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Chris Braak
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I looked this picture up on a lark, but now I kind of can’t stop staring at it.
Yeah, hahah, back in the day James Bond was just a lumpy old potato. Played by Sean Connery.
Guardians of the Galaxy is pretty fun, though, and it DOES answer the question about where the Avengers are going to go next. That Spoilery guy at the end, he’s a pretty famous comic book villain who mostly hangs out in space and tries to destroy the universe with huge space plans, and it just seems completely bizarre that the Avengers are going to go from “Protecting the world from aliens” right on to, “Let’s all go into space and hang out with the Silver Surfer and guys like that!”
I mean. What? What is happening here? So, I guess Guardians of the Galaxy could lead into that. But otherwise, I agree with capsulekei. Some people who didn’t have any trouble buying Iron Man are going to get thrown for a loop with Rocket Raccoon and Groot.
In Soviet Russia, SCREAMS can’t hear YOU!
I think that history has shown that Damon Lindelof has not learned anything, ever.
What’s crazy is that you didn’t need that at all, since we knew that David was communicating with Weyland in real time, and however many lightyears from Earth would make that impossible.
Also, I don’t know if anyone has asked this yet, but if not, can I just get a verdict on what the deal is with the Emergency Procedures for the Prometheus? Is it the case that there is a special life pod escape capsule that, in an emergency, automatically detaches itself whether or not you are in it, and you have to get into a rocket and shoot yourself at it and hope that you find it? Is that actually what happened there?
I will upvote that, well done. Maybe they are all in the same universe?
This movie is the most compelling when you stop thinking of it as the prequel to Alien, and start thinking of it as the prequel to Metroid.
No, booo! “Most mad”, not “most made.” Who am I, even, to go around criticising other people’s writing? Maybe that speech was just a comment that they wrote on a message board, and it went to film before they thought to edit it.
I think I was most made about the part where she gives an inspirational speech and it is literally gibberish. I actually kind of thought at first that she was still confused from being in a coma, and that maybe she just needed a kind of a running start to get to the sense? But, nope!
“Iron melts in the fire! And when I opened my eyes, I saw the brightest light I’d ever seen, and it was the same as the light that is in your hearts, and I will be the iron that is forged in the fire of your hearts. Who will be my brother!?!?”
What? What are you actually talking about, Snow White?
(All of which is to say, the problem with this movie is that it was very, very badly written, which is why no amount of switching out actors could have possibly saved it.)
The best part of BRANDED is that tiny “Yahoo! Movies” logo in the corner the whole time.
I guess if someone is going to be an unrepentant sociopath, it’s probably better that they are also as dumb as dumb can possibly be.
It is a miniseries providing the missing link between the last season of Lost and the remake of Fantasy Island.
Malcom MacDowell is Hurley after he gets hit with some electromagnetism or something.
I would be more inclined towards Ruby Sparks if they had just knuckled-up and called it “Manic Pixie Dream Girl: The Movie.”
I think the shocking element of this story is that people are still hiring Joe Eszterhaz to write screenplays for them.
What is the reasoning behind that, I wonder?
“Well, the script will be completely terrible, but at least we’ll have ANOTHER asshole working on this picture.”
Hahaha, I don’t know how to do anything. You have to imagine that I just put up a picture of Fairuza Balk just going completely nuts on Skeet Ulrich.
Hahah, “All the street signs are written in squiggly lines.”
They are called LETTERS, you fucking dummy.
Also, Marylin Monroe, man, what a good quote. “If I’d followed all the rules, I’d never have got anywhere. Also, maybe I would have lived to see 37? It’s a toss-up, I guess; I believe in seizing life by the barbiturates.”
You know, I said it as a joke (“What’s the most ridiculous thing in their catalog that Disney could possibly rebeoot?”), but now that I think about it, a Darby O’Gill reboot actually is probably a pretty good idea.
(Incidentally: I also paid $0 tickets for John Carter, instead I got free advance screening tickets from the comic book store, where apparently they couldn’t GIVE the damn things away.)
(Though, obviously, they could give them away to ME, but I think I was the only person who took them.)
(Also: hey, how come they haven’t remade Darby O’Gill and the Little People, yet? Leprechauns are the new vampires.)
Yeah, and also: Disney was counting on John Carter to not just be a wash, but to set itself up for sequels and merchandising and et cetera. So, even if JC(M) had just broken exactly even, Disney’s got to make a sequel on credit (maybe meaning that they’re going to end the next fiscal year with no money), and they’ve got to look at their estimated costs over the next two years with a big hole where they used to have “$3.5 million worth of John Carter Brand Martian lunch-pails sold by August 2012″, and they also have to listen to some smarmy executive insisting that they’d be $75 million dollars up right now if they’d just done a remake of Darby O’Gill and the Little People like he told them to, plus staring down the barrel of another $20 million dollars with Darby O’Gill Brand curly-toed shoes that the kids would all be crazy about getting in time for school to start in November.
You know, I would be a lot more sympathetic to Bill Maher’s call for compassion towards Rush Limbaugh if, 1) Rush Limbaugh wasn’t already obscenely wealthy, so who cares if he loses his radio show and his “livelihood”? He’s plenty rich, he’ll still be a bloated hog carcass with a sex palace in the Dominican Republic, whatever. The fat sack of crap isn’t going to starve, or anything (unfortunately).
But also, 2) if this hadn’t come after a BUNCH of conservative pundits said, “How come you liberals give Rush Limbaugh a lot of shit over this, but not Bill Maher when he says horrible misogynist crap?” ANd then there was a bunch of liberals who — demonstrating that “liberal” actually IS a morally superior philosophy to “conservative” — turned to each other and said, “Hey, you know? GOOD POINT.”
“Uh…guys there’s no…no reason to get excited about this…this whole misogyny thing. It’s not, I’m just saying, let’s all just agree that it’s not that big a deal, you know?” — Bill Maher.
Also Top’s Gun, about a man named Top who is always on the bottom, until he snaps and goes on a killing spree.
It’s interesting; I don’t think Zack Snyder is a bad director so much as I think he’s actually just kind of dumb? He’s deifnitely very competent, and often very visually innovative, but he also maybe just actually doesn’t understand what anything is or means or why it’s important.
And the tragedy of Zack Snyder I think is that he really DOES want to make thoughtful, intelligent movies, he really seems like he’s got a genuine interest in understanding the cultural conversation. He just can’t, because he’s maybe kind of a dumb guy.