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Ugh. Jay Reatard dies yesterday at 29 and this douchenozzle’s evil, evil heart is still beating. The world ain’t right.
This was broadcast on the Onion News Network, right?
Really, they seriously couldn’t find better pictures of that kid? No glamor shots? No pre-school photographs, or happy shots of him smiling on Mommy’s lap, full of promise, with his entire life ahead of him? Those pics make him look like he’s already been beaten and worn down by life’s inevitable disappointments, like the rest of us. STAY GOLD, PONYBOY!
If you think this is bad, you should hear the anti-AIDS anthem done to the tune of “New York, New York”.
Stop spreadin’ the AIDS…
Jesus, did you see the size of those presents? There must be enough frankincense in there to kill a horse.
I was going to remark in wonder that Usher is still alive, until I learnt that not only is he still alive, but he released an album in 2008! Who knew? I did not know. Regardless, this does not change the fact that Usher has just been upstaged by a goat. That goat does have a certain poise, natural charisma and uncanny stage presence about him, but still.
Nah, I think He puts so much energy into loving himself that he wouldn’t have any leftover for committing murder. I think he’s going to concentrate all that narcissistic energy into having his own “The Situation” workout video/program. Only 3 easy payments of $9.95, and one easy, nonrefundable payment of Your Soul.
I think “tshirtsore” is an amazing and hilarious typo and I hope it never changes. Maybe that’s why the cast members have to spend so much time with their shirts off, because of their various “t shirt sores”. Ewww.
This is one of those rare instances where the cover is so much better than the original.
“The Japanese poet Basho once said, ‘Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise. Seek what they sought.’ P.S., I’m going to eat your children.”
That’s all he can muster with Christopher Lloyd bent over in front of him? Talk about wasted opportunities.
Wow, he’s using a loop pedal. That’s some Andrew Bird shit right there. Andrew CHICKEN, to be precise! I said that because a chicken is a type of bird and this guy is wearing a chicken suit.
Also, anything involving the melodica is automatically awesome.
Thanks for that, I’m sure II’ll be seeing this screenshot in my nightmares.
If my boyfriend forced me to warm egg nog I’d tell him to suck it.
I think it’s clever that he spelled his name “R-U-F-F”, when of course we know the correct way to spell it is “R-O-U-G-H”. It’s an interesting play on the rules of pronunciation.
It makes me sad to think that after he made it rain he probably had to pick all that money up off the floor and put it back into his bank account.
Not sure why “The Situation” settled on that particular sobriquet to describe him and his rock-hard abdominals. I know he explained it by saying something like “you see how ripped up I am and you just know it’s a situation”, but illuminating as that was I remain unconvinced. Why not just go with “Mikey Abs” or “Mikey Ripped Abs” or “Mikey Six-Pack” or “Mikey Rambo (pretty much)”? I suppose since “situation” is clearly his favorite word, and since it seems to be one of the only polysyllabic words he has mastered, he decided to associate it with his most prized feature. Nevermind, I just answered my own question.
Don’t let anybody tell you you’re not hump-able,
because you’re bump-able
well I hope this doesn’t make you feel uncomfortable.
Whatever. There’s not much you can say about a guy that sounds like Satan, pretty much, with his voice sped up.