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Wait a second, wasn’t it just August, like, yesterday? Sorry, I know that is a total Conversation Topic for Dads. Every month, when Dads get their Official Newsletter, the first article is always an update on how no one can believe where the time goes any more than they could believe it last month. Next thing you know, I’m going to explain to you how when you are your age you think you have all the time in the world but you do not have all the time in the world, and that you will understand what I am talking about better when you are my age (55). But you will understand what I am talking about better when you are my age. Because where did all that time go?! Merry Huh-mas? Happy Whatdayisitmukah? Do you ever wish you had a universal remote FOR YOUR LIFE? Where are these guys when you need them?

Well, there is nothing to do but move forward. After the jump, the five Highest Rated comments as voted on by you, the Lowest Rated comment, and the Editor’s Choice.

This Week’s Highest Rated Comments

#5

In regards to Forest Whitaker’s direction; I don’t think it’s fair to criticize a guy with a lazy eye for having a lack of vision.

Posted by: Frank Lloyd Wrong in response to The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Hope Floats
Score = 66

[Ed. note: Booo! Yayyyy!]

#4

Ernest Goes to Camp, Saves Christmas, Goes to Jail, Gets Scared Stupid, Rides Again, Goes to School, Slam Dunks, Goes to Africa, and Joins the Army. Starring Jim Varney.

Posted by: dUb-iLL in response to Best New Party Game 13
Score = 68

#3

An ode to diamond dust:

Posted by: incredimarc in response to The Sex And The City 2 Poster Is A Piece Of Crap
Score = 70

#2

Well, as a racist and a supporter of Universal Heath Care I am offended.

Posted by: Mr. Hausfrau in response to Look At All Of These Racists!
Score = 70

#1

Napoleon Dynamite starring John Heder

Posted by: Jeff in response to Best New Party Game 13
Score = 71

[Ed. note: the number one comment this week created quite a FIRESTORM this week. DS3M nearly had a meltdown (and nearly earned himself Lowest Rated Comment with one of his retorts). The thing is, I don't even get it! Is the joke that Jeff doesn't know how to play the game? Is that the joke? Or is the joke that there actually is some kind of secret commenterati cabal against DS3M and people were voting Jeff up just to prove some kind of point? Sometimes you guys make me a little bit nervous. This is how Shutter Islands start!]

This Week’s Lowest Rated Comment

well, the thing is, i think you’re being selfish. my intention is to desensitize the community-at-large so that charla can once again frolick freely among us without fear of scaring/grossing-out anyone. imagine how she feels. imagine hoe oprah felt, wiping the pre-cum from charla’s cheek. i think it’s better for us all to find a way to love charla as she is right now. she can’t just point and click a new face, ya know.

but really, i just want to be accepted, so i may have to consider your request.

Posted by: mangum in response to Saturday Night Live: Shy Ronnie, My Ninjas!
Score = -49

[Ed. note: Yikes! This was mangum's first thread, and he or she clearly got off on one of the wrongest foots. And OK, I'm not sure that I buy into mangum's false puffed-up stupid-on-purpose argument of only using an avatar that people found inappropriate in order to provide someone on Oprah with a better life (huh?). But the offending avatar in question, which I did not even see, has been replaced, and I get the sense that mangum seriously wants to be part of the club. And you have to admit that sometimes you guys can take some WARMING UP. So relax, technomonsters, and let's see where this goes. Good luck, mangum!]

This Week’s Editor’s Choice

A. Always

B. Be

C. turning into Crows

Posted by: Josh Ya’ll in response to Fading Of The Cries Is Tommy Wiseau’s The Room But With Swords!

[Ed. note: LOLz are for closers.]

Internet Commenter
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Comments (184)
  1. As a first time Balla, I would like to thank Google images and my freshman year Photoshop teacher.

  2. I got the joke as that Jon Heder has done anything else (except that Will Ferrell ice skating movie – but that doesn’t count). And I LOLed.

  3. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    • Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

      • If ever there was a time to ban someone Gabe….

        • WHAT!? oh lord…

          • If you wanted to be in the club you would have not changed back to the horrifying avatar. I want you to have a fun time, I want to give you an e-back rub and welcome you, just change that one thing mate.

        • i mean, i’m mostly kidding. but.

          Terms & Conditions:
          “Without limitation of the foregoing, you agree to not use the Web Site or Services to:”
          “Act in a manner that negatively affects other users’ ability to engage in the Web Site or Services;”

          • woah, way to make me feel like an ass :( I did mention that I want him to be part of the community, but he has been warned about the picture, and it brings the whole mood down. Instead of us discussing funny things that Gabe writes about, we end up talking about some annoying troll, and Videogum is better than that.

            But by posting that did you not just break exactly the same rule? Is the universe broken yet?

          • i think it really means, like, fucking with the website. but i like to use it as a catch-all. it entertains me. no real animosity here. just grossed out by the pictures. lots of love, little smiling vacuum!

          • Our Terms & Conditions are part standard online forum legalese, and part stuff I put in there to justify banning publicists from commenting under multiple fake names to lie about how great their clients are. For example.

            All you guys need to know is: use your judgment.

            If you are regularly ruining other monsters’ Videogum experience, ur doin it wrong. And you’re on notice!

          • Define “ruining”.

        • Relax, TechnoCoolVeteranBlogpostCommenter. You don’t have clout, dog.

      • YIKES, mangum. I was actually kind of “meh” about your choice of avatar before, but pulling out “That’s your girlfriend” for this situation makes me think that either you are heartless or you don’t grasp the (not exceptionally subtle) nuances of the “that’s your boy/girlfriend” joke. (Where’s werttrew for Official Videogum Historian stuff when you need him?)

    • Hey you went back to that avatar.

      BOOOO!

    • I feel like everyone in here just needs to relax. Relax AND come do body shots off my abs. You’re welcome in advance, ladies. And you too, guys!

      –Dylan “the bitchuation” Toxicated

    • Here mangum, at least use this for Monsters’ sake.

      • Hmm. Now that it’s up I’m not even comfortable with what I’ve done.

        Shit.
        Nah. It’s just distasteful, no matter how you guss it up.
        mangum, new avatar please!

        • No offense, but I think that’s much, much worse. It kinda means that you’re not offended by magnum’s use of the image, but by having too look at someone’s tragedy because it grosses you out. Which, not to defend magnum, was exactly his/her point in the lowest-rated comment.

          • Slippery slope!

          • Also, you have 11 upvotes? Yikes!
            I think you’re great KajusX, and I know you felt that photoshop was in poor taste, but it’s weird that magnum can get downvoted for having the original, but you have a score of 11 for making it funny.
            And I’m not above the fray here. I laughed. And then I :( ‘d at myself for laughing.

          • In all seriousgumness, I’m with you, That One. That woman had her face torn off by a monkey. It’s tragic. To make it one’s avatar is… not a good decision. Avatars are supposed to generally be humorous (moustachio’d lions! Death personified!).
            It was definitely in poor taste for mangum to use this woman’s tragedy as their avatar, with talk about pre-cum and everything.

            It kinda means that you’re not offended by magnum’s use of the image, but by having too look at someone’s tragedy because it grosses you out.

            That’s not what I meant for it to mean at all.
            In my attempt to bring humor to the avatar, by giving one without a face some semblance of a ‘joke’ face, I realized I made it much, much worse.
            It’s just a bad avatar.
            Believe me, I’ve gotten used to looking at her ‘face’ by now.
            It’s still not funny.

          • if anything, you spell out the hypocrisy well. no, it’s not crazy ass heavy hypocrisy. and yes, i, in retrospect, chose an avatar that is way too offensive to people. but come on. fucking gabe had to get on and threaten me? i didn’t start shit with people, i didn’t make fake profiles, and didn’t do shit but pick a photo that people are really getting too fucking insane about. because of pussies and faggots reproducing, i suppose. also, i am blabbing now and who cares? thanks for the fun week videogum!

          • The real tragedy here is that someone always has to come and fuck up the fun for everybody. Your not challenging anyone’s perceptions by stirring up shit, you just wanna see what shit smells like. Can’t we go back to “none of this shit matters in the real world, but its funny and I like it so I am enjoying myself” instead of “lets all bitch and then apologize and then maybe bitch somemore”"?

          • Whoa! Selfrighteousnessgum.com over here! My personal apologies in advance for anyone who finds evolution or Miley Cyrus offensive!

          • I really don’t think I’m being self-righteous (I beat myself up for stuff like that constantly), and I wasn’t trying to call out any so-called “hypocrisy” as magnum puts it. I just thought it was weird that KajusX’s photoshop got a positive response for using the same image that magnum did.

          • The last thing I want to address on this matter, That One, is you generalizing what I did with the image of Charla Nash’s mutilated face, saying I’m using the same image mangum did but am getting upvotes instead of downvotes. (Also please note that we are still in agreement that my image still does not work for all the reasons we’ve already stated, and we are also in agreement that my post should not be getting upvotes).

            But maybe the knee-jerk reaction by the VGum Monsters to upvote my image of Charla Nash’s face with a fake, bespectacled nose, eyebrows and mustache photoshopped on was a reaction based in relief that there was at least an attempt at humor to relieve us all of our very base instinct to reel in horror and sadness at the COMPLETELY devastated, destroyed face of a woman brutally mauled by a chimp, and the flagrant, disrespectful use of the image by mangum. Maybe my post with the altered image is getting upvotes simply because it’s anything BUT Miss Nash’s absolutely tragic situation.

            Yes, we know it’s not right to find humor in it. I think if my post did anything it illustrated this point VERY well. I said as much immediately after I posted it. It wasn’t funny to use her portrait as an avatar, and even when the image was altered, it still did nothing to correct the disrespect this woman was being given by someone choosing to use her tragedy as their punchline.
            I agree that my photoshopped image shouldn’t be getting upvoted, as it was a failed attempt at making something terrible not terrible.
            But let’s not fool ourselves by having you state that I’m being upvoted for using the SAME image mangum did. The context is different, and the image was most definitely altered.
            Like I said before, and to once again borrow from last weeks Monster’s Ball’s comments-
            It’s a slippery slope.

          • I just think berating someone because their totally good-natured comment got upvoted is supremely douchey. Like, just calm down, right? It’s not like upvotes represent real-life Karma Points or whatever! You’re fine, Kajus.

          • I think we may have a sukiyaki western django on our hands

    • thanks, gabe, now this is our fucking boyfriend.

    • Mangum, good grief! Just change your avatar!

      You’re clearly just trying to annoy everyone now, and to be completely honest I do not have the time for whatever 1-player game you are playing. Change your avatar or I will ban you.

      • Gabe, will you be eating your Words at the pizza party?

      • Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

        • Actually, I would have cared a lot less about your avatar if you hadn’t already changed it to the Pokemon, or whatever that was. I’m not too concerned by people being offended by 150-pixel avatar images, since I am sure that we all have better things to do.

          Although, let’s not pretend like your selection of a photograph of a mutilated woman was some kind of act of bravery, like you picked it just to open all of our sheeple eyes to the sometimes horrific realities of the world we live in. That is absurd. (And a fucking lie!)

          But the fact is that you changed your avatar as some kind of good-will gesture towards the community, and then, once you had been “forgiven” in this post/thread, you changed it back as a pretty base-level aggression against people who were offended. So, whatever the point you’re making here about making fun of people on this site, which is really reductive and kind of pointless if we’re going to get into any kind of specifics (you’re mad that I made a joke about Whoopi Goldberg referring to Roman Polanski’s drugging and sodomization of a 13-year-old girl as “rape-rape” one time?), the reality is that you are basically just trying to be obnoxious at this point. So, you can complain that this has something to do with integrity and the open exchange of opinions, but personally I just think that you’re being kind of a dick. And we actually have an Official Policy on Dicks. (That is the policy that she wrote.)

          In any case, you’re now banned simply for calling everyone “faggots.” That is hate speech, and that is against the rules. Bye!

        • There’s no need to be mean.

          Bees happy!

          [URL="http://www.creepygif.com/image.php?i=877"][IMG]http://www.creepygif.com/images/thumb/877.jpg[/IMG][/URL]

        • “I’ll troll ’till you love me faggots”
          - Magnum RIP

          “I would like to think that in a time of black presidents and openly gay women Houston mayors that we would no longer use words like “faggot” to intimidate those who do not agree with us into feeling weak for being offended. Being gay is not being weak.”
          - Monkey

          “Top five banned users list on Twitter!”
          -Werttrew


          -Kenny Powers

  4. The joke is no one likes one-hit wonder, Jon Heder. Can’t even spell his name correctly.

  5. Okay, so here’s what happened. When I saw the rules for this Party Game, I quickly searched for “one-hit wonder actors” on Google, and I would then post such a thing EARLY in order to usurp everyone else’s upvotes. I am well aware of the fact Jon Heder has starred in movies other than Napoleon Dynamite, and I only did this for my own selfish gain, which was in the words of my d-bag friends “a total dick move” and ignited a firestorm of negative energy (which me and DS3M have made up over! we follow each other on Twitter!).

    I sincerely apologize for taking away any upvotes for people who played the game by the rules, and I am a terrible, unfunny person.

    • Uh no you did fine. You brought the funny. Don’t apologize.

    • Dude, It’s totally fine, It was never about your comment inasmuch as it was about the reaction to (what I initially thought was) a non joke. I have since reversed course on this issue.


      And Keep it up Teach (werttrew) – I’ll tell the dean you’ve been smokin doobs with Johnny (JFK) Franchetti behind the Library.

    • Oh…. NOW I Get It!!!

  6. But he DIDN’t remove the avatar, Gabe! I still see it! He’s still using it!

    • C’mon! I had too! I’ll go back to Jigglypuff just as soon as I win the comment with the least votes for next week. “Win” is so subjective.

      • I’m going to upvote you. The worst insult I can think of!

      • Your sense of humor’s upside down.

        • to borrow the phrase “seriousgum” – I don’t think what happened to her is funny. Might have been poor choice to use that pic, but when the hate-storm started, I had to have fun with it. With all the things people hate on and make fun of on this site… I find humor in those full of judgments drawing an arbitrary line and getting noble. But whatevs… I’ll change the pic later… THANKS AGAIN FOR THIS MOMENT OF FUN!

          • Of course there’s a line! The definition of Avatar (not the definition) is supposed to be something light-hearted or pop-culturey. If I made my avatar a picture of Auschwitz victims or Southern lynchings or Emmett Till or some other real-life horrifying tragedy, EVERYONE would agree that it would be in poor taste and I would DESERVEDLY be kicked off of Videogum. Your picture is not AS offensive as those hypotheticals (the woman lived) but still, awful.

          • Seriously, sometimes I think that my avatar is crossing the line. Poor bird! But then I remember how nature works.

      • It’s not funny, it’s saddening. Please change it, or else I’ll go to your account, and downvote EVERY ONE OF YOUR COMMENTS!!!!!!!!!!!

        Scared?…
        You should be.

      • Da Cake Eatur, you tricky motherfucker.

        • I WISH! But thanks. Da Cake Eatur inspired me, no doubt. But really, I wasn’t even trying. It was just a picture I chose.

          • So why don’t you choose something else??
            You say you want to make fun of the shitstorm that started over this picture, but a) how is this making fun of it and b) YOU’RE STILL USING THE FUCKING PICTURE. Don’t you see the problem here? You may amuse yourself with your second-week-in-a-row-most-donwvoted-comment, but, hey it’s at the expense of LADY WITH HER FACE TORN OFF. C’mon, son. You know that ain’t right.

          • Yes, I was wondering what happens when someone goes for laughs (or lesson-teaching?) by posting a photo of some poor woman who has had her face rape-raped. So I googled “shitstorm” (because that is a thing that people do). Observe:


            And that is why we don’t teach lessons.

          • Dammit, let’s try that embed again… cue: shitstorm!

            And THAT is why we don’t teach lessons.

        • do not use his name in vain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  7. …Is it sad that immediatly after I post a comment, I upvote it to help myself get on the week’s best comment just once?

    • UPVOTE

      (this one’s going to do it for you, i can feel it)

    • When I first started commenting, I did that for a while. Then I felt dirty. Now, the only time I vote on my comments is when it’s terrible or I make an egregious grammatical error.
      I’m sure a lot of self-upvote (coined!), so I don’t think it’s sad.

      • I abstained from self-upvoting™ for a long time, and then I tried it once. I had always heard that you don’t get high your first time. Soon I was self-upvoting™ during my lunch-break at work. Before I knew it, I was self-upvoting™ in the bathroom whenever I could. I lost my job and now I’m running out of money for my self-upvoting™ habit. My wife left me, my family disowned me, and I can’t qualify for anymore credit cards. Totally worth it.

      • Same. I didn’t self-upvote for the longest time, then I did all the time, and now I seldom do.
        I stopped doing it because once I checked on my profile late one Friday afternoon and saw that every single one of my last ten comments had dropped by exactly one point. I strongly suspect Gabe removes self-upvotes before the Ball of commenters who seem likely to be in the top five, rendering them moot for purposes of the Ball.

        So now I don’t bother to upvote myself unless I genuinely find myself amused by my own comment (sad!) or I feel I’ve been unfairly downvoted (still sad). Nowadays I probably downvote myself almost as often as I upvote myself.

        • I find it hard to believe Gabe cares enough to knock down people’s votes (God, for his sake I hope not). Probably just some dude who doesn’t like the cut of your jib went to your userpage and knocked you down a notch literally.

        • This is precisely the situation that started my crusade for some Metrics, so we can see just who up or down votes (Karma Points works That One). I have personally witnessed all of my comments for a week get downvoted by someone who just doesnt like me. Obvioulsy clicking on the commenter profile and “really letting me have it.”
          On the other end, I get the AnAmPat treatment, where as SOON as I comment, it’s at -1, like its simply a reaction to my name, not even paying attention to a comment.

          I really don’t want this to be what I am about on videogum, it’s certainly not on any other sites. But I feel like at some point, there was a collective thought that said Downvote this guy because he doesn’t like it. And I get it. Antagonizing someone over the very thing they dislike is a classic technique.

          So From here on out I will not be mentioning votes of any type. It has long since ceased being something that gives me joy or a larff to discuss and instead is starting to point to something else, both about the general videogum population at large and specifically about me. I don’t want these conclusions drawn any further out, so I will cease to bitch about this.


          That said, I really want some of you smart assholes out there that think you know just what exactly proper posting decorum is here on VG to go ahead and make me a list. So I can see where the line is, shout at it, yell and scream at the line (as I am prone to do)
          and in doing so, not be a habitual line-stepper like Mr. Mangum/Da Cake Eatur Jr. proved to be. Multiple posts? I reply to myself often (for a while I wanted that to be MY THING). I try not to overpost or put it in stupid one liners unless I giggle. And you know what? If I want to post 10 out of the 30 comments on a board fine. You guys can downvote away if you want to. I get it. Thats why the Internet is great.


          In sum, I love you monsters, I love my time here, I love to laugh with you guys, I love to have inside jokes with you guys. I don’t need love or upvotes, but I don’t need to be constantly downed like I am a bad internetter. Cuz I am a good one. If you came to Chicago I would be the dude helping you out, telling you you dropped something back there, or telling you how to transfer trains to get to where you gotta go. Not cuz I’m a tour guide but because that’s who I am – a dude that likes helping in real life and trying to be funny in internet Lyfe. If I fail on the funny, that’s fine too; and I don’t expect to win people’s hearts and minds and votes and parlay that into a successful commenting career where I am loved the world over and become president in the first internet election. Cuz that’s stupid. And that jobs taken anyway – Werttrew 2024.


          Snark:
          It’s a good thing I’m not going to the meetup of the Gummalos for pizza and videos of pizza. Because I don’t have a shirt with a big downward red arrow on it. And if I wore it, I’d get downvoted because you would all think it’s a joke about my cock.

          • democracygum?

          • It has been a long time since I’ve posted and I’ve even admittedly neglected my duties as a Monster, so much so that I dare say I feel like a fraud right now. BUT I promise to drop by more regularly so that I don’t feel like I’ve missed an entire chapter in the monstergum saga (I will use werttrew’s sparknotes to catch up on what I’ve missed).
            So somewhere in my absence, I’ve missed the whole down-voting of DS3M, but from your comments in this post you seem pretty sincere and I think, these days, that is what counts the most for us Monsters. Once upon a time, I think–or at least it felt like–it was snark that earned you the MVP of commenting, but then somewhere along the line we started started to pay more attention to each other and then “shit just got real!” And Lindsay’s passing (may she rest in peace) made us one big monster family, brought together by the tragedy of our broken home.
            Obviously, that is not to say that being funny isn’t still the ultimate goal, because duh. But even not being very funny (or at least not as funny off-the-cuff as many of you are) will still be tolerated if it’s an earnest attempt (I think). Although, it does help if you’re self-aware enough to realize when your joke bombs or your wit just wasn’t as witty as you thought, and a few down-votes are probably in your cards. Being only moderately internet-funny myself, I tend not to down-vote people for “not being funny enough”, but more so if people are just offensive or the joke is so bad that it becomes offensive or if you end your comments by calling us “faggots” (or calling anyone faggots for that matter). I’m sure you’ve been around long enough to have picked up on all this yourself, but just thought I’d offer my 2¢. And also, where were you when I was trying to get to Union Park and accidentally took the green line (or orange–still can’t remember) to the wrong end of Ashland and realized that I probably wasn’t heading in the right direction once I could see Comiskey Park passing by out the window?!? (It turned into a long day :[ )

        • I honestly try not to think about it too much, but I do click that little green arrow if a day or two has gone by and a joke I am especially proud of goes seemingly under-appreciated. I tend to think that some jokes are lonely and need a little company. But I’m just a bit trigger happy with upvotes in general (read: easily amused). Certain comments just make me get a giant stupid grin on my face at work, and I get the “you already voted for this comment” error fairly regularly. You monsters just crack me up so much, that I loose short-term memory function.
          When something doesn’t have any need for a self-upvote (Tobias is kind of a trump card), I abstain!

      • Self-upvote is too long. what about s’upvote?
        i mean, i was reading incredimarc’s post and was like, ugh, LETTERS!

  8. gabe, i love you, but gimme a break. pre-cum???? normally i wouldn’t feel the need to defend myself on an internet messageboard (that’s a lie, normally i would feel the need), but i think me and The New Sound were pretty spot-on with this…

    can we have a VG community vote on this or something?

  9. Mr Hausfrau’s comment was one of my favourite ever. So, here Mr Hausfrau, have my heart, take it. Cherish it.

    • thank you for the lovely…uh gift. But of course I cannot accept your heart. Save it for someone who can return the favor… or is that favour? Are you Canadian? I do have a weakness for Canadians. And sweets…and especially sweet Canadians. But seriously, chocolate: I accept chocolate and money.
       
      …and praise from strangers it seems.
      Thanks to all the monsters! much love.

  10. Lissen guys, I like being here, I don’t want to be a Troll (never tried to be, I guess it just happened in some people’s opinions or minds, IDGAF) and I want to be friends, so Let’s start over.

    Hi, I’m DS, I’m hap

    • I suck, downvotes deserved

      • You Can Make It Up: DS3M Commits Suicide while tweeting

        • I flat-out like you because you look just like my red-nosed pit bull. You guys know you do this too. I’m a heavy drinker, what’s your excuse?

        • it’s funny because I don’t know why no one likes you(r comments) but I admit I’ve downvoted you for no other reason than it seems to bother you? Like when you take it personally and comment on your many many downvotes? So it turns out i’m in 3rd grade.
           
          but also I was just talking about this the other day. now I’m going to do something radical and upvote every comment you comment from now until I forget. but not on this page…because i can only vote once ((whoops))

          • See that instance I understand. It was when it first started off with all the craziness where EVERY comment I put in gets a negative almost instantly. It just gets old I dont need upvotes necessarily, I just don’t want to be unjustly downvoted. And in the instance of the comments that were referenced or mentioned, I can see how and why I would deserve a downvote.

            It just feels like, lately, we’ve been turning into stereogum. I don’t like that.

          • There are two regular commenters who seem to get downvoted much more than they deserve: DS3M and Napoleon Dynamite. Not saying that they don’t occasionally deserve to have negative scores, but they always seem to have about 20 percent fewer votes than they should, as far as I can tell from the quality of their comments. So I try to upvote Napoleon Dynamite and DS3M slightly more often to make up for it.

          • I think it’s mostly because they comment so much, sometimes saying just completely pointless things. I guess it’s like familiarity breeds contempt? I don’t know, even though they get annoying sometimes, I don’t ever downvote the regulars. Except that time Napoleon hated on Queen. Some things are sacred!

          • I see that we agree.

          • I finally extrapolated that you were referring to me by Napoleon Dynamite. Honestly, I didn’t even notice I wasn’t getting that many upvotes. I also didn’t notice I was commenting an annoying amount. I guess I have no social intelligence even on the internet!

          • The vibe I get is that there is a little backlash against posting more than 2-3 times/thread (please don’t count my posts in this thread before you vote!). Almost like people feel like someone’s trying too hard and resent the lack of brevity. The other person I notice who seems to get that backlash is David_notascynical. All 3 folks are pretty funny. DS, in particular, seems to garner the most hate. But, it’s definitely b/c his reactions to downvoting are hilarious.

            Downvote away!

            PS – ModernMANdroid was right! This is quite a blackhole we’re creating!

          • NAPOLEON and DS, YOU two can JOIN MY fuckin CLUB OF NO upvotes.

          • I’m proud not to please nor alarm this horde of the best and worst of America and Beyond.

        • You people that upvoted this so hard are kinda sick and obviously part of the problem.

  11. Anyway, about the Ball-
    Awesome! Two polar opposite hilarious entries for the movie game, a great photoshopped joke with an awesome AD reference, and a good old racism/healthcare joke!
    Thumbs up. It was a happy ending but I think I’m going to cry. Quick! Someone be my boyfriend and record me crying.

  12. Make fun of Forest Whitaker, get into the Monster’s Ball. Hornberger!

  13. I recently had a dream where I had made the best comment and had, for the first time, made the monster’s ball. I then woke up, realized my great comment was just a figment of my imagination, and became disheartened. Oh well. Congrats to everyone on a great comment week! Disatracted kitten party!

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

  14. Hey guess what guys, I’ve brought converts!

  15. mangum, I don’t know whether to upvote you so you don’t “win” next week or down vote because you’re still using it. I feel bad that we’re calling you out, but for the love of Gabe, switch it.

    Also, how do you start with Charla and move to Jigglypuff? Quite a transition.

    • i’m just ignoring the whole thing, i mean right? he/she is feeding on the attention? Besides, this is my ball today (or all of our balls but I’m #2 king, right?) and I’m not letting anyone poop on it.

      • Ha. All of our balls.
        (I’m 9 years old).

      • apologies. didn’t mean to poop. i really had no idea this could get like this. had a totally different idea about this little community. congrats on your funniness, i appreciate reading. peace

      • Who does #2 work for?! Sorry for the left field reference, but it seems like we’re all kind of brown-bagging it today.
        Congrats on your silver colored commemorative videogum plaque!

        • if you look at the “points” we kind of tied for silver (i guess *sigh*), so Congrats to you too! Our first ball! I hope you took pictures!
           
          in all seriousness, I did tell my mom and sister, though they did not really care.
          maybe when i’m #1 they’ll care.
          ….maybe you’ll all care.

          • Haha, yeah I considered b. l. a. w. g. g. i. n. g. about it, but I figured that the people that I work with that follow me probably don’t want to know that I spent time out of my day p-shopping a never-nude over a dinosaur – taking the most amount of time thinking of passable middle school wordplay. So I told my cat, and she was surprisingly interested and proud of me!

    • no doubt. all done. i just always thought jigglypuff was cute. if i could do those cool animations like everyone else, i would have the jig singing.

  16. Woah. First time I’ve seen it be all e-dramagum in here.

    Monsters be monsters.

  17. O RLY? Pictures, Images and Photos I think everyone just needs to settle down about this whole thing and look at kitten pictures. Oh look! They play pingpong!

  18. As Northern Lights–the Canadian supergroup who came together to record a single to raise money for apartheid, much like USA For Africa did–sang in 1985, “We can bridge the distance / Only we can make the difference / Don’t you know that tears are not enough?”

    In my mind, this applies to all of us. It’s probably the Nicaraguan hooch talking, though. (I’m currently in Central America)

  19. I’m watching you, Punk.

    Love,
    –My German Shepard

  20. Carrie,
    Come on. “Berated”? I hardly berated Kajus. I explained what I thought was wrong with the photoshop. That’s pretty much it. It’s not at all like I chewed him/her out. Not too many self-righteous indictments begin with “no offense” and continue with “I think you’re great”. I know you’re no fan of mine, but I think you’re reaching with this one.
    Sincerely,
    That Self-Righteous Supremely-Douchey One (trying to calm down)
    p.s. I really want to start referring to upvotes and downvotes as “Karma Points”. Negative Karma Points away!

    • Hay, it looks like you love the reply system too!

    • Uhhh look buddy. You basically told poor Kajus why he himself posted that image like he’s not aware of why he posted it, prefaced it with “no offense” as if that phrase has the power to make a statement unoffensive, and then went on to tell him that 11 people were wrong for finding his image funny enough to upvote, disingenuously including yourself in the judgment in order to make it not seem like a judgment, which it absolutely still is. I’m just wondering what your understanding of self-righteousness is?

      I also just want to say that responses to your comments comprise like 1% of the bulk of my comments on Vgum, if that, and furthermore I would say that the fraction of your comments I actually respond to is miniscule. So, no, I didn’t reach back into the far recesses of logic just to satisfy some compulsive need to e-spar with you. You’ll notice my head isn’t so far up my own ass that I neglected to hit “reply” to your comment. I’m saying that even though I know it’s meaner than you deserve and a lame insult because I’m not morally smug. If it makes you feel any better, I will just silently disagree with you from now on and not reply to anything you say. Starting…. NOW.

      • Damn, that slope is slippery!

      • Carrie, in the words of that Cajun lady on the Princess and the Frog commerical “Hush Up.” This is the internet! Lets all be our own illogical little gods and watch videos of Kittens typing things. AND IT”S CHRISTMAS!

        • Carrie, I’ve got zero hard feelings. I know I bring my seriousgum opinions to VG more than most, and sometimes my little dissents are out of place. It invites criticism, and of course I’m fine with that. I respect the intellect I see here, and sometimes I try to prod at it.
          There’s really not much more to be said about our little e-argument, so I’ll just say, “Who cares?” To borrow a phrase from our little iFight, I honestly think you’re great. You make me laugh (isn’t that the point?). You have a really interesting disconnect that’s rooted in internet bullshit, but anchored in real world cynicism. You have one of the most unique points of view on VG, and I wish we saw a bit more of you.
          Again, who cares? Come tomorrow, we’ll all be laughing at celebrity trampoline accidents together. Hopefully?
          Cheers? Cheers!

  21. I think Magnum should be renamed the “shrimp” who is even socially awkward on the internet.

  22. i don’t know that’s pretty insulting to me

  23. you comment multiple times, THATS YOUR THING! nice to meet you!

  24. I feel like I just came home from a week long trip and my kids basically Weird Scienced the house while I was gone. I mean I don’t have kids, but if I did and came home to something like that, I’d be like: “what the hell happened here while your mother and I were in the Pocanos!?”

  25. As a new monster I would like to point out that my avatar is both cute and not the victim of a monkey attack. I know how to take notes.

  26. Don’t change your name in a sad attempt to avoid me, motherfucker. I’ve been calling you all week. You think you can just switch up and come back to my house. I hate you! And I’m terminating the pregnancy.

  27. Hey coolforsale, glad to see you back.

    So can you tell me more about these avant garde tracksuits? I wanna be pushing some boundaries and make people think when they see me exercise.

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