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principal enchman
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 +27Posted on Feb 7th | re: Heaven Just Got A Little More Videogum (276 comments)

I haven’t commented in some time but I just wanted to drop by and say that I’m incredibly grateful for this community. I’ve made a lot of friends through this website, directly and tangentially, online and IRL, and I can’t imagine my life without those people. So thanks for the laughs, thanks for the memories, thanks for the friends.

 +5Posted on Aug 3rd, 2013 | re: This Is Just A Goodbye Post (241 comments)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5t-CmCwhZo

 +9Posted on Aug 3rd, 2013 | re: This Is Just A Goodbye Post (241 comments)

I haven’t been here in a while but I want to thank Gabe for writing some really funny stuff (especially about LOST) and creating a space for really funny, warm, smart people. I’ve made some really good, lasting e-relationships (electronic relationships) through this site that have, over the years, turned into IRL (“in real life”) friendships, and for that I am ever grateful (full of greatness). Good luck, Gabe. Good luck, Monsters. “See you in another life*, brother.”-Desmond, from the hit ABC drama LOST.

*Twitter

 +5Posted on Aug 3rd, 2013 | re: This Is Just A Goodbye Post (241 comments)

same

 +6Posted on Mar 1st, 2012 | re: Top Chef S09E16: Season Finale (40 comments)

The Top Chef recaps are going to join the Lost recaps and the Glee-caps in Recap Heaven. Amen.

 +4Posted on Mar 1st, 2012 | re: Top Chef S09E16: Season Finale (40 comments)

This is the second season in a row that I’ve only watched intermittently after being a devout (LOL) fan for the first 123 years of the show’s existence. What I’m trying to say is that, like Gabe, I think I’m done with this show.

 +1Posted on Feb 26th, 2012 | re: The 2012 Academy Awards Videogum Video Pizza Party (392 comments)

GROOOOOOOAN

 +1Posted on Feb 26th, 2012 | re: The 2012 Academy Awards Videogum Video Pizza Party (392 comments)

Guys, I’m stuck on the toilet. Who won best picture?

 +12Posted on Feb 26th, 2012 | re: The 2012 Academy Awards Videogum Video Pizza Party (392 comments)

Hi guys. I’m constipated.

 +3Posted on Feb 2nd, 2012 | re: Our Generation's Cast Of Downton Abbey (13 comments)

Heh “Nuttall” heh

 +13Posted on Dec 30th, 2011 | re: The Best People Of 2011 (51 comments)

I nominate this guy for basically ensuring that Obama will win reelection.

 +6Posted on Nov 28th, 2011 | re: Duh Aficionado Magazine: Charlize Theron Was NOT Bullied In School (66 comments)

A while ago Gabe wrote a recap of Mad Men (I think?) from the perspective of a little boy and it was actually TBS very funny.

 +25Posted on Nov 28th, 2011 | re: Duh Aficionado Magazine: Charlize Theron Was NOT Bullied In School (66 comments)

Oh Gabe, you’re such a pussy.

 +4Posted on Nov 28th, 2011 | re: Yogurt Baby Needs More Yogurt (19 comments)

Needs more yogurt.

 +4Posted on Nov 2nd, 2011 | re: Ann Coulter Should Have Rested Her Garbage Case About Black People! (83 comments)

I’m only racist against the breed of half-human/half-horse people that produced Ann Coulter.

 +9Posted on Nov 2nd, 2011 | re: The Petting Zoo: The Week's Top 10 Animal Videos (14 comments)

In regards to the snapping turtle:


“Meh.”

“You hear about this? Yeah, apparently Ashton Kutcher is going to replace Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men. Something something America is going to get Punk’d something something.”-–Leno, probably

Grandma be trippin’!

Two and a Half Men: propagating the myth that Ashton Kutcher is attractive since 2011

Your parents watch this show. A show that consists mostly of crass sex jokes. Now let that sink in for a bit.

 +17Posted on Sep 20th, 2011 | re: Let's Name Snoop Dogg's Sitcom! (67 comments)

How I Met Your Mothers

 +2Posted on Sep 13th, 2011 | re: Let's All Enter This Bill Murray Poetry Contest (38 comments)

What did you whisper in her little ear?
What profound thought or feeling did you say?
On that busy street, did you say goodbye?
If I said I didn’t care, I would lie.

That one! little furry pain-in-the-ass,
Coming to and fro, destroying the grass.
You mutter and you whisper and wait–
No quarter, no respect–only hate.

Back and forth you oscillate, returning
To the same time and place, again, again.
Another rodent torments and haunts you.
Another world where life endlessly taunts you.

And all we do is watch, we the spectators
And continue to when we are specters.

Shakespearian sonnet ftw

 +11Posted on Sep 9th, 2011 | re: Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments (46 comments)

This is actually the end of my THIRD week of school (hard times, I know), but I am excited for this weekend. I am going to see Fleet Foxes tomorrow and I hope I can get Robin Pecknold to sign my man boobs! I think this .gif accurately expresses my current state of mind:

 +4Posted on Sep 7th, 2011 | re: Great New Katherine Chloe Cahoon Video! (79 comments)

Man, am I clever or what?