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David_notascynical
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 +2Posted on Jul 19th, 2012 | re: Best New Party Game 68: Name Your Vagina After A Movie (233 comments)

Oh, and Glory.

 +37Posted on Jul 19th, 2012 | re: Best New Party Game 68: Name Your Vagina After A Movie (233 comments)

Scent of a woman

 +11Posted on Feb 3rd, 2012 | re: How To Get A Boyfriend In Middle School (43 comments)

HI ROBERT!

The one where Abraham pretends his wife is actually his sister, so she will be raped but he won’t be killed, while they are journeying through an apocryphal wasteland, trying to reach the sea.

 -2Posted on Jul 14th, 2011 | re: Alison Brie And Gillian Jacobs GQ "Lesbian Scene" Open Thread (140 comments)

Sorry, not enough bile today. This gets a pass.

 +4Posted on Jan 31st, 2011 | re: That's Your Boyfriend: Bob Nelson (76 comments)

In fairness to him, he takes everyone of my dollar bills to the strip joint to promote marriage to those poor strippers. We shouldn’t jump to harsh conclusions.

 +10Posted on Dec 1st, 2010 | re: Seven Amazing Quotes From Randy And Evi Quaid (56 comments)

The Quaid’s certainly are taking that spiral and turning it into a modern interpretive dance of success.

 +32Posted on Nov 30th, 2010 | re: Lost: Please Help (85 comments)

That still leaves 10%.

Because all monsters give 110%

 +4Posted on Nov 30th, 2010 | re: The Greatest Fight Of The Whole Century (2000-2012) (66 comments)

If we remember our Charles Williams, doppelgangers are to be avoided/hung up on.

 +10Posted on Nov 1st, 2010 | re: What Was Tina Fey's Halloween Costume? (62 comments)

Clearly she is a TV producer being a celebrity who is playing an animated character from the major motion picture, Megamind. Clearly.

 +2Posted on Sep 23rd, 2010 | re: Sad Keanu Eats A Cupcake (102 comments)

Sad Keanu should take a weekend tour of an ante-bellum plantation on a non-holiday weekend.

 +6Posted on Aug 31st, 2010 | re: Teen Korner: Disney Blam! Ain't Your Daddy's Toonz (85 comments)

You are speaking like Tony Horton.

“We call her Pam-the-blam.” – P90x aficionado

 0Posted on Aug 25th, 2010 | re: Hot Drinks! (42 comments)

Cock it!

 +10Posted on Aug 25th, 2010 | re: Duh Aficionado Magazine: America Does Not Got Talent (72 comments)

VoilĂ ! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate.

Looking at you America, to prove him right.

 +6Posted on Aug 23rd, 2010 | re: Best New Party Game 30: Guy Movies! And Also Girl Movies! (314 comments)

Conception

Guy and girl, right? Or am I way off?

You, sir, are most certainly not the pine-scented air.

 +6Posted on Aug 23rd, 2010 | re: Where Do You SnazzyNap? (91 comments)

To live in perpetual Twilight. Who would want to do that?

 +81Posted on Aug 18th, 2010 | re: Hello, Inmates, Welcome To Your Asylum (488 comments)

But I am just one commenter, how can I make a difference?

 +5Posted on Aug 13th, 2010 | re: Bill O'Reilly Vs. Jennifer Aniston: Lamest Feud Of 2010 (59 comments)

Homelyness? You calling cracker barrel ugly or that it looks like a place of abode?

 +4Posted on Jul 22nd, 2010 | re: Comic-Con Is Humanly Impossible (157 comments)

I “Right-clicked”-> “Open in New Tab” on the “Read More” link so that I would not lose my place in line.

Nerdo!

 +12Posted on Jul 21st, 2010 | re: See You At Comic-Con 2010! (BONUS: BNPG) (1095 comments)

Yeah, whatever you do, don’t try to talk and make sense, and stuff like that.

 +12Posted on Jul 20th, 2010 | re: Lindsay Lohan Goes To Jail OR: Animals Dressed For Work (137 comments)

What ’bout a picture of LINDSAY dressed for work? Is that even possible? What would that even mean?

 +22Posted on Jul 14th, 2010 | re: One Flew Over The Razor Scooter's Nest (83 comments)

If the troubled teenager was played by R-Patz and the hospital patient was played by Spencer Pratt and the love interest was played by Heidi Montag, with a supporting cast of The Blue Collar Comedy Team and Cher, I would not be as interested in watching it.

 +3Posted on Jul 6th, 2010 | re: Double Rainbow All The Way (74 comments)

Apparently BBQ agrees with everyone, cause, kudos to the commentating.

 +7Posted on Jun 30th, 2010 | re: R.I.P. Larry King Live (37 comments)

This guy, maybe? Or has the ink already dried on his contract (not that that stops SOME people).