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 +4Posted on Jul 19th, 2013 | re: Mini Pool Accidents Are The Summer's Trampoline Accidents (18 comments)

Man, Tom Daley really let himself go.

 +3Posted on Mar 11th, 2013 | re: This iCarly Remix Video Makes Me Feel 14,000 Years Old (31 comments)

I hate being appart of this “millennial” kind of generation, when I’m keen to attach myself to brands rather than ideals. Growing up, Hot Topic was it. That was the brand that I felt I most identified with, and it only took until I was older to realize how TERRIFYING that is. Fealty to a retailer, let alone one that doesn’t even make its own clothes, is ridiculous. Selling nostalgia stunts the growth of ideals.

 +15Posted on Mar 11th, 2013 | re: Saturday Night Live: Justin Timberlake Enters The Five-Timers Club (53 comments)

I’m nearly positive Dan Aykroyd would not have agreed to be there if he wasn’t allowed to put his Crystal Skull vodka behind him on the bar.

 +17Posted on Mar 11th, 2013 | re: This iCarly Remix Video Makes Me Feel 14,000 Years Old (31 comments)

MY COMPUTER IS BROKEN! ITS ALL CLICKS AND BEEPS WHEN I PLAY THE VIDEO.

 +5Posted on Jan 21st, 2013 | re: Saturday Night Live: Jennifer Lawrence And The Lumineers (12 comments)

I really enjoyed the radio station sketch. It was dumb funny, but I was tired and it hit just the right notes to have me really laughing.

 +15Posted on Nov 21st, 2012 | re: You Just Have To Deal With This Adorable Baby (13 comments)

“No, bro. Dude, I’m not falling asleep. I’m just… bro. Can you make sure my shoes are off bro?”

 +10Posted on Oct 23rd, 2012 | re: Another Year, Another Halloween Light Show (19 comments)

 +10Posted on Oct 9th, 2012 | re: BABIES TASTING LEMONS, Y'ALL! (13 comments)

I’m sorry (not sorry), but as cute as babies are, dogs eating lemons is so much better. Because while babies’ reactions are cute, scrunched-up “ugh” faces, dogs’ reactions are “WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING IN MY MOUTH BARK BARK KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT.” Which is the appropriate response.

 +8Posted on Oct 8th, 2012 | re: That's Your TV Show: The First Family (9 comments)

Wait, I thought UPN went out of business?

 +8Posted on Oct 8th, 2012 | re: The Powerful Inspiration Of Chet Haze's 8th Grade Yearbook Page (33 comments)

I know, right?! It’s like he heard one of their b-sides first and insisted that was their best song and keeps trying to defend it by bringing up that one line that’s kind of cool.

 +21Posted on Oct 8th, 2012 | re: The Powerful Inspiration Of Chet Haze's 8th Grade Yearbook Page (33 comments)

I do believe Abe FROMAN is the Sausage King of Chicago. Abe Forman sounds like a distant relative of Eric Forman. Speaking of, what’s up with Topher Grace?

“Sorry for Daredevil, too. Will cover everything. – Ben”

 +7Posted on Oct 8th, 2012 | re: Katherine Chloe Cahoon's Music Video Is Here, Perfect (36 comments)

Beat poet stereotypes.

 +10Posted on Oct 8th, 2012 | re: Katherine Chloe Cahoon's Music Video Is Here, Perfect (36 comments)

Based on the amount of time I spent in Manchester (a week), this is pretty indicative of most men there. But, I cannot fault her. He is European. Ish.

 +9Posted on Oct 8th, 2012 | re: Ohio State Marching Band Expose Themselves As NERDS! (16 comments)

There’s no way any of us could see this coming. I mean, marching band members liking nerd culture? Who would have thought?!

And finally, you know you’ve just validated Steve Winwood’s existence by acknowledging that Gummo exists and is a movie, right?

 +6Posted on Oct 3rd, 2012 | re: Moby Dick, Except In Space: The Movie Sounds Great, Actually (30 comments)

Post copy, I mean. I’m just going to keep digging this hole if that’s okay with you guys.

 +2Posted on Oct 3rd, 2012 | re: Moby Dick, Except In Space: The Movie Sounds Great, Actually (30 comments)

Bah. Scroll down, you bastard! Sorry for the pay copy, ashleigh. :-/

 +6Posted on Oct 3rd, 2012 | re: Moby Dick, Except In Space: The Movie Sounds Great, Actually (30 comments)

Or that episode of Futurama. Beware the Bermuda Tetrahedron.

I love Tim Thomas, and I am all for people expressing their opinions in manners they see fit, but the degree to which he voices those opinions is egregiously disproportionate to how much of a shit I give about what he’s saying. Got eat some Chik-fil-A, Tim Thomas, and be a good goalie.

My mother most assuredly would not like Daniel Tosh. “Why does he show such terrible videos?! *gasp* That’s terrible!” she would say.

 +8Posted on Oct 2nd, 2012 | re: Ahh, Be Careful With Your Teeth! (18 comments)

Four out of five dentists can’t sit through this video without screaming in abject terror.

 +13Posted on Sep 17th, 2012 | re: Saturday Night Live: Seth MacFarlane And Frank Ocean (50 comments)

Appropriate, Kelly. Your description of the Wooden Spoons sketch as “perfect” is spot on.

 +36Posted on Sep 17th, 2012 | re: Saturday Night Live: Seth MacFarlane And Frank Ocean (50 comments)

On tape, from my laptop in my bed, it’s Sunday Afternoon!

 +3Posted on Sep 17th, 2012 | re: Krispy Kreme - "Denzel Washington" (22 comments)

Hey, Anne Heche was pretty good in “John Q.”… Where’s her hip hop ode?