Captain Boring of the S.S. Shut Up
Website: -

Latest Comments


 +9Posted on Feb 8th, 2014 | re: Heaven Just Got A Little More Videogum (279 comments)

Thanks, Videogum. It’s been a lot of fun.

 +20Posted on Feb 3rd, 2014 | re: Hey Guys, We Have To Talk To You About Something (353 comments)

Well this is the worst.

 +5Posted on Mar 18th, 2013 | re: Girls Season 2 Finale Open Thread (48 comments)

I was definitely a little confused as to why there was not one, but two scenes of emotional reunions with old flames. They were well done, but also not all that true to the way the show has ever gone. Then I found out Judd Apatow co-wrote the episode and it made a bit more sense. I’m not going to pretend the scene with Adam wasn’t well done, or even exciting to watch, but it just didn’t make all that much sense.

I also think in general, the show just tries to pack to much into each episode, so that when the season ends, so many story arcs feel unresolved, or resolved in a very unsatisfying way.

But it was still enjoyable enough this season. Hopefully with 12 episodes and the advantage of hindsight, next season will be a little tighter.

 +8Posted on Feb 1st, 2013 | re: Katie Couric Went On A Date With Larry King (19 comments)

I haven’t read the article yet, but is this public handjob from the date or another time? Either way, my weekend is now ruined.

 +6Posted on Nov 15th, 2012 | re: Gwyneth Paltrow On "Being A Writer" (36 comments)

To be fair, she did pen one of the enduring lines of our generation, as seen in the photo above. Those activities she described are what a writer does with all of their royalty money. Also, in this scenario, Gwyneth Paltrow thinks they are only called “royalties” for her because she’s special and lives in a castle (AKA lorry), probably.

 +8Posted on Nov 8th, 2012 | re: Looking Good, David Arquette! (18 comments)

David Arquette: Everything but the Cox.

 +46Posted on Nov 7th, 2012 | re: Barack Obama Re-Elected President Of The United States (83 comments)

By far my favorite tweets of last night were from Victoria Jackson:

9:02: “I can’t stop crying.”

9:02: “America died”

9:07: “I can’t stop crying. America died.”

Haha what is the last tweet about?? I’d like to imagine that at 9:06, she was like, I don’t get it, why didn’t those tweets make me feel any better?? Maybe this will help…

 +1Posted on Oct 12th, 2012 | re: This Week In Movie Trailers, You Guys (8 comments)

Tarzan 3D looks like if Jurassic Park 3 happened on Pandora, if that makes sense.

 +13Posted on Oct 11th, 2012 | re: Duh Aficionado Magazine: Mitt Romney Isn't Coach Taylor (48 comments)

Yes! I was just writing the same thing! I haven’t commented in ages, and I had to sign in and comment just because this is so incredible. Wow, Gabe. Kahdooz!

 +2Posted on Aug 7th, 2012 | re: Ragu: For When Your Parents Are Getting It Wet (39 comments)

That kids parents when they woke up that morning: “Theme of the day: Saucy!!”

 +4Posted on Jul 27th, 2012 | re: This Week In Movie Trailers, You Guys (45 comments)

Yes!! Read everything by David Mitchell, but Black Swan Green first!

 +4Posted on Jul 23rd, 2012 | re: Uh-Oh, Is Tom Cruise Trying To Scientology Recruit Russell Brand?! (22 comments)

Oh no! Not Russell Brand! Take my eyes, but not Russell Brand!

 +11Posted on Jul 19th, 2012 | re: The 2012 Emmy Nominations (85 comments)

As long as Sherlock or Luther wins Outstanding Miniseries, we all win!

 +4Posted on Jul 11th, 2012 | re: "Daniel Tosh Encourages Audience Member Gang Rape" Follow-Up (150 comments)

I was going to post about the notion of “If you don’t want to get insulted don’t go to comedy clubs.” in Gabe’s post called “Nobody Likes Comedy”. I think that’s the main reason that comedians don’t consistently sell out venues even though it’s probably one of the best ways to spend money if you are looking for a fun night out. I hate that that is considered a given even though 99% of the amazing comedians I’ve been lucky enough to see never insult anyone in the crowd. They are funny enough to come up with their own material for laughs. It’s so stupid that people should be scared to be insulted at a comedy show, and I hate when people continue to claim that’s a thing.

 +1Posted on Jun 29th, 2012 | re: An Interview With Mark And Jay Duplass (16 comments)

You know this was Kelly because if Gabe did the interview, the first and only question would have been: “Where do you get your ideas”?

 +7Posted on Jun 26th, 2012 | re: The Jew-Hating Elmo Of Central Park (42 comments)

I’m assuming they are to bait you into getting him to start ranting about the knee-gro’s…

 +35Posted on Jun 8th, 2012 | re: The New Hit Single From Max Harris, "High" (23 comments)

 +2Posted on Jun 8th, 2012 | re: The New Hit Single From Max Harris, "High" (23 comments)

Are we sure this isn’t a young Max Silvestri using a stage name?



 +4Posted on Mar 15th, 2012 | re: Lady Gillian Anderson: What Could Have Been (23 comments)

Wait…Hold on. The name of the show isn’t DowntoWn Abbey??? My head just exploded. Also, it’s a good thing I haven’t been calling it that for months…

 +4Posted on Oct 11th, 2011 | re: New Chet Haze Music Video, Son! #GETCHAZED (38 comments)

Yikes, clearly the acting gene didn’t get passed on to little Chester.At least he’s a good sing…Er, at least his dad is rich enough to pay for his music videos.

 +17Posted on Oct 4th, 2011 | re: Breaking News: Maurice Sendak Does Not Like Gwyneth Paltrow! (14 comments)

I’d absolutely watch a show with him and Anthony Bourdain just reading a list of things they hate.

 +16Posted on Oct 4th, 2011 | re: Will You Guys Please Stop Raping Johnny Depp? (33 comments)

Holy shit! A necrophiliac! I better hide these ashes!

 +7Posted on Sep 16th, 2011 | re: This Week In Movie Trailers, You Guys (39 comments)

I saw an advanced screening of We Bought a Zoo, and if you sit through the credits, there is a bonus scene that sets up the sequel:

 +1Posted on Sep 16th, 2011 | re: This Week In Movie Trailers, You Guys (39 comments)

Also, “step improvement” is cool NYC office lingo, if you didn’t get that.