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This is how dreams are made! From Craigslist:
Sure! Now you’re a Hollywood millionaire. Just send all your money to totallylegitimateemailaddress@hollywoodmovies.com and wait for Jerry Bruckheimer to call you.
“Congratulations, we’re equals.”
–Jerry Bruckheimer
Now that you’ve wisely invested your children’s college funds into a super reasonable business venture that’s just like how Steven Spielberg does it, it’s time to take a look at the project itself:
You can FUHGETTABOUT your old life. Now you are a fat cat, sleeping on a bed of Fandango money just like Dax Shepard.
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Are you saying you don’t have faith in craigslist ads? You’ll never get to dance in a locally produced hip hop video with that attitude!
I’m too scared that I’d end up having to talk to Eli Roth to reply to this ad.
Who the fuck has enough self hatred to write a screen play without the power to choose the music and actors used?
when i am using my return on saw IX to bail myself out of jail, we’ll see who’s laughing…
One sentence is enough to sell me. I mean, my own screenplay, concerning zombie aliens that form a high school marching band from Deluth, MN, who march in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and lay their eggs in Katie Couric’s chest, is sitting unfunded in a corner collecting dust. So I understand. We all have visions, if not the means to realize them.
“The plot? Um, well it’s about this guy, he’s kind of an idiot, real, real gullible, and he sees this ad on Craigslist and he shows up to meet this guy who posted this ad with his money in hand and the guy comes out of nowhere and stabs him to death. Then he rapes his corpse and cuts into pieces……Yeah, yeah. Saturday’s good for me.”
“It ain’t rape if it’s dead.” — Juggalo wisdom
This is how Jennifer’s Body was made.