Seriously let’s break down just the development of Clark Kent.

At the beginning of the movie, he’s already saving people from accidents. So he’s a hero at the VERY BEGINNING. Over the course of the film, we watch him learn that sometimes you have to NOT save people even if you can because… well just trust your Human Dad on this one. (there is literally never any payoff for that lesson, no time when he reveals himself and people close to him get hurt, the payoff scene is Costner’s death)

Then, Ghost Dad tells him something about choice and freedom and shit which convinces him to surrender to space Nazis but also not really surrender because he breaks out after 3 minutes in custody. Then Ghost Dad tries to pep talk him into saving Lois, but man, he saved like 15 dudes on that oil rig during his bearded hobo Bob Benson phase. He already knew how to save people.

Then at the very end of the movie he learns that he wasted a bunch of time throwing cars and shit when he could’ve been murdering people by snapping their necks.

I cannot say what point, if any, I’m supposed to take home from this shit.

“No half measures”?

Dawn of the Dead was much much better than this. It had some random spots of levity, it had clearly defined character traits, and most of all it had clearly directed action scenes that were tense and had understandable stakes(zombies want to eat the heroes, heroes want to shoot the zombies in the head). This movie was tedious, confusing despite being jampacked with an ENORMOUS amount of nonsense exposition from Ghost Dad and bepectacled scientists and domineering newsmen, and like Gabe says just unremittingly bleak and pointless.

So Superman learned that with the power of murdering Zod he could be naturally born and also genocide his entire species? What? What was the arc there again?

When Superman fights Invincible Space Hitler, what’s the audience supposed to be rooting for?

As a viewer, were we supposed to know that you can just snap a Kryptonian neck? Why did Superman and Zod spend so much time punching each other through office buildings and Hubble telescopes then? We had previously established in the first fight that getting punched or kicked or thrown around doesn’t do anything to either the good guy or the bad guys.

So all the big action sequences features at least one entirely invulnerable bad guy. That is terrible. Like the SVU guy subplot rivalry with Space Eva Braun… we’re just rooted for her charity, right? For some reason she wastes her time punching people and talking instead of just winning by throwing the cargo plane into the fucking sun. The human characters have no agency, no ability to do anything to her.

P.S. there ever an explanation for how Zod was able to INVADE SUIPERMAN’S DREAMS and show him that quickskull patch left over from Terminator 2?

Oh Pete, they beheaded that Stark boy.

Mother that was 2 seasons ago.

Is that a still from the sequel to “No Country for Old Men” where we see the bad guy age into a crotchety old guy with terrible eyesight?

In the related videos there is a video(“Pumpkin Carving III”) where he shoots a pumpkin with an AK-47 w/ 75 round magazine, to similar effect. He is wearing the same clothes and makes the same “common household implement” joke! So this is literally the same video with a less impressive firearm and a slightly better pumpkin face.

Pumpkin Carving IV is the Hangover II of pumpkin carving.

So I guess somebody DID NOT DO THEIR RESEARCH. LOOKING AT YOU CLOONEY

Why does Brad Pitt need a stunt double for a role as a lawyer in a movie written by Cormac McCarthy, anyway? His characters aren’t much for the running, jumping, and climbing trees shit.

There’s a whole untapped market of making prequels to those “normal guy has something weird happen to him” movies.

Haven’t we all wondered what sort of house James Brolin’s character lived in BEFORE he moved to Amityville?

“Welcome to Ghent!”

Shouldn’t the sequel be called “The War of 1812″?

The Sopranos does not hold up very well. It’s very broad and the dream sequences seem tacky. I SAID IT.

Deadwood is still good.

There’s a plot point in the third act that I can understand the US military being uncomfortable with assisting with, and I think the spokesman is just trying to be nice about spoilering the film.