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Fair is fair. From WENN:

Oprah Winfrey is facing a staggering $1 trillion legal battle over allegations she passed another author’s work off as her own.

The TV titan, one of America’s highest earning celebrities, is being sued by author Damon Lloyd Goffe who accuses the media mogul and her production company Harpo Inc. of plagiarising his book A Tome of Poetry in her internet published work Pieces of my Soul.

And in a copyright infringement suit filed at the District of Columbia Court on 31 July, Goffe insists Winfrey even admitted she used his original works in 2008, reports the National Enquirer.

In the documents, he writes, “In April 2008 Oprah confessed to seizing original works of authorship”.

Goffe and his legal team are seeking the huge amount in damages, claiming that as Winfrey sold an alleged 650 million copies of the book online for $20 (£13) a time, he is owed $1.2 trillion.

Haha. OK! We’re talking about on-line poetry here, right? I just wanted to make sure that this lawsuit made complete sense and seemed sane and appropriate. “Your honor, I demand that Ms. Winfrey pay me this sum with a 1.2 trillion dollar bill. I will put it in my wallet, as is my right, as a coconut.” Total goofball. He should sue the hospital for some medicine.

After the jump, official court transcripts.

INT. COURTROOM – DAY

The JUDGE sits at his bench. Damon Lloyd Goffe rises at his prosecution table thing.

DAMON LLOYD GOFFE
Your honor, I am demanding $1.2 trillion from Oprah Winfrey in restitution for illegal stealing of my poetry for her on-line poetry, justice must be served, objection.

JUDGE
Get out of my courtroom. Just you get out of here.

Sustained.

Comments (37)
  1. The red flag is always “reports the National Enquirer.” Doesn’t the mean TMZ passed on the story? I know John Edwards…, but that was like 1 in a trillion.

  2. “He should sue the hospital for some medicine.”
    Gabe, I think you just figured out how to fix healthcare.

  3. Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and I, I took the one with the 1.2 trillion dollars. Because poetry is for ballers. Also, shot callers.

  4. Someone better call Bob Loblaw

  5. The very best thing is that his book is called A Tome of Poetry.

    • Right, because when he wins the case (because he will win the case), he’ll write the follow-up, “A Diamond Encrusted Hover-Yacht of Strippers and Poetry”

  6. i assume he has a team of highly trained juggalos as his defense.

  7. so the “C” in C.R.E.A.M stands for coconuts…I always wondered.

  8. I smell bailout.

  9. What is clear is that she stole her title from generations of high school sophomores.

  10. Civil Procedure: Ho would a DC federal court even have personal jurisdiction over Oprah. As Ms. Winfrey’s attorney I would file a 12b (b) motion immiediately and ,technically speaking, have this bullshit thrown out.

  11. Civil Procedure: How would a DC federal court even have personal jurisdiction over Oprah. As Ms. Winfrey’s attorney I would file a 12b (b) motion immiediately and ,technically speaking, have this bullshit thrown out.

  12. Duncan  |   Posted on Aug 6th, 2009

    I dont know what makes me sicker: This guy suing Oprah for 1.2 trillion dollars or the fact that her book was bought by 650 million people. Maybe they both make me equally sick. And since I found out about both of them from this website, maybe you make me sick, Gabe!

  13. Alleged 650 million copies”. Yeah because that doesn’t sound made up.

    I’ve just searched google and I can’t find anything about this “internet published” book that isn’t related to this ridiculous case. I decided to go onto her site to look for it. It’s like Goop but for people who like Oprah…. Actually I guess there probably aren’t that many people who visit goop who don’t like Oprah. Anyway, I can’t find anything about this book there but what I did find disturbed and baffled me more than this “let’s make up random amounts of money and try and sue Oprah” nonsense. On Oprah’s website, one can buy transcripts of her shows for $15.95 delivered or $12.95 for a pdf download. Transcripts and not videos. The website seems to emphasise this. There are four years of archives to purchase there. My question is this: WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE WHO WOULD EVEN CONSIDER PURCHASING THIS????

  14. fearlessweaver  |   Posted on Aug 6th, 2009

    Don’t laugh. I just sold my livejournal from 2002 for 700 bajillion.

  15. I think that dude should double check his math.

  16. I’m suing Damon Lloyd Goffe for stealing my idea of suing Oprah.

  17. What d u expect? Look at your source. WENN isn’t exactly known for their integrity.

  18. brenda  |   Posted on Aug 7th, 2009

    I am personally glad, I can’t stand all mighty Oprah. I hope the guy wins and takes it all from her, she deserves it the stuck up I’m the king of the world Oprah.

  19. sherrian  |   Posted on Aug 8th, 2009

    Brenda, and others, your red eyed monster is glaring. Take your issues out on someone who really did something to you. Not Oprah who has worked all of her life and been rewarded for it. You know the American way. Get smart like Oprah, let your money just keep turning over.

  20. yahh  |   Posted on Aug 9th, 2009

    why is he asking for a trillion exactly? because she’s oprah?

    because if those numbers are right, 1 trillion is not what he is owed just for profits. It’s 13 billion… i understand damages but shiiiiiiit somebody explain this to me pls

  21. One Ancient Greek wise man has told: “All that is told and written by us today, has been told and written many centuries prior to us”! Identical: the book and a film does not happen, as always differ paints, a place, a plot and so on… At the big desire, any process can be won, and it is not necessary to spend such big money for the proof of the innocence. I wish good luck.

  22. Baccarat  |   Posted on Aug 18th, 2009

    More likely look a season novelty in August, 2009. Work on the Internet for fifteen minutes! Money to receive for four hours cash, in any country of the world….. I have already earned five salaries.
    http://smartresponder.ru/? baccarat1973

  23. Baccarat973  |   Posted on Aug 18th, 2009

    More likely look a season novelty in August, 2009. Work on the Internet for fifteen minutes! Money to receive for four hours cash, in any country of the world….. I have already earned five salaries.

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