Website: -
Find Me On: twitter

Latest Comments


 +22Posted on Feb 3rd, 2014 | re: Hey Guys, We Have To Talk To You About Something (353 comments)

RIP VG. What a bummer. Thanks for all of the laughs and excellent writing over the years. And the rad friendships with Monsters. ~ a lurker

 +7Posted on Feb 3rd, 2014 | re: Hey Guys, We Have To Talk To You About Something (353 comments)

Team Stereogum.

 +1Posted on May 24th, 2013 | re: How To Succeed With Brunettes (53 comments)

Being someone who gets colds easily – if I could trust that dudes wash their hands after using the toilet – WHICH THEY DON’T – then it wouldn’t gross me out to have to shake hands with dudes. And yeah, if you’re going to offer a handshake, a limp dick handshanke is a turn off.

 +3Posted on May 13th, 2013 | re: Astronaut Chris Hadfield Reflects On His Life (19 comments)

I’d do him… IN SPACE.

 0Posted on May 7th, 2013 | re: The Internet Is A Sociopath (38 comments)

Autotune is so 2009. Where’s the dubstep remix?

 +3Posted on Mar 6th, 2013 | re: How Was Everyone's Day Today? (90 comments)

Cougar Town rules! Penny can!

 +8Posted on Feb 25th, 2013 | re: Dear Comedy, Just So You Know, You Are Allowed To Apologize (126 comments)

I know no one’s going to see this comment, because I always view these discussions late. However, the “joke” happened in the context of the USA, not in the UK, which makes all the difference. Hence, in the American context: ‘cunt’ is the most degrading, violent, and hateful word to say to a woman.

A few years ago, I was dating a dude who ended up being the most abusive and dishonest dude I ever dated. I remember that he’d call me a ‘cunt’ when intending to hurt me the most – and it most certainly did hurt like hell that someone who was supposed to love and respect me repeatedly did otherwise by the cheap use of this word during our arguments – which were usually about his lies. It was like calling me ‘cunt’ was not only the most sexist insult, but a convenient and manipulative distraction from his lie(s) I would be trying to approach him about – of which for he could never be wrong, nor ever apologize. Sorry for sharing this anecdote.

Gabe mentioned that someone who never apologizes is a sociopath. I respect that The Onion apologized, and did so in a timely manner.

 +1Posted on Feb 22nd, 2013 | re: I Know It's Friday, But Please Be Careful With Your Hairdo (30 comments)

This vid made me LOL so hard. I guess it was the combo of high heat, thin hair, and hair product. She took it well. I kept waiting for her to show us the curling iron with her now burnt off hair wrapped around it… and she was a good enough sport to remember to show it to the camera in the end.

 +5Posted on Feb 20th, 2013 | re: Actual Residents Of Harlem Respond To "Harlem Shake" Meme (66 comments)

Unfortunately, most Americans have not studied post-colonial theories, so cultural appropriation is not within their vocabularies. Also, re: Asian-themed frat parties and Native-American headdresses – whenever I see a white dude dressed as a desert Arab for Halloween, I just wanna suicide bomb his racist/ignorant white-privileged ass. I remember a professor in grad school used to point out regarding U.S. foreign policy: “The Romans never asked, ‘Why do they hate us?’”

 +2Posted on Feb 11th, 2013 | re: Courtney Stodden Goes Shopping With Her Dad (52 comments)

Totally. Hollywood Blvd *is* where all of the stripper shoe shops are, after all. I don’t think lucite platform heals were meant for pounding concrete, although the shoe designer Jeffery Cambell probably disagrees as all of his platforms seem to be made with lucite heels nowadays.

 +2Posted on Feb 7th, 2013 | re: John Didn't Eat The Sprinkles, Mom! Lay off! (26 comments)


 +3Posted on Feb 7th, 2013 | re: Jeopardy! Makes Desperate Bid For Infinite ReTumbls (14 comments)

You totally rule, dude.

 0Posted on Feb 7th, 2013 | re: Walter White Cat Means We're At Least Done For TODAY, Right? (30 comments)

Awesome. Sounds like my kind of birthday.

 +2Posted on Jan 29th, 2013 | re: Russel Brand Staged A Walkout At A Yoga Studio Because Huh? (31 comments)

Whoah, dude. Tej is a good master yoga teacher and has taught at this studio since it’s inception however many decades ago. Trippy that she quit. I guess spiritual hippy fascists are not without their own drama! Bummer. And, uh, may the [yoga] force be with you!

 +2Posted on Jan 10th, 2013 | re: Are You America's Next Top Space Bachelor? (32 comments)

Philip K. Dick really missed the mark about Mars colonization actually being instigated via frickin’ reality TV shows rather than the result of the destruction of planet Earth.

 +4Posted on Jan 9th, 2013 | re: Duh Aficionado Magazine: Garrett Hedlund Is Not A Writer (30 comments)

I had a poem published in a literary/art journal about nine years ago – and got paid for it! I re-read it recently and it’s completely fucking terrible! It’s awful. I’m so embarrassed. I can’t believe I ever thought I was a poet. Fuckin’ A.

 +2Posted on Dec 13th, 2012 | re: A Quick Lesson In Headbutting (20 comments)

You’re such a haole to the max.

 +1Posted on Dec 13th, 2012 | re: The 2013 Golden Globe Nominations (57 comments)

I’m also hopeful about the Tarantino film.

 0Posted on Dec 13th, 2012 | re: The 2013 Golden Globe Nominations (57 comments)

Yeah, I remember my former students recommended Big Bang Theory to me… I couldn’t get past one episode.

 +1Posted on Dec 13th, 2012 | re: What The Fuck, Matt Lauer? (118 comments)

Good point.

 0Posted on Dec 13th, 2012 | re: What The Fuck, Matt Lauer? (118 comments)

Lol. Agreed. :(

 0Posted on Dec 12th, 2012 | re: What The Fuck, Matt Lauer? (118 comments)

I agree that there is a huge difference between the intentional and unintentional commodification of sex and that Anne Hathaway was NOT a wiling participant in this case. But, the cynical part of me also wonders if she truly never considered the risk she was taking in light of the fact that pervert paparazzi would most likely be awaiting and photographing her from all angles – considering it’s happened a half dozen times with other female celebrities who chose to go sans underwear? However, I also hate that my question inadvertently also relates to the sexist notion in rape culture: “She deserved it because of what she was (or was not) wearing.” Ugh. I’m just going to go back to lurking…

This is only kosher if he and Angie give back each other’s blood vial necklaces beforehand. Angie should then give her blood necklace to Brad now, obviously.

 +2Posted on Dec 4th, 2012 | re: Today Our Hearts Are With Anderson Cooper's Eyeballs (39 comments)

TWSS! Seriously, I was thinking the same thing. Ew! I wish Michonne had caused more than just eyeball damage to that dude…

 +3Posted on Nov 30th, 2012 | re: How Was Everyone's Day Today? (175 comments)

I’m down for Thirsty Crow again and an after-party at my place again (walking distance from Thirsty Crow) if ya’ll want to. However, you can’t be spilling beer on my rug again. ;)