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TheRealMatt
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 +25Posted on Jun 30th, 2010 | re: 5nal Destination (40 comments)

I was upset that the fourth Fast and the Furious wasn’t titled The Fast and the 4ious, but this makes it better. Also, Anal Destination.

 +7Posted on Jun 24th, 2010 | re: Duh Aficionado Magazine: Bristol Palin Is Bad At Acting (88 comments)

I’m attempting this on blind faith that something will appear. If not, such embarrassing failure.

 +3Posted on Jun 24th, 2010 | re: Duh Aficionado Magazine: Bristol Palin Is Bad At Acting (88 comments)

Basically I’m saying Bristol Palin needs one of these:

 +25Posted on Jun 24th, 2010 | re: Duh Aficionado Magazine: Bristol Palin Is Bad At Acting (88 comments)

So wait, is Bristol Palin’s character actually Yo-Yo Ma? Because I know that line seems like it should be sarcastic, but the delivery has me confused.

 +2Posted on Jun 17th, 2010 | re: Dale Peterson Is Back, And He Still Needs To Relax! (51 comments)

“Still Don’t Give a Rip”
-Dorman Grace

 +30Posted on Jun 11th, 2010 | re: NSFW: Jim Carrey's Gay Sex Scenes (52 comments)

Internal Cumshot in the Spotless Behind

I am SO sorry.

 +39Posted on Jun 9th, 2010 | re: Doogie Horner: Noble Soldier In The War Against Comedy (92 comments)

It’s a good thing you didn’t perform this bit on America’s Got Talent.

 +12Posted on Dec 18th, 2009 | re: Gerard Butler And Jennifer Aniston Need New Pool Houses (28 comments)

-Hey, Gerard, remember how you’re Scottish and not a good actor?
-(sniffles) Yeah.
-That means I know when you’re speaking in an American accent for real, AND WHEN YOU’RE FAKING IT!

 +23Posted on Nov 11th, 2009 | re: Best New Party Game 12 (330 comments)

Baby Will Million Dollar!

 +14Posted on Nov 11th, 2009 | re: Best New Party Game 12 (330 comments)

Club Will Fight!

 +6Posted on Nov 9th, 2009 | re: The Carter Documentary Looks Great/:( (43 comments)

What if he said he was sorry?

 +6Posted on Oct 22nd, 2009 | re: That's Your Boyfriend: This Fucking Crybaby* (78 comments)

I must admit that is a good point. But…this is a “that’s your boyfriend” post, hence you are making fun of him.

 +18Posted on Oct 22nd, 2009 | re: That's Your Boyfriend: This Fucking Crybaby* (78 comments)

You won’t make fun of drunkest man ever but you will make fun of this guy? That’s messed up.

 +18Posted on Oct 8th, 2009 | re: Harry Connick Jr. + Australian Blackface = Eracism (66 comments)

 +12Posted on Oct 7th, 2009 | re: Best New Party Game 9 (250 comments)

You Won’t Actually Believe a Man Can Fly
It’s 4AM, do you know where your car is? Yes.
There’s something wrong with Esther’s birth certificate.

Remember those classic NYC films “Mulholland Drive,” “Inland Empire” and “Lost Highway.” True documents of New York, those movies.

 -3Posted on Aug 11th, 2009 | re: The NYC Prep Finale Drinking Game (44 comments)

Hilarious!

 +11Posted on Aug 4th, 2009 | re: The Gathering Of The Juggalos Survival Guide (66 comments)

That is a lot of rules. Good thing there’s going to be a lot of sex in the air or I might consider not going.

I like how best-selling is highlighted in red, as if to say: “yes, people actually purchased/read this book.”

 +11Posted on Aug 3rd, 2009 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Le Divorce (145 comments)

Maybe you would have enjoyed this movie more if you spent a lovely summer with a French family during your late teens/early 20s.

 +8Posted on Jul 31st, 2009 | re: Monsters' Ball: The Week's Best Comments (141 comments)

This is all because of that JP/Twilight mash-up isn’t it?

 +25Posted on Jul 31st, 2009 | re: Monsters' Ball: The Week's Best Comments (141 comments)

But how am I supposed to shamelessly up myself from every computer I come across and maintain the image that I am well-liked, clever member of the videogum family. Why, Gabe, why?!?!?

 +11Posted on Jul 29th, 2009 | re: NYC Prep: Fashion Week Is For Children (37 comments)

I’m starting a band called Living Nightmares of American Failure.

 +7Posted on Jul 28th, 2009 | re: Ha Ha Ha, WHAT? (23 comments)

Needs more alliteration…Milking Maguire

 +51Posted on Jul 23rd, 2009 | re: That's Your Girlfriend: Katherine Heigl (42 comments)

Or Katherine Heigl’s Really Awesome Blog Site (KHRABS)