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 +36Posted on Feb 7th | re: Heaven Just Got A Little More Videogum (278 comments)

First!

 +35Posted on Feb 6th | re: David Blaine: Electrified: One Million Questions Always What? (55 comments)

Wow. I don’t work on Fridays, which means I got real shit to do and won’t be commenting. So, I guess this is it for me. It’s been a trip, you guys.

As sad as I am to see this stupid site that means an awful lot to me disappear, it feels like the right time, at least on a personal level. Only a month into 2014, and this is already the year that I basically have to become an adult, with adult problems. No time for video games and drinking flavored booze straight from the bottle; I’ve got to deal with real-world stuff, like foreclosures, leaky roofs, and the failing health of my rapidly aging body. No vacation this year, gonna use that money for real long-term investments instead. Psych was cancelled and I started watching True Detective. All the grownup shit is taking over all of the fun things I enjoy. I can’t say I’m THRILLED with this development, but hell, we all grow old, might as well learn to accept it. Today, my last day of posting on Videogum, I finally got my business cards for this position that I started over a year ago. I’m a real adult human being now. It makes sense for this site to go away, for me at least. The rest of you are just getting screwed, I guess.

But, you know, that’s life. We still have Facebook and Cerealprize and whatever other fabulous sites there are out there to replace this one. But it’ll never be the same. This place has honest-to-god memories for a lot of us, including me. And knowing that it’s over…it’s a bummer, but I think I’ve started to come to terms with it. It’s been a blast. Everybody stay wonderful.

Miss Conaboychev, tear down this blog!

 +25Posted on Feb 6th | re: David Blaine: Electrified: One Million Questions Always What? (55 comments)

This shirt is bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

 +6Posted on Feb 6th | re: A Refuge For Homeless Monsters (34 comments)

Speaking of Boston, I referred to this annoying person who goes to a bar I frequent as Cliff Clavin the other day, and the bartender did not get the reference! The fuck kinda bartender doesn’t get Cheers references?!

 +12Posted on Feb 6th | re: You Can Make It Up: Kevin Bacon Wears A Mask To The Store (6 comments)

You Can Make It Up: Kelly was just joking about this whole thing and Videogum will go on forever.

 +12Posted on Feb 6th | re: How Is Everyone's Day Today? (146 comments)

NERD ALERT!

Just kidding Packy, don’t leave us!

 +11Posted on Feb 6th | re: How Is Everyone's Day Today? (146 comments)

As I mentioned on Facebook, there is an account called TophersProudMom that posted 8 days ago, well before the site was launched, which is definitely Topher Grace. He made a fake trolling account on his own website that nobody else could see.

 +18Posted on Feb 6th | re: How Is Everyone's Day Today? (146 comments)

I had the worst day yesterday, including a leaky ceiling at home AND at work, and approximately 100,000 pieces of mail missing. It was so stressful that now I’m peeing blood, and I’m getting concerned because it’s way more than the usual amount of blood in my pee. I have a doctor appointment, but I guess NONE OF YOU WILL EVER KNOW THE RESULTS. Way to go out on a cliffhanger, I suppose.

 +12Posted on Feb 6th | re: How Is Everyone's Day Today? (146 comments)

Umm, it’s Cereal PRIZE, and I already tested the waters with a comment. Topher replied! He’s very welcoming!

 +8Posted on Feb 5th | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: American Beauty (43 comments)

I love how the angry comments were still appearing as recently as 6 months ago.

 +13Posted on Feb 5th | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: American Beauty (43 comments)

Four Legs Good, No Videogum Better.

 +8Posted on Feb 5th | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: American Beauty (43 comments)

That was you? Thank you for that! I saw that movie once when I was a child, and the memory of it has haunted me to this day, but I never actually knew what movie it was until I read that. I couldn’t have been older than 7; I just remember those garbage monster twin things playing cards or something? I don’t know, but they fucking terrified me.

I had a similar experience with the music video for Tom Petty’s “Don’t Come Around Here No More.” Freaked the shit outta me, and I didn’t even know what song it was for until years later. I never forgot that fucking video, though.

 +10Posted on Feb 5th | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: American Beauty (43 comments)

When the question is which font to use, the answer is ALWAYS wingdings.

 +25Posted on Feb 5th | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: American Beauty (43 comments)

NOT GOOD!

Ugh. You guys, every time I think I’m over this, I’m just fucking not. I was spreading Nutella on my crepes this morning and I damn near lost it. It’s stupid to attach so much meaning to a website, but this place has been kinda important to me over the years. I’ve made friends here, both the real physical kind and the fake internet kind!

 +16Posted on Feb 5th | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: American Beauty (43 comments)

No How Was Everyone’s Day Today? I NEED MY HOW WAS EVERYONE’S DAY TODAY!

 +10Posted on Feb 5th | re: Is Famke Janssen Haunted By A Book Ghost?! (15 comments)

I can sympathize; when I heard the news, I immediately ran into the arms of a prostitute, and wound up with a heavy dose of the clap. Basically the same problem.

 +14Posted on Feb 5th | re: Is Famke Janssen Haunted By A Book Ghost?! (15 comments)

This is great, but it also hits a little too close to home, because I am no joke haunted by a Teddy Ruxpin. I had it for some reason, and since it’s creepy as shit I decided to trash it when I moved to Michigan. But when I unpacked, THERE IT WAS. Threw it away (again) and thought no more of it until 2 years later when I went to find stuff for a garage sale, and the fucking thing was just chillin’ in my garage. Nobody wanted to buy it, and now I don’t want to anger it, so it’s still being stored in the back of the garage. Clearly, he has made that his lair.

This is where I got my first Monsters Ball entry! What a bittersweet symphony!

Remember when Kelly robbed a convenience store dressed as Gumby?

Remember when Kelly murdered Rosie Larsen?

Remember even further back than that, when everybody was calling her Gabe all the time? Good stuff.

I don’t understand why they didn’t cast the Goopster in the Eat Pray Love movie. She would have been phenomenal.

It’s okay to love terrible movies. Everything Gabe said about Southland Tales was 1,000% correct, but that doesn’t make it any less fantastic.

 +7Posted on Feb 4th | re: Downton Abbey S01E01: All's Bates That Ends Bates (19 comments)

I’m sorry, but I could not possibly be less interested in this show. Like, AT ALL. Everybody says it’s very good, and Lord knows I’ve tried to bring myself to watch it, but there is just no way in any sort of hell that my brain will let me be interested in a bunch of stuffy old British farts.

 +7Posted on Feb 4th | re: BREAKING: AL ROKER POOPED HIS PANTS AT THE WHITE HOUSE (12 comments)

Ashleigh, I am fully approving this new profile of yours. Since Facebook is blocked at work, whenever you posted before I always got a big box that told me it was blocked and fucked up the formatting on the page. So thanks for that.