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A very important public service announcement reminding us women to get our implants replaced on time. She’s so socially responsible. I’ll add this reminder to my Outlook calendar for September 13, 20never.
“Sorry you got upset” … has NBC been getting conflict management pointers from my husband?
Why not just rerun the original ‘Heathers’ and call it a day?
The DJ at my wedding 2 years ago started playing that song during our “cocktail” hour and I had to rush over to shut that crap down. Not sure how he thought it fit into our requested list of mid 90s Britpop and 1950s crooners (to please the old folks, ya know).
I’m starting ours off early. She hasn’t made her debut into the world yet, but we’ve already got a TARDIS piggy bank for the nursery and I’m still looking for a fun print for the wall. “Bowties are cool” was my top pick if we were having a little boy.
Steven Moffat released three teaser words for the upcoming season of Sherlock: rat, wedding, bow. I’d try to think about which Sherlock Holmes stories these could refer to, but I’m too bored to really care.
… Too nerdy? Too nerdy. Doctor Who premiers soon! Dang, still too nerdy. Sorry, I got nothing.
Gin cannot help me this week as I’m currently incubating a child in my womb. So for me, it’s ice cream. Lots of ice cream. And thoughts of gin in three more months.
I feel the need to comment because I am so outraged, but I can’t put together anything more coherent or appropriate than this. So… sweet fanny fucksticks!
According to CNN, an aide noted that Romney “wasn’t using prepared remarks.” EVEN BETTER!
I am 7 months pregnant and have been craving ice cream daily for almost as long… UNTIL NOW. Thanks, I guess.
Coming soon: Whateverhisnameis from 50 Shades of Gray. Have you read the synopsis of those books? What a dick!
I was thinking the same thing.
Sorry to get all #personalgum, but I refuse to let anyone (especially someone named Kirk) tell me that my mother’s partner (stop the presses – a lesbian!) who has been my loving and supportive stepmom for half my life doesn’t love me and that I would have been better off had my mother stayed with my alcoholic, abusive father who kicked me out of the house when I was 19 or boycotted my wedding or told me I was doomed for failure or …
Pssh.
“I HAVE failed at the box office, I HAVE failed in my career…” #fixed
I could have sworn this other mother-of-the-year was her mom:
I think I’m probably in love with you.
Ohhh. I was about to post, “And who the eff is Chet Haze?”
Bleached hair, fake tan, dark eyeliner, bedazzled clothing… she has quite a strong southern accent for being a Jersey housewife.
No offense, I live in Jersey.
Oh fuck this guy who has never had to struggle a day in his life. Sorry to get all Personalgum but my husband, who has an associates degree, has been looking for work for months. He doesn’t consider his unemployment a “free ride”… he has applied to hundreds of jobs (including those out of state), taken on crappy freelancing opportunities, called temp agencies who don’t return his calls because they don’t have any work. Sure, he might be able to get a minimum wage job at Target, but then we wouldn’t be able to pay our mortgage. I’d like to declare independence from assholes like Newt Gingrich who are so far away from real people problems yet think they are qualified to tell us how to live.
I’m disappointed in our country that a person like this can even make it so far in a serious election. I used to find his idiocy laughable, now I find it terrifying that PEOPLE ARE ACTUALLY VOTING FOR HIM.
#therock4presidenteventually
Shoot, accidentally downvote! I totally meant to upvote! I’m sorry 
I liked the one about John Carter because shirtless Tim Riggins.
I did not know that! My ‘hoorays’ increased ten fold!
Hilarious, but also disconcerting that the crowd is so eager to chant Ryan’s name. That guy scares the crap out of me more so than Romneybot.