Photos
As quickly as it came, it was gone. You feel me, ninjas? It’s hard to believe that four days of helicopter rides, men on stilts, barbecue, and rape could fly by so quickly. If only there was a way to freeze time and stay in a perfect moment forever! But there is no such way.
Of course, we were all too crunked (or whatever the word is that Juggalos use that means crunked. “Very high on methamphetamines”?) to have documented any of it. Besides, no one wanted that detachment from the experience. If you’re photographing the moment, you’re not living the moment, you know what I mean, motherfucker? Luckily, artist (whatever that means) Derek Erdman was there to capture some of our memories on film, where we can enjoy them all over again, and again, and again, forever. He didn’t even seem like that much of a neden hole! Mostly a nice dude. If you put some 10-gauge plugs in his ears and tattooed a spider on his throat, he would have reminded me of your mom.
Anyway, after the jump, a trip (oh man, tripping BALLLZ) down memory lane.
You crazy, ninjas, you crazy. Hold me tight and don’t ever let me go!
More photos of the family here. (Thanks for the tip, Jacob, Mara, and Ryan.)
Previously: That’s Your Gathering: The 10th Annual Gathering Of The Juggalos
The Gathering Of The Juggalos Survival Guide
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Juggaloriffic! I’m pretty sure if I would have known several people if I’d attended. Much love, Southern Illinois!
25% of these photos refer to fornicating with dead animals. At first I was like “wow, that seems like a high percentage of references to fucking dead animals” but on second thought, that percentage seems about right.
Necrobestiality is the new fucking your passed-out cousin while tweaking on meth.
Hey, they DID say there would be sex in the air, BELIEVE IT!
“If you’re photographing the moment, you’re not living the moment, you know what I mean, motherfucker?” It’s kinda hard to explain why you just choke-laughed and spit coffee all over your computer to your boss at 8am, but I’ll do my best.
america, america, this is you.
This is what Neil Diamond and Lee Greenwood were singing about.
Also, most of these people seem like the same breed of the average southeastern Texas hick that I am accustomed to spotting around here (especially folks like this guy.) If you replace all their ICP paraphernalia with the Confederate flag and GOD BLESS JOHN WAYNE bumper stickers and Faygo with Lone Star, they are exactly the same. Crackers are crackers and meth is meth wherever you go. I guess that’s sort of comforting, in a sad, twisted way.
Hey! I used to live in Texas and… and… well, yeah these guys are exactly like the white trash people from my town. Ugh.
Yeah, I’m from Texas too and I have a strong feeling that some of the kids I went to high school with would love the Juggalos.
Also, Juggalows + Carnival Swings= SCARIEST SHIT EVER!!
It’s like watching the best Christopher Guest movie ever.
WHEN DID we upgrade FROM MONSTERS to ninjas, GABE? IT FEELS weird to BE CALLED that.
From this moment, you are no longer Turds. You have graduated to Maggots.
HOOORAAAYYY!!!!
The shirt in the last photo makes me think all this business might not be just for laughs.
You know what is for laughs though? Tim Heidecker in Juggaface at 3:21.
Why did I go to the full gallery? So that I could know that the Juggalo Bistro offers a free drink to anyone who shows their dick or tits? Ughhhh. Insane Clown Penis.
dot fart
thank you sen_tankerbell. also the ‘enhance’ bit by funtastik is brilliant
Imagine the KFCs within a 100-mile radius of that thing once everybody headed home.. I bet they couldn’t keep up with all the “bitch-beater” orders.
*sigh* There were magicians and hypnotists all over that bitch.
i wanna go on the swings!
Thanks to Derek Erdman for the coverage and pictures Brooklyn Vegan was to scared (scurred?) to give me. I guess BV is a neden hole.
maybe they hide it really well but i have never met any people in real life like this
As a gay man with a college degree who lives in an urban metropolis, I gotta say: this pretty much approximates my personal vision of hell.
good the fam doesn’t accept bitch asses
Ummmmmmm…
Enhance.
Enhance.
Ah. Yes. It is your girlfriend.
Goddamn it. Enhance fail. I got too excited.
She(?) lives in a gangster’s paradise.
I actually think it’s my boyfriend, but it’s hard to tell.
Are we sure it’s female?
Oh, not at all. My verdict depends entirely on a suspicious lack of body hair and a puckering crotch hole.
Look less like a crotch and more like an ass.
It’s a neden hole. Get it right, my ninja.
I thought the best part about your comment was your computer’s intuition that the only possible way to “enhance” these two was to zoom back out! I Lots of Loved at it for about 2 minutes straight!
I can’t wait to view the full gallery in all it’s hideous glory!
I see these pictures, and I want to mock these people… but all I can think to say is that life really is a lot of pain.
If only I had a dead animal to fuck to lift my spirits…
I bet the “Necro-beasitality for fun and profit” seminar had a wait list.
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You’re right my ninja. My bad. Let’s go out and get some neden; there’s sex in the air. (Am I doing it right?)
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“Sometimes it takes a second chance to realize the ones that never fit in are the ones who really stand out.” -Juggalos
Uh oh guys, looks like Passerby registered.
Well I’ll go to college and learn some big words/ And I’ll talk real loud/ Goddamn right I’ll be heard/You’ll remember the guy who said all those big words he must’ve learned in college.
Ugh. Why would you people vote this down? “Recognize the trueness” is the best phrase in this thread.
I prefer “Untie my spinal chord of reckoning.”
Looks like someone’s being drinking the
Kool AidFaygo.*been
Gabe, can we have a “delete comment” button now? Please?
Of all the things I don’t understand about this (clown paint, hatchets, ninjas, dead animal rape, the word juggalo, etc.), I would have to say that the devotion to Faygo is the most baffling.
The Faygo thing is actually the only part I get – there’s so many flavors of Faygo, and many of them are at least kinda tasty.
if you dont get it must be a rich bitch
Sweet Jesus.
I do like that one guy’s story about the Christlike juggalo who brought him a pair of shoes.
Sorry about everything I said previously. Good call on staying home, Gabe.
Gabe’s chance of survival if he went to the gathering dressed how he normally does would be inconceivably slim.
I think the girl in the frayed dress (shirt?) would have been into the mesh shirt/leather pants
I think I’m most surprised by the fact that there are people of color in these photos. I thought only white people were Juggalos. Thanks, post-racial America!
The fat one on the swing (the less fat one, in red) is apparently six months pregnant. She’s planning on buying all kind of “hatchet gear” for her baby, but I guess she is not planning to stop smoking while it is in her womb.
WHY IS SHE SMOKING!? Dies she think she’s living in the 1960′s where she could get away with this shit. Donald Draper does not approve.
Whoops, I meant to write “does”, but since we are talking about cigarettes and stuff, I guess “dies” is more appropriate…
Oh man you guys missed out, I’m still so hungover and shit, must’ve fucked about 10 dead dogs while on meth woo woo!
The one in the black t-shirt is HOT.
There was this girl in highschool who always had her yuck-green hair in sad, limp braids, was way into Fight Club, and who would often make the juniors locker room her personal stupid mosh pit atfree period. But she would always share her bag of chips with anyone! Forever with them cool ranch doritos for you!
Most of the girls from the photo link remind me of her, so I can’t help but have weird sentimental fun-time memories in seeing them. Say what you want about them juggabums, but I am certain they would share their snacks with you!
(Although, yes, I’d totally be terrified to set foot near the Gathering)
I know what you mean. I had a friend in high school who we’ll just call “disadvantaged.” He would probably fit in pretty well at the gathering (although I’m pretty sure he didn’t screw dead animals) but he was one of the best guys I’ve ever known. Sometimes it doesn’t matter how smart or nice you are, your acorn just didn’t fall far enough from the white trash tree.
My fiance and I just bought a white trash tree. Planted it next to the Japanese maple.
I somehow neglected to mention this during all the other discussions of Juggaculture (My favorite Pixies song!) but my sister had a friend who was a juggalo.
This friend was also a heroin addict who lost her job for shoplifting. WHOOP WHOOP MAH NINJAZZ
So what, you have to just get in the car that sells necro-bestiality to buy it? I feel like even for people into necro-bestiality, getting into a necro-bestio-mobile parked in the forest is like the king of bad ideas.
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Read closer, Chris, it was a rape concert.
i hope they open a string of juggalette’s bistros. the food scene in los angeles is getting so tiresome.
Ah, so muscle tone and grooming your homeless man beard are OUT this year? Nice to see that clam diggers and braids are still hawt.
Sigh. I can completely see my roommate attending/enjoying this.
Really, Pregnant smoking on camera, really? I know, I know, no judgments, Juggalettes! But maybe there should be some judgment.
“It’s a Newport, but YOU CAN HAVE IT”
going to the original site has changed my mind on supporting public health care. I’m now against it.
especially since half the people I was with at the time believed it until I explained the situation to them.
i guess you think your kids deserve better than ours you snotty bitch people like you are the reason Juggalos exist to shine a light on your “im better than you” additude fuck off
I clicked on the full gallery and scrolled down, feeling like I’m following Dante into the depths. The listlessness in the everyone’s eyes and the subtly blatant misogyny began to weigh my heart down. But then I found hope. There was actually a jugglette there… with a book. All is not lost.
Juggalette with a college degree here you judgemental ignorant ass
Ok. Outcasts. ALL OF YOU.
Wait. People listen to ICP?
You don’t “listen” to ICP, you experience it.
I actually encountered these people this weekend. I was visiting friends in Louisville and on the way back to Ohio we unwittingly stumbled upon a caravan of them at a gas station. They all wore T-shirts with some version of the word “fuck” on it including “I am going to fuck your corpse” and, my favorite, the good old gold standard, simply, “Fuck you.”
I actually heard one say to another who was being loud “be quiet, it’s not like we’re at the Gathering anymore.” I was suprised at their mostly quiet reservation as I had been told that my corpse would be fucked. Though, I am beginning to suspect that they are all T-shirt and no action.
why dont you die and find out
Did the guy at 6:23 say he wants to go home without “catching the fucking HIV *again*”?
‘Cause that’s how it works.
I would ask for you to caption some of these pictures, but then I realized “whoops, that’s your life” works for them all.
So, never mind.
Leave your rape whistles at home because at the Gathering, that sound is known as a “mating call.”
I’ll just say that Videogum is on a roll today, every post so far has been golden.
disclosure: I’ll admit that I’ve been to an ICP concert. It was ’97 in CLT, NC back when curious preppy teens wanted to check it out. No joke. I was playing waldo with these pictures to look for the lone polo, but I don’t think anyone is curious anymore…. just really, really afraid.
are we sure that these aren’t actually pictures taken at those raucous town hall meetings on health care that are springing up everywhere around america? because the attendees look oddly similar.
As you monsters enjoy this orgy of smug classist self satisfaction, keep in mind this is exactly how Gwyneth P sees all of you.
I just count my blessings, that I’m at least on her radar and not Violent J’s.
Makes me wonder who the juggalos point at when they make a “that’s your rape victim!” joke.
This movie doesn’t fit the rules of “THFTWMOAT,” but I think it should be a bandit in the race to the worst.
Oh my god, I was working at a video store when this came out. We had a flood of reservations for the thing, and each one was painful to fill out while trying not to laugh. That Tuesday was like a crash-course in hilarious failure.
I was totally shocked to see that there was a trailer for “showers” in the linked pics because this looks like the dirtiest group of people gathered in one place at one time ever. Ever.
wouldn’t judge lion cum licker
I can’t believe I spent all my paycheck on a Burning Man ticket instead of this.
Heavy Metal Parking Lot (or Neil Diamond Parking Lot) that ain’t.
I glad to see at least they’re into safe sex, rather than “catching fucking AIDS.”
I knew it was going to be good at :51, when that girl took the pitcher of beer.
My favorite part is that one guy scatting (or whatever the fuck that guy is doing, it sounds like a terrible version of crimping) about chopping you up into “mice food” and then they cut to a lady going on about all the peace and love in the air. Totally.
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But death panels!
And a soda tax! Faygo is soda!
Ew, you mean tax payer money will go to people who NEED it?!
I’m all for helping people — unless they’re poor and gross.
It’s hard to say this without being too Seriousgum or maybe even Condescendinggum, but it’s not abnormal to act out when you feel victimized. And I’m not for sure — but I’m guessing a lot of these ninjas don’t have the best education/nutrition/opportunities available.
So it’s one thing to poke fun at the hypermasculine posturing and dead animal boinging (bad!), but we probably should keep in mind that they’re, like, people and stuff with, you know, like, inherent worth (good?).
Yeah, I was just about to say: It’s one thing to make fun of people wearing clown t-shirts and it’s another to literally want them to die.
If anyone needs healthcare, it’s these people. How else are we going to prevent the rapid spread of STDs in this country?
so you know how much i make a year probably morethan you i hope you get old social security goes broke and you need public assistance hope you dont get it either and you end up dead on the streets the world is a better place because of Juggalos and worse because of people like you.
…And Jesus wept
She wouldn’t stop showing her titties so they called out the riot squad?!! What has happened to America??
To all the neck-breaking juggalettes….woot-woot
“I’ll chop you up into mice food”
next line
“The love and peace in the air”
Yeah, the dude who edited this did a real great job.
it was tough but i finally managed to pick my new user icon.
It really sounds like the first flavor that guy says at 0:50 is “rape.” “It is a beverage that is refreshing and comes in all sorts of delicious flavors: rape, orange, red pop, moon mist, arson, cola.”
I look forward to being dead when these Jug-of-Goos reach any position of infuence in this country.
Did anyone else find this genuinely unsettling? If I wanted to feel this bad about the world, I would watch the news. Or maybe Bravo.
Question: If you try to gain admittance to The Gathering, and you are the slightest bit attractive, exactly HOW do they go about turning you away?
Bonus Question: Approximately how many years until everyone in these photos starts their next pastime: Furrowing their brow and nodding vigorously while listening to Sean Hannitty talk?
One shower trailer for all those people? Talk about overplanning…
Big trend at the Gathering for ladies this year:
FRONTBUTTS
in my neck of the woods we call that a ‘gunt.’
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More like “whoops whoops”.
“What’s the best thing for a juggalo to drink?”
“Faygo off a juggalettes tits”
hahahaha
Best summer ever! KIT!
i used to love this stuff. then i moved out of my parents house and didn’t need to annoy the piss out of them anymore. although these people are the worst, i still have a soft spot the whole thing.
also the animal rape is new
also gabe would have been fine if he went and this post would be like 5 miles long
dedicated to the butterfly poncho
If they are all ate the Juggalos Gathering then who’s manning the crystal meth labs?
That’s a funny typo, since that’s how a lot of them would say it. “Wur ya bee-yen at?” “Ate thuh Juggalos Gaytherin.”
JuggalOH-NO!
holy hot butter rum batman. dont tell me ppl look like this in real life. and people have the nerve to rip on HIPPIES. makes me feel great about life.
Well that didn’t work. I guess this is what happens when you fail HTML Tags 1001 at your community college.
i dont know gabe, i cant even really make fun of these people. this feels more like ‘We Should All Be So Lucky As To Find Something In This World That Makes Us Happy PART JUGGALOS 4 LYFE.
i mean, isnt this just somebody else’s TEXAS FOREVER?
I like this. I like that all the Juggalos were in one place. I don’t like that they’ve redistributed themselves across the country once again.
I want to know where they are at all times, okay? Because I want my future children to avoid them. I want my Scottish brother-in-law to avoid them. I want my extremely shy cat to avoid them. Most of all I want to avoid them.
It would be easier if they all stayed in Illinois or where ever they are.
were everywhere go hide bitch
fuck you ignorant bitches.you talk shit about other people when you dont even know them.if you want to talk shit about a certain juggalo fine.but you dont know all of us so shut your fuckin mouth.im from texas and im not a god damn red neck or white trash or a fuckin dope head so fuck you.take a look in the mirror at your own white trash ignorant ass before you open your mouth