Kate is fittingly dressed as a bag lady, so I guess this makes sense.

“…Plus, the sci-tech Oscars really are the most relevant…”–Andy Serkis, at a nomination-watching breakfast in his apartment

Seriously, Oscars. We need to talk about Tilda.

“I took the challenge really literally, so I’ve prepared a plate of poached dwarf turds with just a hint of a dead girl’s nail clippings”–Grayson

Diablo Cody’s script for Juno 2 is headed toward a really dark place…

Regarding #2, I wondered if it had to do with his somewhat sullied reputation as a patent troll. I thought his name sounded familiar (and not from a culinary context) and remembered that This American Life had done an entire show on what a horrible nightmare this guy has been for patent development and innovation. I’m assuming he’s patented everything in his cookbook, so sorry, chefs, ya’ll about to get sued.

Chris’ art is from the renowned 8th Grade Boys’ Bathroom Stall School.

In related Christmas list news, my 8-year-old niece placed “100 Slim Jims” at the top of her list this year.

Keep those puns coming, producers. Here’s mine: “Heather, you should be rendered unconscious. “