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Why can’t I be smart? The people who are just like me are always people who don’t know any recent supreme court decisions or republican senators, or people who don’t know what the word “German” means. No one ever says, “the great thing about Chebyshev was that he was just like us!”
I haven’t posted in a few weeks (college! so much dancing and paper-writing) but I wanted to definitely come back for the return of 30 Rock and this shit right here. OH MY GOD. I have 2 Indian professors right now who are vying for the position of most intelligent person in my life, and this back asswards portrayal of Indians makes me want to vomit. I watched this show haphazardly making fun of it with some of my friends, until the Indian co-manager said that one of the employees was easily fireable because she was of a lower caste. I’m not embarrassed to be an American by this show, I’m embarrassed to be a human being.
I didn’t really get that one either, where did that one come from? It didn’t feel like a 30 Rock joke at all. I feel like it must be operating on a totally different level that I’m not getting, because its not a good sight gag or anything like that. It’s the same feeling I get when I read The Scarlet Letter, I mean I just KNOW something is going on with that “A”.
“I see the boys of summer in their ruin,
laughing at friends right?
I mean one has definitely broken her nose.”
-Dylan Thomas
This is like finding out that Santa Claus is a genial figure intended to engender good will while ultimately normalizing and encouraging consumerist impulses, but this one’s worse because it’s real!
This guy has done the same stuff with Glenn Beck’s 9/12 rally, Sarah Palin’s book signing, and protests against gay marriage. I’m not trying to give him a plug here but… the others also prominently feature bizarrely misinformed racists, so its funny. if you’re into that sort of thing.
This thing has the smell of success I think. It’ll be like Kid’s Bop, but with Bell towers:
Rihanna’s “Umbrella”
Ding ding ding ding ding ding,
ding ding ding ding ding ding ding,
diiingg dddiiiinnggg diiiinnnggg
ding ding ding
People love the sounds of bell towers right? That’s what everyone can agree on?
I watched Human Centipede last night with my roommates (back at college guys, what did you want us to do study?) and I feel like this movie has the same basic problem. You have an interesting idea: what if you had to cut off your own arm? Then its just sort of about that idea for 2 hours. “Oh man do you see this guy? Has to cut off his own arm. Are you gonna be able to watch? What would you do? Oh we’re getting close, he’s really gonna pull the trigger on this one.” This is gonna be exactly like Human Centipede.
This was my first time in the top 5, which I was excited about until I tried explaining it to my brother:
“Yeah it’s this internet commenting thing, see like every week 5 people are chosen, so its not like permanent or anything and actually there’s a pretty healthy rotation in and out of the top 5, but anyways I didn’t win it but did get 4th soo…… well no its not actually a big deal in my life necessarily i just thought it was fun… yeah I know you were district champion in high school, but thats not even the point here…”
The part with the light dimmer was buck wild! If I was high and watched that it would’ve broken my mind in half. When crazy lights jump across the screen, the words pop out of the screen, the woman watches HERSELF advertising the product?
oh man, its all in the lyrics, that’s where it’s timeless. “I see you walkin down that road, that lonely road that you have walked… Slowly slipping into addiction, my god that is so o non-fiction!”
So this guy walks into the doctor’s office, he says “I’m a wigwam, I’m a teepee, I’m a wigwam, I’m a teepee,” and the Doctor says “relax you’re two/too tents/tense.”
that joke doesn’t really work written out because its all about the sound of those words.
That was my dad’s favorite joke to tell us when we were kids, and we didn’t even know what wigwams were.
Oh man, I’m pretty excited I get to drop this link. I still laugh when I listen to this.
http://www.myspace.com/peytonjenkins
This is the myspace of a musician named peyton jenkins, a kid out of orlando. go to the second song, “The Hardest Conversation”. It is still one of my favorite things on the internet.
My friend showed me Tim and Eric a couple of years ago and told me it was the future of comedy, and I was like, “whatever, too fringe. Rare miss friend.” But now its sort of becoming true I guess.
I have very mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, I would much rather watch K-swiss commercials that star Kenny Powers, or Orbitz commercials with Jason Bateman and Will Arnett, or Old Spice commercials directed by Tim and Eric. They are created by or directly involve people that I really admire, which I like for two reasons: even poorly thought out ideas by these people are usually better than most ideas in advertising, and I like to think of the talented people in the world making money basically just for being talented.
But I also worry that we’ll reach a saturation point for absurdist, internet-driven humor, especially when the creation process is taken out of capable hands. That commercial didn’t really hit because I just didn’t think the writing was that funny. Just because something’s bizarre doesn’t mean it’s good. Plus, I didn’t know that was a vitamin water commercial until the very end, which sounds like something I would’ve loved in middle school.
Hollywood fatcats, always trying to change the plot of our beloved literature just to appeal to the casual fan. I am so sick and tired of owl release and return scenes being fudged into movies just to bring in the owl fan demographic.
Probably The Expendables, what with its redemptive thematic elements and commentary on apartheid.
Love and Other Drugs: Revenge of the Fallen
“We tried to be decent men, in an indecent time!… and it worked out actually, mission accomplished I’d say.”
-All Involved
Look, this is just Alvin Greene again painstakingly showing us what old-fashioned campaigning really is. Who can forget George Washington’s campaign platform of “NOOOOOOOOO!!!!”, or when Lincoln emerged from the Lincoln-Douglas debates with his triumphant testament, “GOOOO AWWWWWAAAAY!!!!!!!”
I just wish I could get excited about anything in my life like this guy gets excited every single moment he is playing this game. I think all of my dreams could come true simultaneously and I’d be about a 3 out of 10 comparatively.
She keeps performing, which just baffles me. What part of the crowd that was sort of nodding their head and looking disapprovingly at everyone else was she pandering to? If one person in a crowd of thousands hits you with a rock but everyone’s still cheering, go Justin Bieber and play like you meant to get hit with something, but maybe don’t yell to a crowd of people that you’re trying to entertain that you “DON’T GIVE A FUCK” that they’re booing ferociously and hitting you with things. It’s like stonemill said, just go ahead and bounce, you’re not going to turn a crowd that has devolved into throwing piles of shit at you.
The London Symphony Orchestra came and played in my city and I put a rock through a cello, but to be fair Sir Colin Davis’ interpretation of Tchaikovsky was downright unsavory. So this could happen at any concert really.
I’ve been trying to get an airline off the ground where you could pay $10 extra dollars to ensure that a baby would not be on the airplane, because I haven’t talked to someone yet who hasn’t felt like a prisoner of war after a 5 hour flight with a screaming baby.
Oh man, I’ve stopped the video at 4 minutes, and its not even halfway done! How does this keep going?
How I feel about 500 Days of Summer is grounded in the circumstances that I first saw it. I was in the middle of the worst summer of my life, working a job 60 hours a week and just miserable all around. Then my brother and I went and saw it and it just felt great. The dancing scene in particular means a lot to me actually: it reminded me of what it felt like to be REALLY happy. I didn’t go in knowing anything about the movie and I was really charmed. I think you got really stiffed if you had somebody tell you it was going to be great, because that’s a strange frame of mind to go into the movie with I think. tl;dr you had to be really sad to enjoy this movie a lot.