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covered in bees
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 0Posted on May 3rd, 2010 | re: Best New Party Game: 22: #worstbiopics (291 comments)

Paris Hilton IS Ghengis Khan

Oh thank you, clearly I was drunk when I read that part.

Wasn’t it Orestes that killed Clytamnestra? Just saying….

 +2Posted on Apr 30th, 2010 | re: Well, The Jonah Hex Trailer Is Dumb (88 comments)

“I am pretty sure I am a doppelganger for Alan Alda. I’m a tranny. I’m a man. I’m so painfully insecure. I’m on the verge of vomiting now. I am so horrified that I am here, and embarrassed. I’m scared,”

Actual Megan Fox quote. And when I typed “Megan Fox d” into google, “umb quotes” immediately popped up.

 +15Posted on Apr 29th, 2010 | re: Well, The Jonah Hex Trailer Is Dumb (88 comments)

The only thing more disappointing than her acting is her attempt at an accent. Or maybe that is part of her acting? What I’m trying to say is that Megan Fox is a simpleton.

 +7Posted on Apr 29th, 2010 | re: Well, The Jonah Hex Trailer Is Dumb (88 comments)

Who in the hell put this cast together? Josh Brolin, John Malkovich, Megan Fox and Johnny Basil from OZ? It’s as if someone blindly jabbed a finger at a list of names to pick these actors.

 +9Posted on Apr 29th, 2010 | re: Chelsea Handler Sex Tape Thread Or Animals Eating Birthday Cake Thread (152 comments)

It appears to be an orangutan.

 +4Posted on Apr 29th, 2010 | re: This Is Your Parking Job (37 comments)

My office was closed for three days last year because someone drove a car out of the adjacent parking garage and through the wall on the second floor of my building.

 +44Posted on Apr 29th, 2010 | re: That's Your Bank: Face Bank (38 comments)

My roommate has one. It’s green and between the color and the strange vomit-like noises, it’s like living with a tiny seasick man.

I used to live around the corner from the Grey’s Papaya they filmed a scene in from of. I was so relieved when I moved, every time I saw that Grey’s Papaya I got Vietnam-style flashbacks of this awful, awful movie.

There had better be poison in this Twilight ring.

Oh MAN. Is it bad that I can’t wait until I can play the Wicked Summer drinking game. For surely there will be a Wicked Summer drinking game.

 +7Posted on Apr 14th, 2010 | re: Check Out Charlie Sheen, Or As I Like To Call Him, Mr. Cool Disguise (51 comments)

That mustache is more realistic than most of the plots of Two and a Half Men. And more enjoyable.

 +17Posted on Apr 13th, 2010 | re: Steven Seagal Should Rest His Sex Case! (87 comments)

Did anyone really think that people were giving it away for free to Steven Seagal?

 +1Posted on Apr 13th, 2010 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Chasing Amy (294 comments)

AHHHH!!!!! NICK AND NORAH!!! This is the day I have been waiting for. I hate Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist more than any other movie on earth. It is King Worst of Worstopia. It automatically wins as worst movie of all time. I’ll be sad to say goodbye to The Hunt, but there cannot possibly be another movie worse than Nick and Norah, and so I can only conclude that The Hunt must end. Goodbye Hunt! Burn in Hell Nick and Norah!

 0Posted on Apr 9th, 2010 | re: Hugh Jackman Is Going To Have To Start Wearing Pants On His Face (57 comments)

That’s going straight into the LOLk. I’m looking at a really solid LOL investment portfolio now, thanks to this.

Is that what she was doing? Was that why her pants were missing?

 +4Posted on Apr 9th, 2010 | re: Happy 2nd Birthday, Videogum (177 comments)

I’d say the prices are comparable.

 +14Posted on Apr 9th, 2010 | re: Happy 2nd Birthday, Videogum (177 comments)

Us baby monsters just sat at home. Alone. Thinking about the fun we could be having if we were months older…. Or rich enough for fake IDs.

 0Posted on Apr 8th, 2010 | re: SPOILER ALERT: TV Will Continue To Often Be Terrible (89 comments)

So is John Gosslin going to watch the kids? Will he get Christian Audigier to help him like they’re in some twisted white trash version of the Sound of Music?

 +2Posted on Apr 7th, 2010 | re: Best New Party Game: 20: Freddie Prinze Jr. Hackey Sack Movie Plots (147 comments)

I’ve seen it too. Multiple times. Sad. Can I just point out how appropriate the Bjork ad right next to the video is? I think maybe Zach actually stole his hackey sack performance art from Bjork.

 +13Posted on Apr 6th, 2010 | re: Gossip Girl S03E17: I Would Like To Play Assassin With This Show (25 comments)

What?

 +20Posted on Apr 6th, 2010 | re: Robot Sidekick Final Tally:
Craig Ferguson: 1
Gabe: 0
(29 comments)

That is a more lifelike facial expression than I have ever seen her make. I also like how she’s wearing shoes even with the nudity.

 +9Posted on Apr 6th, 2010 | re: Robot Sidekick Final Tally:
Craig Ferguson: 1
Gabe: 0
(29 comments)

Maybe that Mythbusters guy can build you a robot Gwyneth Paltrow sidekick.