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Alpacapone
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I’m going to pluck you ’til you love me, f*ggot!

 -4Posted on Jan 26th, 2010 | re: Best New Party Game 15 (319 comments)

- To Infiniti and beyond!
- There is no spoon…ful of Jell-O Pudding
- Luke, I am not your father’s Volvo
- Don’t fuck with the babysitter, without Durex

 0Posted on Jan 26th, 2010 | re: Best New Party Game 15 (319 comments)

“My mother thanks you. My father thanks you. My sister thanks you. And I thank you, VALTREX?.”

 +6Posted on Jan 26th, 2010 | re: Best New Party Game 15 (319 comments)

Dammit – an obvious repeat, I’ll show myself the door.

 -1Posted on Jan 26th, 2010 | re: Best New Party Game 15 (319 comments)

You had me at Hello Kitty?

 +61Posted on Jan 26th, 2010 | re: Best New Party Game 15 (319 comments)

If you Build-a-BearĀ® they will come.

 +2Posted on Jan 11th, 2010 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: The Notebook (127 comments)

He doesn’t die in the (first) book. I can imagine an amazing pitch meeting for the first draft of the script in which the only note was, “needs more DEATH.” Because death is a happy ending in Jesustown or something. God I hate this movie.

 +2Posted on Oct 28th, 2009 | re: Best New Party Game 10.5 (86 comments)

“…and to think I wouldn’t have had the gumption to start my own business had it not been for Mein Kampf and the John Galt speech from Atlas Shrugged.”

 +15Posted on Oct 28th, 2009 | re: Best New Party Game 10.5 (86 comments)

“…you could say my real passion is tailoring, but I really excel in getting girls to help me move furniture into my windowless van.”

 +27Posted on Oct 19th, 2009 | re: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Honey (154 comments)

It’s not a horrible movie because it captures the semi-literate, doe-eyed backup dancer in all of us. All the backup dancers in the audience loved it. The writer did a great job of portraying the existential angst of backup dancing, how we are not bound by the sexy floor taps in our hands, but by the sexy floor taps in our hearts. Also, Ghostface Killah is the Arcade Fire of juvenille detention centers.