Adam Brody’s writing career in this movie gives me hope for all my dreams of having a fake career. 1) Writing porn scripts? Is a thing? All right! 2) Staring at a computer periodically and moaning about your high school novel you never explain and yet everyone thinks sounds interesting, on account of how your shitty high school experience must have been very different from everyone else’s shitty one = success? 3) GINNIFER GOODWIN. I can do this too!

I’m kind of sorry I lobbied so long to get you to watch this, Gabe, but I know you’ll bounce back eventually.

“It’s like watching paint get kind of stressed out and argue with itself while it dries.”

Classic. Also, I need to dwell a little more on man-Ash and his man-(unironic; dude is gay) love for Michael. UNCOMFORTABLE, and only made more so by Michael’s grudgingly mortified thanks. You should develop that more, Bravo, though I know it’s hard when you only have so much time to fill with Mike Isabella listing synonyms for “angry” in regard to Robin’s existence.

Man, this made so much more sense when it was a reply to another comment.

What’s amazing about this is that on the seminal A&E “staged reality” show The Two Coreys, Corey Feldman appeared to be the much more functional and less your boyfriend Corey of the two. And by amazing I mean ugh what.

Brave vs. gross is a pretty weird and irrelevant false dichotomy, since one can be cowardly and truthful or gross and truthful or a brave gross not-getter of things. Rape is not just not brave and very gross, it is an act that denies the victim’s humanity and it is inexcusable. So yeah, I agree with tibmalian and Gabe and GOB Bluth.

Julie Klausner, you are the best recent Videogum expansion pack feature by far, and I mean that in a totally appreciative and not at all objectifying you in the manner of a video game way. This was awesome.

But to continue my reign of spelling terror: CourtEney Cox-Arquette, Jason SegEL. Es, people! Everywhere you don’t want to put them, there need to be some Es!