks At The Altar (51 comments)

Er, altar. Spelling mishap.

 +5Posted on Dec 2nd, 2009 | re: That's Your Husband: Guy Who Twitters/Facebooks At The Altar (51 comments)

She’s doing it, too. He had her phone in his pocket. Obviously, they were made for each other. @husband and I are at the alter RIGHT NOW. <3

In the Hollywood blockbuster version of this film, Pastor Vicki is definitely going to be played by Bette Midler. And hopefully all of the fonts will be legible.