A friend of mine watched part of this week’s nominee with me, Armageddon, and almost immediately burst into tears. And it was not the dramatic final scene in which Bruce Willis tells Liv Tyler that he loves her and that she should take care of Ben Affleck, which is stupid and hilarious but also emotionally manipulative and a reasonable thing to make someone cry if they are open to the possibility. It was the scene in which Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck and the dude from The Green Mile are first going into space. And then this friend told me a story about how they were on the elliptical trainer at the gym one day and they happened upon Armageddon on the gym TV and they began crying at the gym, on the elliptical trainer! What?! What I’m saying is that I have first hand experience with the ways that movies can have very different effects on people. And while I do not share any of my friend’s borderline-comical emotional reactions to what is ultimately an entirely cliched and ridiculous action movie, it is true that Armageddon is just that: an entirely cliched and ridiculous action movie. Far from the Worst Movie of All Time.

But still very silly (and VERY long). Shall we just talk about that?

So, Armageddon is about how an asteroid the size of Texas is going to hit the Earth, because before 9/11 that is the kind of thing that made us scared. Now, of course, it is much more likely that the Earth will end long before the almost statistically impossible chance of a massive asteroid colliding with the ocean when someone detonates a 12 Monkeys Dirty Bomb full of Joker-gas in Manhattan or whatever. But back then it was like: the only thing that could ruin us now is space. So some meteors start falling and it is total Space-11! YIKES:

So, Billy Bob Thornton is, like, the Boss of NASA or whatever (LOL), and he is like “we have got to fuck up this asteroid,” and some guy is like “we’ll just nuke it,” and Billy Bob Thornton is like “we can’t nuke it because of some made up reason,” and so they decide that the only way to destroy the asteroid and save the Earth is to talk to Bruce Willis, the Best Oil Driller in the World. Oh boy, here we go. Meanwhile, out on the oil rig, Bruce Willis is hitting golf balls at a Greenpeace boat because he is a MAN. Fuck you, Greenpeace! It’s hilarious and stupid how you work to make the world a better place based on deeply held personal beliefs when you should be shooting at Ben Affleck with a shotgun because he is fucking your daughter, Liv Tyler. The army is like “Mr. Bruce Willis, please come with us, asteroid time,” and Bruce Willis is like, “Ben Affleck is fired.” And I don’t even know what the big deal is anyway, because if we learned anything from Deep Impact (we didn’t learn anything from Deep Impact) it’s that when the asteroid hits Earth you just need to run up a tall hill.

So, NASA is going to send a team of astronauts into space to land on the asteroid (sure) and drill a hole in it (yes) and fill the hole with a nuclear device (absolutely). But Bruce Willis is like “you guys are so stupid, the only way to do this is to send me into space.” OH, HOLD ON, WHAT? Nevermind, because it gets so much better a few seconds later when Bruce Willis is like “and I want to take my own team with me.” Take your own team with you? Into space? To land on an asteroid? And drill a hole in the asteroid and put a nuclear bomb in that hole? Better bring Daniel Farraday with you. You don’t want things to get ridiculous.

“When is the asteroid, Bruce Willis is my constant, etcetera etcetera.”

So, Bruce Willis hires all his pals, and surprise: they are so wacky and out of control! Oh, and he hires Ben Affleck, even though he just fired Ben Affleck? Also, Ben Affleck already has his own oil company but it has been literally 24 hours since he was working for Bruce Willis? How did he get an oil company so fast? These are the types of questions we might have time to wonder if that asteroid wasn’t coming straight for us! Of course, it’s hard to imagine a group this ragtag going into space, but they are the only chance we have. Most astronauts train for years to go into space, but these oilmen will only have 12 days. Insert 45 minute training sequence. Now they are ready to go into space! First stop is the international space station where there is a kooky Russian cosmonaut who has space cabin fever and then there is another 45 minute sequence involving fuel lines and space fires and oh no Ben Affleck almost dies but then he doesn’t die at all phew but then a few minutes later he almost dies again but he still doesn’t die. But some people die. Because his ship (one of two!) gets hit by a meteor and crashes on the asteroid. (You know how things in space are always crashing.)

So, blah blah blah this movie is interminable, but so it is hard to drill an asteroid it turns out, and NASA is about to detonate the bomb themselves, but then Bruce Willis gives one of the most powerful speeches of all time:

Acting! I love how this movie pretends like we all have so much respect for oil drilling and have always been in awe of the whole process. “I would never have thought that an oil driller could drill an 800 foot hole in an asteroid, but I would like to believe that that is possible, and Bruce Willis’s idealized oil man character allows me that dream.” Anyway, some more people die, and then Ben Affleck shows up and there is some cheering, and they keep drilling but then there is a space storm (technical term) and the nuclear bomb is damaged and can only be detonated by hand, so they send Juliet into the hole, and fade to white. Just kidding. But so, they draw lots and Ben Affleck draws the short lot, and he is like, well. But then Bruce Willis pulls his oxygen tube while they are out in space? Careful Bruce Willis! I don’t trust that you understand how space suits work well enough to pull a stunt like that! But so now Bruce Willis is going to detonate the bomb. He tells Ben Affleck that he always thought of him as a son, which is weird, because he has been an absolute total asshole to Ben Affleck the whole time. “I hate you, son.” And everyone takes off in their spaceship (although not before another five minutes where maybe the spaceship doesn’t work? One more nail-biter-but-not-really for the road!) They get home and everyone says that Bruce Willis is the bravest man they have ever known and they don’t say a single word about the other dozen of people who died on the mission because they were not brave enough. Then Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler get married. Congrats, you two! You are going to love Jerry Seinfeld’s new show, The Marriage Ref!

And the coolest part is that it all happens in real time!

Look, whatever. Armageddon is a Michael Bay movie. Would you tell the sun to stop making terrible movies? Would you ask the rain not to be so so bad at making movies? He’s just very bad at his job, and until Hollywood realizes that it has the right and the duty to fire him, there’s no use in complaining about it. But there are some things that are worth pointing out. For one thing, is this a movie or a Coke commercial? (“Is there even a difference these days?” — AdBusters’ tombstone.) He kept cutting to these sweeping montages of “America” and the rest of the world, hearing the news and the whole thing was like one giant barf fest of boring stock footage:

This guy loved it:

Whatever, it’s just boring is all. And patently stupid. Much like Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler’s relationship. Speaking of which, I get how Bruce Willis was so upset about them dating because he didn’t want his daughter marrying a roughneck because she was better than that. But then what is up with them having a BMW?

Very roughneck! Very America!

The best part of the movie was Owen Wilson’s small role, which I had completely forgotten about! Pre-suicide-attempt Owen Wilson was the best! Always so funny and such a delight no matter how deep the garbage hole he found himself in. Now he’s just a weird husk of his former self, broken and scared like the rest of us. Oh well.

If anything, I wish we could go back to that blessed time when the things that scared us were asteroids and volcano eruptions. Now it’s all Total Apocalypse and Zombie Bioterrorism and even though those movies are just as cliche-filled and computer-generated, I find them legitimately terrifying and believable. We live in a world of chaos and potential annihilation. And if it does happen, it will be even worse than a thousand Michael Bay movies. But it will probably be much quicker.

Next week: Wild Hogs. As always, please leave your suggestions in the comments or in an email. And if you haven’t done so already, please consult the Official Rules.

Comments (115)
  1. Dear Videogum Staff: I once again nominate the 2009 film Amelia, the biopic about aviatrix Amelia Earhart starring Hilary Swank and Richard Gere, for The Worst Movie of All Time. This is a truly awful film.

    The following gif serves sadly well as a metaphor for my viewing experience of this film. Imagine if you will that I am this child:

    What did I come to the theater expecting? I expected entertainment. I expected good acting and a sensible, not too distracting story line. I expected to be moved by the noble and heroic life of Amelia Earhart, a woman who broke down barriers for women and changed the perception of what it meant to be feminine.

    Instead, I was rudely surprised. ?Pranked,? if you will, like this child, who had a rotten, thoughtless person place a mechanical jumping bird on his plate. He was delighted, as you can clearly see from his face, by the bird. HE WAS INNOCENT. All he wanted was the simple pleasures of a toy bird. But he was cruelly tricked and hurt. Likewise, I was cruelly tricked and hurt by this film?s awfulness. This, my friends, was a terrible, hurtful film, a painful surprise, a breach of trust.

    I shall be here next week and every week with a similar message till this film?s inclusion is secure. Good day and thank you for your time.

  2. I nominate The Chumscrubber! Please do it! It’s the worst!

  3. And don’t forget that Aerosmith song. That really didn’t help matters.

    • Oh man, that song – to this day, I have to change the station when it comes on. Also any Aerosmith video with Liv Tyler in it creeps me out.

  4. I still say Running with Scissors. But also, if we’re getting in the realm of emotional manipulation, do Marley and Me. I constantly hear about how sad that movie is from very dumb people. Lastly, Gabe should finish the awful movies based off terrible Nicholas Sparks tradition and do Nights in Rodanthe.

  5. Okay, now seeing Daniel Faraday appear in this review…I’m pretty sure that he is my constant.

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    WOOOO.

  6. Did I get here in time? Because “The Shape of Things,” you guys. “The Shape of Things.”

  7. I nominate Dragonfly starring Kevin Costner.

  8. Elitist Cinephile WTF of the Day: Armageddon, along with Mr. Bay’s previous masterpiece, The Rock had Criterion Collection releases.

  9. Mission to Mars. Cheadle and Sinese…acting!

    • WMOAT’s first-ever double feature is warranted! Mission to Mars and Red Planet — both about crappy, trouble-prone Mars missions, somehow both from the year 2000. Please, Gabe, please!

  10. woozefa  |   Posted on Feb 15th, 2010 +11

    hey guys! my girlfriend broke up with me and broke my heart and soul and life, and i wanted to take a bunch of pills or shoot myself or asphyxiate in the garage but my jeep doesn’t have a tope. and then i thought of ya’ll! what’d i miss?

  11. I am nominating The Squid and the Whale. Unwatchable. Try it.

    • Was this already done and I forgot and was also too lazy to check? If so, “My bad”. Otherwise, it is just as deserving as Armageddon.

    • i didn’t like it either… though it did have Figure 8 by Blossom Dearie (a song I loved when it was rocking the Schoolhouse)…so that almost made it worth watching?
       
      The Best part was when they finally showed the squid and the whale and I was like “FINALLY!” and all the haters were like “Shut your effin mouth!” and I was like “Reset!”

    • Did your parents get divorced when you were a kid? That movie is much better if they did. So what I’m saying is that if you ever get a time machine, after you KILL MUSSOLINI, you should break up the marriage of your own parents so you can better enjoy a minor indie film. And by “enjoy” I mean “feel like you’re re-living your parents’ divorce.”

      • Interesting comment. I was so-so about this movie when I saw it, but will freely admit to crying while watching most any dead dad movie (Big Fish, FREQUENCY, etc.) because my dad died when I was a kid. So now I feel like I understand the passion people have for The Squid and the Whale a little more.

        There are several dead dad movies that could be in contention for TWMOAT. Jack Frost being the first that comes to mind!

    • woozefa  |   Posted on Feb 16th, 2010 +5

      funny, just watched this again today and loved it. it’s well written, well acted, well directed. made me cry.

      • I’ll agree that it’s all of those things but I found all of the characters so grating I had to shut it off. But, never been through a divorce so obviously my lens for these sorts of things is not in focus.

  12. don’t forget the version of that Aeromith song that featured snippets of Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler in the “animal crackers in underwear scene.” that really didn’t help.

  13. Failure to Launch… Matthew McConaughey + Sarah Jessica Parker + secret jerk Zooey Deschanel + animal humor = worst movie contender.

  14. Gabe, Michael Bay is not very bad at his job. He is actually very good at it. He is hired to make action crap movies that exploit the viewers emotions and senses. His job is to suck money out of the public through the medium of film. I don’t how I feel about this even being nominated. It is almost like nominating MVP: Most Valuable Primate. The rules of good and bad don’t apply*

    *the rules of awesome apply to MVP in case you were wondering.

    • MVP was ok, but I preferred the sequel, Most Vertical Primate. That ape was on a skateboard.

      • Did you know there is actually a third movie (of course). It is MXP: Most Extreme Primate. Jack becomes a snowboarder! The first one is the best. In college we attempted to make a custom Seattle Simian Jersey. It was bananas! (I’ll show myself out)

  15. This comment is going to get me down-voted worse than if I just said “The Sound of Music blows and kittens are the worst.” BUT, if worst can loosely be defined as popularity minus merit, then I think Avatar deserves serious consideration among these other suck bags.

    • If you would have said “The Sound of Music blows”, I would have upvoted the heck out of you. I hate it more than I hate kittens.
      The Sound of Music < Kittens

      • What the eff happened there? That was Supposed to be “The Sound of Music (less than symbol) Kittens”
        How can Stereogum commenters be so bad at thoughtfully and articulately stating preference for comparable, aesthetically similar musicians and so good at not having half of said statements of preference not disappear?

  16. I nominate Year One because I admire many people involved with this film, and it serves as a reminder that even those we respect and admire can make mistakes and have lapses in judgment.

  17. Speaking of Michael Bay and Coke, I have a story for you all: Michael Bay was once a film studies major at the school where I am currently a film studies major. The final project for one of our classes is to make a short film that takes the audience through three emotional states. Apparently, when it came time for young Michael Bay to do that very same project, he decided the assignment was stupid and promptly ignored it. Instead, he made a COKE COMMERCIAL as his project. He got an F on the project and almost failed the course.
    The End.

    • Man. My last year in college, Steven Spielberg came back to finish the ONE CLASS he had left before he skipped out on his film degree to be famous. His final project submission was Schindler’s List. Haha — not. What a dick.

  18. What I find terrible about Armageddon is the insensitivity to the people who were actually there. The actual rough-necks that came home in the one spaceship had families, ya know?! Michael Bay hadn’t learned his lesson before he began shooting Pearl Harbor.

  19. Again, I humbly nominate 28 Days — the Sandra Bullock in hyper-rehab one, not the monster one with the similar name. It is just really bad.

    • You know, 28 Days is one of those terrible movies that I enjoy for no real reason. Maybe it’s because of my undying love for both Viggo Mortensen and Dominic West. I don’t now. I’m not embarrassed about it, though.
      Also, one of my friends who also loves that movie, rented 28 Days Later thinking it was the sequel to 28 Days. Boy was she surprised!

  20. Dear Videogum,
    I fully intend to get the phrase “Bruce Willis is my constant” tattoo’d on my body. Then I shall be your king.
    Sincerely,
    El Grapadura

  21. I nominate Bri….. meh, forget it.

  22. Sergio’s White Hot B Roll!

  23. Embarrassing to admit, but I live about 20 minutes away from that town in the first stock footage picture. It’s also where they filmed the parade at the end. It’s Sanger, Texas and it actually looks like that all the time still. If you take a right at the giant Coca-Cola add there is an excellent Babe’s Chicken Dinner house where female waitresses will serenade you with Patsy Cline songs at your table whilst you eat. I’m not kidding.

    • Holy shit, I never realized this. (Must’ve gotten space dementia.) I’ve eaten at that Babe’s several times –great chicken fried steak. The singing? So so. (I used to live in the nearby metropolis of Krum. I know…)

  24. I am so sick of nominating Nick of Time. I don’t know what else I have to say. It’s just going to have to be the sleeper Worst Movie of All Time. All of the cool kids will know Nick of Time is really the worst and all you grandpas can have your Rachels Getting Married and your Caliguli.

  25. Oh man, this is one of those movies my Mom ends up watching on TBS all the time even though she owns it on DVD, just like Independence Day… I would like to add one thing to this review. Animal Crackers. There is nothing sexier than an Animal Cracker on a naked chick. I bet Michael Bay wishes he had saved this trick for Megan Fox in his trailer. However, if there’s one thing Armageddon does do really well it’s make me nostalgic for those creepy days of Steven Tyler sexualizing his daughter in weird music videos.

  26. Wait, there is really a scene with the twin towers burning in this movie? Shouldn’t we be more than a little concerned that Michael Bay is some kind of GYPSY FORTUNETELLER?!?!?!?!?!
    If, in a couple of years, my microwave becomes sentient and turns out to act like a racially insensitive stereotype, I’m going to be extremely upset.

    • Upset because your microwave became sentient and turned out to act like a racially insensitive stereotype, or upset because Michael Bay, of all people, can tell the future?

  27. I’m still convinced the B-Roll guy is a Delahaye. Stop pimping out your cousins’ pet projects, Gabe!

  28. I just want to sympathize with Gabe’s friend because I have borderline-comical emotional reactions to almost everything. I’ve never seen Armageddon, but about 5 minutes ago I cried while watching a Tim Horton’s commercial, so I should probably never see Armageddon because I don’t think I can spare the moisture.

  29. Because no discussion of this movie is complete without this, I’m going to ask all the monsters to please open your Bible to page 18 (your Bible is I HATED HATED HATED THIS MOVIE by Roger Ebert) and join me in reading from Ebert’s classic review of Armageddon:

    There are several Red Digital Readout scenes, in which bombs tick down to zero. Do bomb designers do that for the convenience of interested onlookers who happen to be standing next to a bomb? There’s even a retread of the classic scene where they’re trying to disconnect the timer, and they have to decide whether to cut the red wire or the blue wire. The movie has forgotten that this is not a terrorist bomb, but a standard-issue U.S. military bomb, being defused by a military guy who is on board specifically because he knows about this bomb.

    Thank you. Go in peace.

  30. I cried at the end of this movie the first (and only) time I watched it. I was also 11.

  31. Let’s paint, exercise, and watch TV in the barn!

  32. I nominate The Invention of Lying. Please, please, please! The only movie I ever had a strong desire to walk out on but didn’t because apparently I like to go down with the ship.

  33. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  34. I have to admit that I like this movie as one of those guilty pleasure movies that you know is bad but you watch it every time it is on TV anyway. It is like the evil twin brother of The Shawshank Redemption. Maybe I have space dementia or something.

  35. I am sad that I can’t comment from work, because I wanted to steer this conversation toward Steve Buscemi’s epic space dementia. As you may recall, this dementia causes him to grab the nearest machine gun and begin firing. So sure, space dementia can exist, and sure, NASA might pack some heavy artillery for the mission — but when working under a tight deadline, why did the roughnecks take the time to unpack those machine guns?

  36. I, too, have cried while on the elliptical trainer! But only at Rudy and The Return of the King. I save my sweaty gym tears for the good shit.

  37. Yuck. Having now read the “Reset Button” post, I wish there was a “Delete button” here for my post in this thread. I’ll donate $10 to a relevant charity in penance, and go back to my previous stance of posting humorous absurdities and occasionally mocking those who cry in gym situations (Gabe’s friend, ManDMo, and Joe Rogan.)

  38. First of all, I commented once but I didn’t compliment this wonderful site. I love videogum and Gabe and all the staff (and the monsters). I don’t comment often, because of ESL problems (and mostly fear of being judged by all the wonderful monsters), but I just have to nominate a movie I haven’t been able to erase from my memory since early December. It’s the movie Butterfly with Stacy Keach and Pia Zadora. Oh what a terrible movie. Probably not the worst of all time, but I still have to put it up for your consideration.
    Thank you for this amazing site and keep up the excellent job!

  39. When people ask me why Videogum is one of the three sites on the whole wide internet that I actually like (you guys’ friends quiz you on your surfing behavior totes all the time, RIGHT?), I just say “AdBusters tombstone”. And they’re like, “Gotcha.” And look at each other funny.
    Thank you, Gabe.

  40. Please consider this my official nomination for Cadillac Records. This movie had all the potential in the world (amazing musicians, talented actors, compelling storyline, etc) but was far and away one of the more lazily written movies I think I’ve ever seen. Collectively, we monsters should buy the rights to the script and do it some justice.

  41. I nominate Avatar. Acting = THE WORST, the script =THE WORST, that creppy moment at the end where human guy and Avatar woman were cuddling= AWKWARD,

  42. Please please please let me get what I want….do Catch and Release.

  43. I nominate “I heart huckabees”. because i do not heart it.

    i’ll just pick a random quote from rotten tomatoes: “A high-concept, high-minded piece of pseudointellectual trash, “I Heart Huckabees” is one of those stink bombs the intelligentsia like to champion.”

  44. Oh, I beg you, The Happening! This movie’s got it all: atrocious acting, ridiculous plot, nonsensical dialogue AND people killing themselves in hilarious ways. Also Mark Wahlberg. As a teacher!

    • Seconded! By 10min in, I was all startled “Oh, is this a comedy?” but then I realised that no – it was just non-ironic appalling acting.
      Also add Zooey Not-so-secret Jerk.

  45. Oh, I beg you, The Happening! This movie’s got it all: atrocious acting, ridiculous plot, nonsensical dialogue AND people killing themselves in hilarious ways. Also Mark Wahlberg. As a teacher!

  46. I’m telling you, NELL is worst movie Gold (that’s a nod to the Olympics). You can also not do much worse than DROP DEAD FRED, in which Carrie Fisher lives on a giant antique paddle-wheel riverboat that would have to be worth millions and, iirc, sinks because of hilarious imaginary-friend shenanigans/crimes committed by a dangerously schizophrenic Phoebe Cates.
    I am thinking about withdrawing my earlier suggestion of NOTHING BUT TROUBLE, as even just hearing the title still, 10 years later, makes me feel sick in my soul. I don’t really want to read a whole review of it, which anyway might just be Gabe typing random letters with this nose while blind, fetal, and a weird husk of his former self, broken and scared.

  47. I hated this movie, so I only saw it once. However, wasn’t it the Mir space station, not the International Space Station? Because I don’t think the ISS existed at the time.

    At any rate, the fact that there was a GAS PUMP for REFUELING SPACE SHUTTLES on the station was just amazing. That’s how space travel works, you guys.

  48. Door in the Floor: because Smart People made the arduous task of being white look like a cake walk.

  49. Alright, I will once again nominate The Prime Gig starring Vince Vaughn. Its a movie about high stakes telemarketing, and I think thats about all I need to say to give you a clear indication of why this movie is terrible. I must be one of the only people ever to have seen this movie, or else it would have been nominated by now.

  50. My favorite scene in this movie is the montage just after NASA hires Bruce Willis to kill the big asteroid. Not only has Ben Affleck opened his own oil-drilling business (when just 24 hours earlier he was stranded on a rig in the South China Sea) but all of his other buddies have returned to various points across the globe and resumed their hilariously anecdotal lives, only to violently and surprisingly interrupted by government goons seizing them and taking them back to NASA HQ.
    I don’t think it would even be a possibility to explain the concept of verisimilitude to Michael Bay.

    Also, I would like to nominate two classic (and Academy Award-winning) movies that I saw for the first time over the weekend and absolutely HATED:
    MILDRED PIERCE (apparently it only takes half a day to get and die from pneumonia)
    STALAG 17 (Hogan’s Heroes is actually deft and subtle in comparison)

  51. Speaking of prescience, as some people were many comments above this one, did this movie predict, or somehow cause, 2008 presidential campaign shouts of “Drill, baby, drill”? Because if so I will never forgive it.

  52. I once again nominate “Art School Confidential”

  53. I nominate (500) Days of Summer and second AnAtomicBore’s nomination

  54. um duh, “ps. i love you.” starring gerald butler as a haunted block of wood and hillary swank as cooky “straight” woman (sorry after boys don’t cry, million dollar baby, and amelia, i have a hard time believing swank to be anyone but a-sexy- butch dyke).
    this movie puts “serendipity” to shame!

  55. I nominate I Know Who Killed Me. It has Lindsey Lohan in it and it is the worst movie of all time. It is comically horrible. Also I think she gets naked.

  56. I nominate Shutter Island. just got done with that bullshit festival

  57. mario bros / baseketball. classic bad

  58. I nominate Beyond a Reasonable Doubt, with Michael Douglas and Jesse Metcalfe. It was made to be torn apart by Gabe, so.

  59. I nominate that we decide another movie isnot a good movie.

  60. After having just spent way too long watching the following, I nominate The Box for the Worst Movie of All Time. I say with the utmost sincerity it is one of the worst movies I have ever seen – and I have seen many movies, many of them bad. It may not be the actual worst, but it is definitely in the running.

  61. I nominate SUNSHINE as the worst movie of all time.

  62. You’re doing the Lord’s work Gabe. Also, I nominate FEAST OF LOVE as the worst movie of all time.

  63. I’ll answer some questions for the cynical douche Gabe. Even though all questions could be answered with, “It’s a fucking movie.” It’s been a while since I’ve seen it but there are plenty of these you fucked-up on. The reason they didn’t shoot a bunch of nukes at it was cuz someone said something along the lines of “you could shoot all the nukes in the world and it wouldn’t stop it.” This someone was someone like the secretary of defense or someone from NASA, so yeah, you take their fucking word for it. Then you talk about how they need to land on an asteriod (sure) to drill in it (yes)…Your sarcasm doesn’t work as well when you have no knowledge of the subject at all; you’re a clown who writes articles online. Bruce Willis didn’t talk to Ben literally 24 hours later, he had like an 18 hour flight just to get to NASA, then like the next day he met the NASA team, then he had to fly out to wherever the hell Ben was at…Even my dumbass remembers this from years ago and you can’t even remember from the day before? Good one fuck-up. I doubt they tried to state how much respect they have for oil drilling, Bruce’s character (yeah, character, remember this is a fucking movie) is that classic badass assertive guy who was determined to get the job done…don’t look into it too much speedracer. Whining bitch. Maybe they got a BMW from a damn rental shop or NASA lent it to them, cuz they were both at NASA, not in their goddamn house back home. Use your damn brain to fill in some blanks. You don’t like any Michael Bay films? No transformers or Pearl harbor either? You sound like a complete douche who is so jaded you wouldn’t like any films. Goddamn turkey.

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