Find Me On:
“I don’t have your money. It’s in Tom’s startup… and Fred’s startup.”
all that power has gone to his ass, which was only able to sate itself by swallowing his head
paying $100k to hang out with guy fieri for the day is like not having your cake and then diarrheaing it too
He Hate Me
so, american horror story:
i just don’t know how these girls are going to get any of their important studies done when we’ve already got zombie boyfriend, unholy baby, immortal racist, swamp witch, and voodoo versus magic story lines on our plate. why even call it a school? why not a do-whatever-you-want-all-day-no-supervision-house? because that’s CLEARLY what it is
this season is already too far off the rails! and some of the best parts of season 2 + witches + new orleans left me with such high hopes. at least it’s pretty?
(p.s. we can talk about this show here because it’s basically a comedy, right? whatever kelly you don’t make the rules you’re not the boss of me)
i have to say, this movie appealed to me a little bit. like, if this selection of trailers was a sample platter from which i was to pick a movie to watch immediately, i would definitely give Zero Charisma a considering nod (but i’d ultimately pick Nebraska, no duh).
and the scene that sold me rings true because of my (few) personal Dungeons and Dragons experiences — basically the moment when the outsider reacts to a game scenario as a normal human being would.
okay, so, i have a group of friends, one of which i was living with at the time, who play DND regularly. because i am SOME type of nerd, and generally curious, it was basically foregone that i would join them for a “campaign”. i couldn’t be bothered to learn most of the rules, but otherwise dove right in (and plus, they were totally cool with me playing while drinking. i recommend it!).
but here’s the thing — the way i wanted to approach the world was fundamentally different from the way they all did. in any given scenario, i, as my character, would react as a REAL PERSON would. the rest of the group (“party”), however, would willingly slip into any sort of fantasy trope that appeared. there’s a camp of gnolls on our path ahead? why don’t we just detour around? NOPE, GOTTA SLAUGHTER ‘EM ALL. there are rumours of a rogue peddling a “magic stone” around town? he’s probably a con-man, fuck it. NOPE, WE GOTTA GO INVESTIGATE AND BUY THAT THING.
and really, that’s all fine. different people want to play in different ways. i was never told that i was “playing wrong”, but it was clear our styles weren’t jiving. (ps. we’re still all friends, i just haven’t played DND since)
so Kelly, like, if you want, we could go see it. oh no, don’t worry, we can definitely poke holes in the problematic cliches and the constant pandering, too. and anyway, you owe me for This Is Us.
twist ending: WHO UPLOADED THE VIDEO??!
starring fred durst as jean valjean
i’d like to nominate a cronut in Stiller-face
“i’m mister batman!”
“…we would just say “batman”"
Seal or No Seal
John Legends of the Hidden Temple
that font makes it look more like The Prince is Right
having seen Scarface for the first time only recently, it’s kind of a bad movie, right? or like, at the very best, an extremely problematic movie whose best quality is its legacy and movies/music it inspired (<3 you coke rap <3 is forever fan).
ahhh Dexter spoilers!
…he was made of cake the whole time!!
frankly, Minecraft, i don’t give a damn
i think it’s comforting to know that asking your parents for money plays out the same in other cultures, too
gentlemen, start your enginezzzZZZZZzz
and now i have to recommend Grim Fandango to anyone who hasn’t played it. play it!
i would in no way object if the symphony of science videos received mass airplay. but i guess TECHNICALLY those are definitely not memes (unless you count the video remix of speech as a whole a meme, which, probably), just music videos with relatively high youtube views
dipset harlem shake at your wake
it’s so strange how baby monkeys look and act like adorable little meth-heads, or maybe the other way around (but then, not adorable)
that dunking dog is like “hey guys, check it out- i uploaded a video showing how i taught my human to pang his paws together and make a dumb noise every time i put this ball through a hoop!”
oh, oh! a tale of two sisters is also similar and also excellent.