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 0Posted on May 15th, 2010 | re: Thursday Night TV Open Thread (59 comments)

i thought that was really funny as well, but wasn’t friends supposed to be a rip off of the british show coupling?

 0Posted on May 15th, 2010 | re: Thursday Night TV Open Thread (59 comments)

i am upvoting both for annie’s boobs and your avatar. I actually used that (your avatar not boobs) in grad school for a powerpoint about a religious college that lifted its dancing ban
on another note, why are madmen ladies, with the notable exception of Joan, so much hotter in other shows, whereas madmen men are the hottest. Rogers wife on Flash Forward is gorgeous, whereas on madmen shes just ok. it must be the ties, scotch and unfiltered pall malls.

 +11Posted on Apr 12th, 2010 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Chasing Amy (291 comments)

I liked this movie a lot. and I generally really like Kevin Smith. I think it is pretty ridiculous for criticize comedies for unsophisticated camera work or dialogue that is distinct from the way that people actually talk. it is not cinema verite, nor is it going for gritty realism. The dialogue is different from the way people actually talk, because people aren’t actually all that funny in real life. I too have always thought the 3some plan felt forced, but it is not like the resolution of the movie actually hinged on the success of that ill-conceived plan. Nor is it inconceivable that a character that identifies as a lesbian could possibly have a love affair with a man. It surprises me that in your hipster ethic you regard sexuality as completely static. All the time in movies we accept that characters that identify as straight, particularly female characters and Peter Sarsgaard, have homosexual dalliances. I also agree that it is hard to take your self-righteous pandering to political correctness in issues of race and sexuality identity, when you so casually find humor at the expense of, or use words that people find offensive in relationship to, easy targets, ie. the developmentally disabled, the over weight, the jean shorted etc.) . I find it disappointingly lazy on your part as a humorist. Also having read a lot of Smith interviews and watched all of his Evening With and Evening Harder series, I think has been pretty upfront that some of the inspiration for Chasing Amy was explicitly about his insecurities about Adams’ sexual history and dating life before him (she did after all take Bud Bundy’s virginity) not about a trip to Australia.

That being said, I would like to nominate Rollerball
not with James Caan, but the ll Cool J version. It is a steaming pile of garbage and has been all over HBO as of late.

 +1Posted on Mar 12th, 2010 | re: Lost S06E07: The "Banana Leaf" (119 comments)

downvote me all you want, bastards. I’ve worked in college admissions for 9 years and shit like this bugs me. As others have pointed out, the idea that Ben would just be made principal is equally rediculous.

 -7Posted on Mar 10th, 2010 | re: Lost S06E07: The "Banana Leaf" (119 comments)

So here’s my frustration with last night’s episode . . .
What year was Alex in high school? I assumed a senior, I also assumed she was taking the AP European History exam because that is waht BEn had his PhD in. SO the AP exam is a national date. They are pretty much always the first couple weeks of May. Which means Alex would know whether or not she got into Yale, as May 1 is the National Decision deadline. I suppose she could have gotten waitlisted but it seems that would have been worth mentioning. And wouldn’t she still have asked her Principal for a letter way in advance any way. And Yale doesn’t actually care all that much if the person writing the letter is an alum, they care much more about the quality of the letter, in which case Dr. Ben’s letter would have probably been superior. Now if she is a junior, as my wife suggested, why is she asking for a letter in May of her junior year anyway? What was she going to do with it? And how exactly would the disgraced principal destroy her opportunity to go to Yale? He would just take it on his own to recommend she not get in? I think Yale admissions would find that suspicious. Also what does doing well on an AP exam have to do with Financial Aid? Nothing. Besides Yale meets 100% of financial need, and if she is qualified for Yale she could go to any of the excellent UC schools and get in state tution. But she is not going to get into Yale because she is stupid and French as that whole college tangent was stupid.

And I care about stuff like this because I am stupid. But I am not French.

 +3Posted on Jan 7th, 2010 | re: KFC Has A Proud History All Right, Of Racist Advertising! (121 comments)

Koreans are magical, though. I don’t see what’s racist about that.

 +3Posted on Dec 16th, 2009 | re: Little Chocolatiers Is A Real Show That Exists (57 comments)

This combines one of my wife’s favorite things with one of her least favorites. She hates chocolate. Just kidding. She hates dwarves. She’s a monster.

 +4Posted on Nov 18th, 2009 | re: Couples Retreat Somehow Gets Worse (55 comments)

“Let’s go see Couples Retreat in England in case there are no black people in it”
-Tom Cruise

 +21Posted on Jun 29th, 2009 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Crank (188 comments)

first of all Betty liked being tricked into having sex with louis because sex with louis is awesome because louis is a nerd and nerds are awesome at sex because all they think about is sex, whereas all jocks think about is sports. and second, Superbad is all about raping chicks? Are you referring to the “we could be that drunken mistake” line? Alcohol being used as social lubrication and reducing inhibitions in the high school/college mating ritual is tantamount to rape? That is certainly a cynical view of the world. It is not as if they were waiting for girls to pass out to have sex with them, or were investing in roofies.

 +1Posted on Jun 25th, 2009 | re: The World's First Actually Funny Song About Facebook (25 comments)

according to the you tube post it was recorded during a sound check.

 +2Posted on Jun 25th, 2009 | re: The World's First Actually Funny Song About Facebook (25 comments)

“R U fucking fucking fuck” -My favorite lyric

 +3Posted on Jun 23rd, 2009 | re: So, Is America Done With Jon & Kate Now? Please? (38 comments)

that is pretty much what he said on the show.

Playing a version of yourself in every role is to acting as Kevin Spacey is to Michael Cera

 +3Posted on Jun 22nd, 2009 | re: John Hodgman's Legendary Speech On Nerd Rights (19 comments)

this was great and it does sum up the bush administration without completely vilifying them (although I think that is warranted as well). the brilliance of Obama’s appeal is that he works with both groups. He is both the coolest guy in the room and smartest.

It seemed like Maher wanted to fuck her. He’s kinda a horn dog and I’m sure boning the daughter of the man you spent the entire previous year mocking would be quite the gaffle. She already established earlier in the interview that she puts out and she did seem to have an impressive stimulus package . . . in her shirt.
Thank you, thank you. I’ll be at the Zanies in Schaumberg all next week.

 +1Posted on Jun 18th, 2009 | re: The Bruno Moral Quandary (116 comments)

“Everyday is lesbian lover day”
I am proud of K-Mo for being gay.

 0Posted on Jun 18th, 2009 | re: Here Comes The Hangover Hangover (52 comments)

Your avatar is a t-shirt logo. Irony

 +4Posted on Jun 18th, 2009 | re: Nice Try, Michael Bay (38 comments)

Am i the only one that had to look up micturition? It means peeing. you’re welcome.

 -5Posted on Jun 17th, 2009 | re: Here Comes The Hangover Hangover (52 comments)

I hate it when people I am so clearly better than like things that I also like, but for way better and smarter reasons. Also my humor is never referential in the slightest. Nirvana was so much cooler when they were on Sub Pop and Pear Jam sucks when compared to Mother Love Bone as well as other grunge references.

 +8Posted on Jun 11th, 2009 | re: I Think We All Know Who The Comfort Wipe Is For (40 comments)

that poor old lady couldn’t wipe her ass before this product. That is so sad. Like that guy said, being fat definitely has its advantages. And they far outweigh being able to wipe your ass. I’m ordering three

 0Posted on Jun 10th, 2009 | re: Some Potential SPOILERS From The Hangover Because I Am A Nerd (15 comments)

i totally agree with this assessment. The whole lost night pieced together by little odd clues, even the whole alien thing . . . oops. spoiler alert.

 +1Posted on Jun 2nd, 2009 | re: New Wendy's Ad Tries To Be Like The Lonely Island, Fails (27 comments)

You give Lonely Island too much credit. Remember “2gether” or even the Blink 182 “All the Small THings” video. If anything, this commercial is about 7 years too late

 +5Posted on Jun 2nd, 2009 | re: What Should Be The Tagline For Heathers 2? (31 comments)

Heathers 2:
We still have an open door policy for assholes
Bulimia is so 2007
Martha Dumptruck’s revenge
Don’t patronize the bunny rabbits

 0Posted on May 21st, 2009 | re: Dad Yells At Son For Crying On His Webcam: The Best Keyboard Cat So Far (61 comments)

seriously though, soccer sucks