“I spent a shit ton of my teenage years asking for forgiveness over those goddamned thoughts; nearly cut my arm off cause they WERE THAT INTENSE OF SEXUAL FANTASIES.”

Ha ha. Asking for forgiveness from who? And clearly you and Kirstie have quite a history together… so, sorry to be a dick. But LET’S TRY TO GET A HANDLE ON figuring out when to use CAPS LOCK.

Now when you say you’re a “huge” Kirstie Alley fan, do you mean you are also a little on the chunky side? Or that you really admire and appreciate her work as an actress/fat person?

Maybe they mean powerful as in the child army she has been putting together for a while now. Lara Croft raiding a womb near you.

American Patriot? More like American Hate-riot. If you don’t love Kirstie Alley, you don’t love America. Communist.