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 +2Posted on Jun 13th, 2011 | re: The 2011 Tony Awards (25 comments)

I watched the shit out of the Tonys, and I have a question for anyone else who did: (1) Is Frances McDormand OK? She seemed… otherwise.

 +8Posted on Sep 13th, 2010 | re: The Unfortunate Return Of The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time (940 comments)

I nominate 28 Days with Sandra Bullock.

 +25Posted on Aug 13th, 2010 | re: Well, Ladies? Paul Rudd Or Owen Wilson? FUCKING CHOOSE! (76 comments)

I hope she ends up with Jack Nicholson.

 +14Posted on Jun 16th, 2010 | re: Hey, What's Up With Topher Grace? (79 comments)

Gabe and Max are coming to San Diego?! YESSSSS. That is the coolest thing to happen to San Diego since Comic-Con. Seriously, though, West Coast pizza party? FOR ONCE?

 +8Posted on Feb 15th, 2010 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Armageddon (115 comments)

Again, I humbly nominate 28 Days — the Sandra Bullock in hyper-rehab one, not the monster one with the similar name. It is just really bad.

 +9Posted on Jan 21st, 2010 | re: When You Wrestle With The Ginger, You're Gonna Get Wet With Lawyers (78 comments)

Yeah, his unblinking face freaks me out, and it makes him look so much more like a little ginger potato. He is the ultimate self-potato.

 +8Posted on Jan 20th, 2010 | re: 100 Cheesiest Movie Quotes (32 comments)

Also in reply to it’sahotdog: I feel a Best New Party Game coming on! Mixing & matching the best worst movie quotes. Nobody puts baby in a box of chocolates. Put the bunny back in the corner.

 +5Posted on Jan 18th, 2010 | re: Ugh Aficionado Magazine (19 comments)

After booting Jeff Dunham from the lineup, Fox was probably worried about losing traction with the coveted 18-worst demographic.

 +9Posted on Jan 11th, 2010 | re: The NFL's Ladainian Tomlinson Must Be Very Rich! (33 comments)

I can’t tell if this is a step up from his Easy Turf commercials or just a side step, side step, side step.

 +2Posted on Dec 25th, 2009 | re: Happy Holidays, You Guys (56 comments)

I love you all, Monsters! Have a great day and end of 2010.
(Except you, Morales1986 — you can go die.)

 +7Posted on Dec 14th, 2009 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Blindness (85 comments)

Seconded! 28 Days was terrible-terrible. Sandra Bullock is becoming the Robin Williams of actresses.

 +7Posted on Dec 4th, 2009 | re: Brooklyn We Go Hard: The Movie (36 comments)

Confessing Ethan Hawke looks a LOT like Gollum. ” I don’t WANT his forgiveness; I WANT MY PRECIOUS!!!”

 +5Posted on Dec 4th, 2009 | re: We Are All Jersey Shore (71 comments)

Right? And that shit will be definite rape-rape. I feel like eating ham. Ham.

 +13Posted on Dec 3rd, 2009 | re: Glee S01E11-12: Phew! Everything That Glees Is Not Suck! (42 comments)

I think I would have enjoyed the tummy reveal if Schue hadn’t kept telling Terri to “pick up her shirt.” Eh? Off the floor? Here in the world we live in, we say “LIFT up your shirt.” I oblige that request at least 45 times a day, so I know.

 +16Posted on Dec 1st, 2009 | re: You Guys, Let's Have A Videogum Video Pizza Party For Real! (349 comments)

I would also be the only member. We should do it.

It’s Tuesday in Southern California and it’s sunny in December but it doesn’t matter because I’m actually really upset that I won’t be able to go to the New York pizza party with my monster friends who I only know via the Internet. (MLIT.)

Right, there it is. Good morning, I’m a jackass.

Question, and sorry if it’s been brought up – wasn’t there a Direct TV ad with the little girl from Poltergeist? The “They’re hee-eeer” girl? Isn’t she dead too?

Postrapeously! HA!
By “Rob Marshall,” I think you mean “Tamra Davis,” who directed a little movie called “Crossroads.” I love rock ‘n’ roll.

I think it’s probably one-sided because a lot of people feel that what he did was not just “terrible and wrong,” but deserving of punishment like any other man who anally rapes — sorry, has unlawful anal sex with — a kid. Shady dealings between the judge and the prosecutor — well, there’s always the appeals process, right?

I think the best reply to “the victim has filed to have the case dismissed” came from the Salon article referenced earlier: “For good or ill, the justice system doesn’t work on behalf of victims; it works on behalf of justice.”

 0Posted on Sep 18th, 2009 | re: That's Your Music Video: Tom OC (69 comments)

Kieran Culkin is not looking so good.

 +8Posted on Aug 13th, 2009 | re: Best New Party Game 6 (411 comments)

PG-Rated Even for the Swinging ’60s “Dancing”

 +25Posted on Jul 30th, 2009 | re: You Can Make It Up: Jon Gosselin Hangs Out With His Friends (44 comments)

PC showed up and he saw Esther and he was like, “See? A bunch of children. Can we have the virgin conversation, ’cause I bet Jigsaw is a yes.”

Age 7, huh? Huh. There’s something wrong with Esther.

 +25Posted on Jul 24th, 2009 | re: We Are All Aging Anakin Skywalkers (27 comments)

I love the air quotes around “friend’s house,” as if it’d be so uncool to say “Neverland Ranch’s Naboo-themed movie screening carousel.”

 +36Posted on Jul 23rd, 2009 | re: That's Your Girlfriend: Katherine Heigl (42 comments)

You guys never understood or appreciated the careful thought I put into the balloon color scheme. That was 525,600 minutes of PLANNING THE BEST NIGHT OF OUR LIVES. I’ll see you at the reunion.