Walrus Parade
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 0Posted on Jan 7th, 2010 | re: YOU GOT DUNHAM'ED! MAYBE! PROBABLY NOT! BUT HOPEFULLY! (32 comments)

TMZ is saying pretty much the opposite: Leno’s getting his old timeslot back and Conan is canceled. :(

 +6Posted on Nov 17th, 2009 | re: Oprah Pretends That Sarah Palin Is An Actual Human Being (97 comments)

You and my gay roommates both, Mr. Hausfrau.

 +29Posted on Nov 17th, 2009 | re: Oprah Pretends That Sarah Palin Is An Actual Human Being (97 comments)

PART 3???

Just kidding. I’ll never watch any of this.

 +11Posted on Nov 16th, 2009 | re: Twilight: A Primer For Adults (46 comments)

Look, you can link as many youtube videos of Kristen Stewart doing her weird lip-bite-then-stick-her-tongue-out thing as you want, but that’s not going to make me be in love with her any less.

 +4Posted on Nov 12th, 2009 | re: Kids Can't Stop Sneezing The Darndest Things (16 comments)

Looks like someone had a pepper shaker for breakfast this morning.

 +15Posted on Nov 11th, 2009 | re: Date Night Of A Thousand Stars (52 comments)

I was kind of hoping this would be a sort of Liz Lemon/Michael Scott slash fanfic, but I guess a nonsensical action movie about a middle-aged married couple is also good?

 +19Posted on Nov 9th, 2009 | re: Saturday Night Live: Bad Taylor Swift, Good Twilight Parody (48 comments)

If someone could kindly upload a gif of Bill Hader spraying his mouth full of water into Kristen Wiig’s face, you would be my hero and receive one (1) upvote.

 +15Posted on Nov 6th, 2009 | re: Here Is A Photo Of Jon Hamm In High School (33 comments)

is that how women get erections?? with the brain in their pants exploding???


 +9Posted on Nov 6th, 2009 | re: Clearly, We Need To Name-Bomb The Paranormal Activity DVD (45 comments)

I really hate to attach my beautiful name to such a terrible film, but I’ll do it for the great FAME and NOTORIETY that comes with having your name in the credits of an independent horror film.

 +5Posted on Nov 3rd, 2009 | re: Victim In Fatal Car Accident Tragically Not Glenn Beck (38 comments)

“I only regret that I am not Glenn Beck.” – Nathan Hale, 1776

 +53Posted on Oct 29th, 2009 | re: Robert Pattinson Underwear, Ladies (You're Gross, Ladies) (67 comments)

The last thing I want to see when I take a girl’s pants off is terrifying Edward Cullen face staring into my eyes. That and/or a penis.

 +2Posted on Oct 23rd, 2009 | re: The Bigger Biggest Loser (9 comments)

I fear that even if we increase the number of weight loss competition “reality” shows by 100%, most Americans will still be fat and lazy. :(

 +15Posted on Oct 22nd, 2009 | re: Heather Graham Is Not The Public Option (25 comments)

This PSA in which Heather Graham stars as the Public Option is definitely helping something, if you know what I mean. In my pants area.

Can’t believe she’s almost 40.

 +13Posted on Oct 21st, 2009 | re: We Are All Just Waiting For 2012 (33 comments)

“It’s just neat launchin’ somethin’ that wasn’t intended to be launched.”

Truer words have never been spoken.

 +13Posted on Oct 19th, 2009 | re: The Barack Obama Chia Pet Seems Like A Reasonable Thing To Exist (33 comments)

I don’t see any weird racism here, just good old fashioned, color-blind awfulness.

 +11Posted on Oct 16th, 2009 | re: Thursday Night TV Open Thread (70 comments)

Last night we are all pre-op trans-centaurs.

 +13Posted on Oct 16th, 2009 | re: Falcon Heene Was In The Attic, And Now He Is Puking On TV (56 comments)

I hope these people all get arrested.

 -1Posted on Oct 15th, 2009 | re: Uh, Now What? (64 comments)


 +8Posted on Oct 15th, 2009 | re: Fine, The Falcon Heene "Pussification" Music Video (40 comments)

He’s alive! That son of a bitch, making me worry like that, I hope he accidentally finds his way on to a weather balloon and falls to his death!

 +16Posted on Oct 15th, 2009 | re: Fine, The Falcon Heene "Pussification" Music Video (40 comments)

Maybe if Falcon had been pussified a little harder we wouldn’t be in the mess to begin with.


 +5Posted on Oct 15th, 2009 | re: Bubble Boy 2: Flight Of The Navigator (21 comments)

Wait, so, he fell out? Because that makes this story go from whimsical to really sad.

 +1Posted on Oct 13th, 2009 | re: Gossip Girl S03E05: Rufus And Lily Are No Jim And Pam. Also: Sonic Youth? (48 comments)

That Sonic Youth tag is criminally underused.

 +6Posted on Oct 13th, 2009 | re: George Lopez To Continue The Attack On 10PM (11 comments)

Sometimes I forgot (and/or force deep, deep into my subconscious) that she was in one of my favorite movies.

 +14Posted on Oct 13th, 2009 | re: Kids Make Incredible, Mildly Depressing Documentaries The Darndest Things (31 comments)

I gotta tell you, as someone who is a CPAFCJ, the hours suck and the pay is pretty mediocre.

 +23Posted on Oct 9th, 2009 | re: Jim And Pam Got Married! And Thursday Night TV Open Thread! (81 comments)