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Narrowstrife

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 +13Posted on May 21st, 2012 | re: Dan Harmon Replaced As Community Show Runner (83 comments)

Probably for the best?! PROBABLY FOR THE BEST?!?!? What is WRONG with you people!??

 +10Posted on May 4th, 2012 | re: Thursday Night TV Open Thread (56 comments)

I’m not worried, cause I think this season has been amazing. I don’t really understand the season 3 hate – yes, a couple of post-hiatus episodes have been average, but no worse than some from previous years. (I’d rank Celebrity Impressions over Art of Discourse or Wine Tasting, for instance.)

Virtual Systems Analysis was one of the best episodes I’ve ever seen of anything.

 +25Posted on Oct 6th, 2011 | re: Heaven Just Got A Little More Steve Jobs (68 comments)

Is Boing Boing a trampoline accident site?

 +10Posted on Feb 28th, 2011 | re: The 2011 Academy Awards (127 comments)

What I /did/ find insufferable was the Best Picture montage where they edited all the films together to Beethoven, taking all of those scenes completely out of context. Do they do that every year? Cause they should stop! Decontextualization is an extremely dangerous phenomenon in the 21st century! There were 40 tons of shrimp on that boat! Rabbit hats!

 +10Posted on Feb 28th, 2011 | re: The 2011 Academy Awards (127 comments)

So I guess I’m the only one who thought Anne Hathaway was delightful? Oh well, one man’s delightful is another man’s insufferable.

 +19Posted on Sep 29th, 2010 | re: That's Your Boyfriend: Andrew Shirvell (147 comments)

I think America would be much more accepting of us gays if instead of LGBT it was BLGT and it stood for Bacon, Lettuce, and Green Tomato, because that’s what I had for lunch and it was delicious.

 +22Posted on Sep 14th, 2010 | re: One Lord Of The Rings Trilogy Blu Ray DVD Giveaway To Rule Them Ugh (221 comments)

“Sorry we’re so late, our travel candle went out around exit 90, so we had to pull over, enter a videogum giveaway contest, wait for our new travel candle to arrive, and then walk to the gas station to buy a lighter because Seth refuses to carry one because he’s trying to quit smoking. But in order to make it up to you, here’s a jade necklace in the shape of New Zealand. It could also pass for Japan if you melted it a little.”
- Everyone, at some point in their lives

 +8Posted on Jul 14th, 2010 | re: Hey, What's Up With Topher Grace? (48 comments)

Topher: I need more baby powder for my moist hands.
Photographer Jerry: Hey my new camera can shoot video too!
Topher: I have to go now.

And scene.

50 Cent: Get me Philip Seymour Hoffman!
Smithers: He’s unavailable.
50 Cent: Then get me his non-union Mexican equivalent – Philip SeƱor Hoffman!

 +32Posted on May 13th, 2010 | re: That's Your Boyfriend: Caleb Howe (104 comments)

My problem with the teabaggers is that they don’t know nearly enough about tea. You’d think if they spent all that time bagging tea they’d at least be able to recommend a nice chamomile, but all I ever get is blank stares and racist pamphlets.

“Give me liberTEA or give me, just the TEA!” – what their slogan should be

 +12Posted on May 12th, 2010 | re: The Adjustment Bureau Looks Adjustment BORINGEAU! (Sorry) (69 comments)

Narrowstrife would like it, but the magic Trapper Keeper of the future said Narrowstrife had to not like it, or else the red line would point to a slightly incorrect spot and he wouldn’t become a ballerina politician like the plan said he would.

 +13Posted on May 12th, 2010 | re: The Adjustment Bureau Looks Adjustment BORINGEAU! (Sorry) (69 comments)

That One doesn’t like Gabe not liking things.

 +9Posted on Oct 27th, 2009 | re: Duh Aficionado Magazine: Chris Brown Can Transform Ya, Ladies (31 comments)

This is the freshest Gap commercial yet.

Best part is the lady noodle-morphing back into herself except on a motorcycle.

 +3Posted on Aug 11th, 2009 | re: Party! Pizza Party! Video Pizza Party! (75 comments)

Is Sizzling the name of the Mega Man 2 boss themes cover band they go to do the soundtrack?

It’s either that, or the sound of food cooking has always been like Yellow Magic Orchestra-lite, and I’ve just had my oven on mute.

 +2Posted on Jul 22nd, 2009 | re: Tim Burton's Alice In Wonderland Looks As Unnecessary As It Does Neat (101 comments)

(Sigh, this should’ve been a reply to my previous comment. Checkboxes are just too WEB2.0 for me I guess.)

 +2Posted on Jul 22nd, 2009 | re: Tim Burton's Alice In Wonderland Looks As Unnecessary As It Does Neat (101 comments)

It was! And I am!
And I used to review films for my high school newsletter, so I really know what I’m talking about!

(I mean, it’s no Scenes From a Marriage or Spy Kids, but what film is?)

 +4Posted on Jul 22nd, 2009 | re: Tim Burton's Alice In Wonderland Looks As Unnecessary As It Does Neat (101 comments)

Mr. Burton has probably been sticking to such recognizable properties because it makes it easier for him to convince Disney to pay for his massive army of Art Directors. (Also to pay for his girlfriend’s head implants, apparently.)

While I’d prefer a bit more original material, he usually manages to put enough of an interesting twist on things to make them worthwhile. Sweeny Todd was good, at least.

 +6Posted on Jul 21st, 2009 | re: Tyler Perry Can And Does Do Bad All By Himself (24 comments)

I thought I was America’s favorite pistol-packing man dressed as a grandma!

I mean, I certainly seemed popular enough when that large crowd gathered around me at the mall. Can’t a man dress up as a grandma and take his guns shopping in peace?

 +2Posted on Jul 20th, 2009 | re: Let's "Stir Fry Up" A Name For Padma Lakshmi's Sitcom (58 comments)

It’s Always Sunny in Philly Cheese Steaks
Frigidaires and Derrieres
Pot Chef (Tagline: “Preheat your oven to 420 and get baked for 30 minutes!” )

 +80Posted on Jul 17th, 2009 | re: Monsters' Ball: The Week's Best Comments (63 comments)

You know the diamond studs are supposed to go on the outside, right? And the baby seal skin goes on the inside. Do that and your diamond shoes will never feel too tight!

Sigh, new money. They’re always encrusting the wrong side of things with diamonds.