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SailorAlphaCentauri

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 0Posted on Aug 13th, 2008 | re: Dane Cook Confused About Why He Sucks (9 comments)

What’s worse? Dane Cook giving someone a reason to talk about his unfunny ass. That man sucks donkey dick and I wish he would choke on it. After seeing a preview of the film, this poster is the least of his problems.

 0Posted on Aug 7th, 2008 | re: I Want What The "Crazy Sprinkler Lady" Is Smoking (11 comments)

I want to know what crack this woman is smoking so that I can kill her dealer for making bad stuff.

 0Posted on Aug 7th, 2008 | re: I Want What The "Crazy Sprinkler Lady" Is Smoking (11 comments)

This has got to be the dumbest lady I’ve ever heard of, ever. She might qualify for someone who may need to have their rights taken away for her own safety.

Wow. People suck. There were people who thought Cheeky’s was real (or that the whole thing was real, for that matter)? How stupid can people get?

 0Posted on Aug 6th, 2008 | re: We Are All Weird Al Yankovic (8 comments)

I was being a little sarcastic about Crystal. I’ve actually heard of other parody artists who, while not in the same arena of fame as Weird Al, do make really great parodies that manage to get airplay on Dr. Demento’s show every week. Weird Al does do justice to all of his songs, but Luke Ski (along with some of the members of The Fump) can throw down with the best of them.

Wow, we must be around the same age because these videos are things I remember from those halcyon days of junior high and how huge these videos were back in the day.

 +1Posted on Aug 6th, 2008 | re: When You Wrestle With The Sexman, You're Going To Get Wet With Braces (9 comments)

I can’t really defend sexman because I find his videos annoying. But, at the same time, I wouldn’t make fun of his teeth (I had to wear braces twice, and my teeth weren’t nearly as bad as his). I do think it’s really stupid that people would make video responses making fun of his teeth, like there was nothing else worth commenting on, because those people come off looking like assholes.

 0Posted on Aug 6th, 2008 | re: Tell Them Diddy Said Burger King Is Open Late (4 comments)

See, the point has been made, but because I can get a better deal at Taco Hell in the wee hours of the morning (or just go to McDonalds since it’s 24-hours now), I won’t be eating at Burger Death. Diddy can suck it.

 +1Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: Roads? Where Ruby Tuesday Is Going They Don't Need Roads. (5 comments)

I watched the 3 pm video (I just happened to put on my headphones just as it was beginning on another tab) and it was so stupid! They blew up an O’Charley’s instead of the Ruby Tuesday. Talk about false advertising. It wasn’t even funny.

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: We Are All Weird Al Yankovic (8 comments)

Oh wow. So this is what was on two days after I turned three. That hair is killing me. And whatever happened to Crystal, the woman who did the parody on the two men who flew in the space shuttle? How did she miss the boat that Weird Al is still sailing along on?

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: Wine And Cheese The Vote (4 comments)

Considering that the absentee ballot application is not available online for Ohio voters, telling people that they can vote if they have a computer is kind of stupid. The form still has to be mailed in, and, get this: If you are voting from out of the country, your shit can be late and it will still count. Amazing.

That, and the girl who kept saying she was “born to vote Democrat” is a great way to piss off Republican absentee ballot voters.

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: Steve Guttenberg + Roller Skates + Disco = Awesome (3 comments)

I can’t believe that this was recorded by someone holding a camcorder. Awesome.

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: Pork Chop Sandwiches (4 comments)

Considering that I am not usually up on these things, how is it that I saw this back in 2006 and it is only just now getting picked up by everyone else?

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: What Illegal Drug Should Replace Stoner Comedies? (22 comments)

Considering that you can make a stoner film where nobody gets stoned (a la Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure), the whole “stoner film” trope is a bit tired.

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: Are There Ants Living In Your All-In-One Printer/Scanner System? (3 comments)

Well, that was more horrifying than I thought it would be.

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: Mary Kate Olsen Hates Having To Go To Jail (5 comments)

What could she possibly say that could get her prosecuted? Seriously, I can’t think of a thing that she could’ve done that could get her into any kind of trouble. And isn’t she almost richer than God? So what’s her worry? She’s got the money to keep her ass out of jail, so just tell them what you know, hon.

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: We Do Not Condone Batman-Related Sibling-On-Sibling Violence (3 comments)

I’m a younger sibling, and I totally feel this kid’s pain. Unfortunately, I also found it funny. Anyway, you would think there would be some repercussions for kicking your brother in the head, and not just posting it on the internet like it was cool.

 -1Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: Tropic Thunder's Simple Jack Website Went Bye-Bye (7 comments)

You have to ask? Of course it failed to reach people.

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: We Live In A Tweenotocracy (6 comments)

My old guy would be the man from the Good Humor commercials circa 1996. He’s probably old now (he wasn’t then), but it’s such a dated reference that I’m pretty sure no tween would get it.

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: Guess Jennifer Garner's Face's Secret Past (7 comments)

If Bob Dylan had tied up the model, it would’ve been the best commercial of all time!

 0Posted on Aug 5th, 2008 | re: Roads? Where Ruby Tuesday Is Going They Don't Need Roads. (5 comments)

I’ve never been to a Bennigan’s but Applebee’s is horrid and is the restaurant that has given children margarita mix instead of apple juice more than once.

 +1Posted on Jul 31st, 2008 | re: I Survived A Japanese Game Show: Someone Clean Andrew's Diaper (3 comments)

Where is my beautiful house?

Where is my beautiful wife?

Sorry, the repetition got the best of me and I wanted to play along.

 0Posted on Jul 31st, 2008 | re: Fergie To Stretch Her Talent Wide (3 comments)

Ha, ha!

Gross.

Just because you said Transformers sucked, I am more in love with this site that ever before. I’m not alone in that sentiment anymore! *tear*

 0Posted on Jul 30th, 2008 | re: Raising Awareness About The Environment One Egomaniac At A Time (3 comments)

What I failed to mention, however, is that the saying is not a common one. I just remember random crap because that’s how I roll.