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Whoa, you guys, I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, but Megan Fox is ssssssssssssssmokin’! (The Mask, now available on VHS and DVD.) Yeah, I just realized that Megan Fox is super hot and it’s weird that no one ever mentions how hot she is or the fact that she is really hot (HOT! HOT LADY!), and they never feature her as a hotso in movies, it’s always dowdy blah blah roles for her. (Can you believe Sarcasm Day is finally here?!)
Obviously everyone either thinks and/or recognizes that Megan Fox is (or is at least considered) very attractive*. Her entire career is centered around her acting ability face and chest and body. Well, America, Saturday Night Live is about to blow the lid off this whole Megan Fox is hot thing. Wait, how do you blow the lid off something? Do you gently reinforce it and make predictable jokes about it?
BOOM! The wool has been pulled from your eyes, Sheeple. THE TRUTH (ABOUT MEGAN FOX’S BEING HOT) IS OUT THERE! It might actually be out there too much. That truth won’t shut up.
In other news: I’m going to watch Saturday Night Live this weekend!
*Megan Fox is attractive, sure, but Megan Fox also looks like she had some work done on her Surrogate (Surrogates in theaters September 25th) if you know what I mean. There’s an indoor Megan Fox and an outdoor Megan Fox, and the only difference is that the outdoor Megan Fox is more attractive, and made out of metal, and liquid plastic, and gnashing robotic teeth.
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now that you mention it, she doesn’t reeeallly look like a person.
She’s got that down to earth, girl next door thing going for her. If I were a slightly overweight twelve year old who happened to have a yellow rose and I ran into her on the street, I’d give it to her to show my appreciation. I’m sure she’d graciously accept because she just can’t get used to fame and she’s still so surprised every time someone actually recognizes her.
If there’s one person who you think has a wonderful vagina, but is actually harboring teeth (see: VAGINA DENTATA), it’s Megan Fox.
ugh. Seriously, vagina dentata is the bane of my fucking life. Leave my little acorn alone bitey vaginas.
Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now?
Nah, my penis simply resembles an acorn. Small, triangular, insignificant.
That’s what Obama said to congress…
Except his is dodecahedron shaped
I’m telling Mom that boys are talking about their linuses in the comments! (Mom is Gabe. Dad is also Gabe. This is why we’re all screwed-up monsters!)
I bet she’d be no fun. Ball pits are fun. Attractive metal ladies who wear very little clothes are not fun. Wait…
Some days, I’m like “idk, my bff jill” and other days, I’m like “idk, my bff rose.”
The point is, Megan Fox always makes me feel all “idk, my bff rose,” as she is not even in my top 20 CILFs.
I want to see her go all meltdown status and do something absurd, like act. Decently.
When I read “meltdown”, I got the image of Megan Fox melting in a vat of molten lava T-1000 style. Surely, that’s the only way to destroy her.
Maybe it’s because it’s still kind of early but I sort of laughed at ‘keep your boob in your pants’. (I’m sorry.)
Yea, that’s interesting and all, but I was just trying to read the text on her boob the whole time, so….
I’m sorry, I do not get this “hottest woman in the world” label. Yeah, she’s got an excellent body, but other than that she’s attractive in a really generic way, and I’m convinced most guys like her because she looks like the type that wouldn’t hesitate to give you a hand job under the bleachers in high school.
Downvote away.
No, you’re pretty much right on. She makes me think of a girl I went to high school with who was really cute, but dressed in baggy clothes, was obsessed with Korn, and very obviously needed a shower. All my friends said that she wanted me to ask her to prom, and that if I took her I’d almost definitely get laid. She was visibly disappointed when I didn’t ask her. Seriously, wtf was wrong with me? I know I was trying to be all respectful and feminist, but shit, that was win-win down the board.
If by generic you mean, like a cross between a transgendered Thai prostitute and a raccoon, then yeah, generic.
She always looks like Eliza Dushku to me, if Eliza Dushku had run away from home at the age of twelve and grown up on the street corners of Hollywood until some kind porno producer took her in, if you know what I mean.
Does Megan Fox know the rule is “No bad tattoos after Sarcasm Day”?
Megan Fox looks like she smells like a stripper.
I’m not even sure what that means but it sounds bad.
I know exactly what you mean. How a girl seems to smell is a big indicator of attractiveness for me. Zooey Deschannel for example, looks like she smells amazing. like strawberry vanilla. (i feel creepy all of a sudden). Angelina Jolie, however, more like cheese or something. Just Ideas.
The sad thing (sad means predictable, right?) about Megan Fox is how much she’s already become terrified of her inevitable fall from grace. You know how some actresses are really really hot and everyone loves how hot they are, and then they eventually realize that’s the only reason they’re loved, so they start to fear the end of that honeymoon and stop eating and workout too much until they turn into creepy Angelina Jolie/Madonna scarecrow versions of their former selves who could actually still be very very hot and pretty except they are now too pale skinny, sickly, and muscular?
Yeah, that’s now happening to Megan Fox. RIP, her breasts.
The difference between her during the Transformers 2 press tour and the one she’s doing for Jennifer’s Body is like night and day.
That’s an awful lot to read into someone’s apparently vanishing mammaries.
Seen Renee Zellweger recently?
can we honestly say that people only valued renee zellweger for her face/body? because, as someone who has stared at her face on a big screen for the duration of a film, i find that hard to believe. though, she’s not an especially good actress, either, so that would certainly explain all the roles she’s gotten. but it’s definitely not her face. seriously.
Jennifer’s Body was awesome… keep quiet, haters
Hey, Lindsay!
I can’t believe I watched a 30-second ad just to watch a minute’s worth of ads.
My favorite part was when Megan Fox talked about that prickly feeling in her armpits.
Yes yes that’s all well and fine, but what is Megan Fox DOING about my prickly underarms?
She’s attractive but she’s not a thinking man’s type of a attractive, which I am. I mean I’m a thinking man; not a woman that is attractive in a thinking man’s sort of way. Blergh! I don’t know what I’m trying to say. Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing making sense.
Seriously, the SAT should be replaced by a test in which you’re offered the opportunity to sleep with either Tina Fey or Megan Fox, and if you pick Megan Fox, you FAILED, son!
No, I see what you’re saying [I think]. I agree. I mean, she’s obviously insanely attractive, but she’s also REALLY DUMB which is a very unattractive quality. I think she’s gorgeous but I wouldn’t sleep with her because duhduhdumb.
She had no plans to eat ANY of that sandwich. I can picture the poor interns off camera holding many napkins in dreaded anticipation.
The first time I ever heard of Megan Fox was in the context of her and Brian Austin Green talking about how much sex they had. Somehow, this left me completely immune to her charms.
Megan Fox is the girl in high school who all the girl hated, and who the boys always defended because “She’s just misunderstood.” But she wasn’t misunderstood and all the girls hated her because she gave everyone’s boyfriend hand jobs under the bleachers.
Am I the only one who LOLed at all of the clips? Just me? Alright, I’ll see myself out.
The time to pass judgment on Megan Fox is not now. That time will come in 15-20 years when she makes her first denial of or admission to receiving “rejuvenating” plastic surgery. If she’s straight up about it, we will be allowed to love her. As for now, she is too willing to think that Diablo Cody is smart for me to be unbiased.
I’ll go ahead and pass judgment on her now, if you don’t mind. I’ve seen enough.
Hey Megan Fox! Wanna trade shirts?
On another note, Andy Samberg looks like a young Freddie Mercury, if he just grew his hair a little longer. Just sayin’.