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Trevor: Hey, let’s do a death metal cover of The Postal Service’s “Such Great Heights.”

(Brian puts down suit of armor he was polishing.)

Brian: Dude, that is a great idea.

Trevor: Thanks.

Brian: I feel like “Such Great Heights” will really channel the demonic rage we have towards the corrupt patriarchal system, and that to scream this song will call upon the devil himself to rain an era of fire down upon the wicked.

(Trevor stops eating his BK BIg Fish for a second.)

Trevor: I know, right?

Man, all of the movie trailers and Nissan commercials are about to get so intense. And awful. (Via TheDailySwarm.)

Comments (140)
  1. What the hell is up with mixing screamo vocals with horribly-processed pop vocals? Is this a thing now? Between this and brokencyde I feel almost as old as Gabe (nobody is as old as Gabe).

    • I am WITH you on this x1000.

      Music has really come LEAPS AND BOUNDS since THE BEATLES, huh?

      (KIDDING, I know there’s good music BUT WHY IS THIS what the kiddos LIKE?!?!)

    • jon  |   Posted on Jul 14th, 2009 -30

      Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

    • Biscuits  |   Posted on Jul 21st, 2009 0

      Yeah tell me about it. I’ve seen some screamo bands play at local shows where other bands (that are not just the worst) were playing, and it seems to be part of the rigid structure of a screamo song. Soft intro > Loud Scream-o awful verse > Slower chorus where someone sings in processed pop voice > back to verse > awful lighting fast “solo” > awful chorus again > end > wipe the blood from your ears > die painfully.

      I also love how Gabe has made the phrase “that’s a thing?” a thing. It’s great.

  2. Why you do dis? :(

  3. When I am missing you to DEAAAATH. H-core.

  4. “it may seem like a stretch…” no kidding. eesh.

    • srsly. i can’t believe the kept doing the song after the first chorus. it was like michael bluth watching rita go back into the bowl of fake fruit for the grapes. at first, i thought maybe the song was a cute little guilty pleasure of sorts. i’m laughing with them. but, no. going back for verse 2 made me see them for who they are.

      • jhubin  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +4

        thank you so much for the obscure but appropriate arrested development reference, it said everything I could ever say. made my night.

  5. Nathan Explosion would eat these guys for breakfast.

  6. This is why we’re never going to get another Postal Service album.
    (I really feel this should be a Stereogum comment)

  7. this is going on all of ma mixtapez

    • why would you EVEN JOKE about DOING that to yourself?

      Or is this what you kids PLAY to get the mood JUST RIGHT?

      “Hey baby, YOU LOOKIN fine tonight GURL. Yeah? WHAT’S THAT? You wanna hear a LITTLE JAMZ? Well, it’s a good thing I have this MIX TAPE all ready for tonight baby. MMMM. Listen TO DAT. HEAR THAT intro? Remember how much you LIKED the Postal Service after that ZACH BRAFF shitpile Garden State? Guess what BABY?! NOW THIS song can fit your older, MORE mature tastes. MMM gurl you so fine IJUSTWANTTOBELLOWLIKESAAAAAATANILOVEYOU.”

      That is YOU. On a FRIDAY NIGHT.
      “How Constantinople GOT HIS GROOVE BACK. with help from CONFIDE” The Film. Now playing, in HELL.

  8. He needs to buy stock in throat lozenges. He will need them.

  9. Boooruns  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +106

    This is not death metal. This is not even metal. This is just death.

  10. Say what you will, it takes a lot of talent to stomp in unison.

  11. They’re Christian, so… I guess God’ll be reigning down the era of fire.
    Also, the bassist looks like a weird elf.

    • Why are ALL METAL MUSICIANS christians now?

      I mean, DON’T GET ME WRONG. I love GOD. But let’s be honest: you cannot be a cool musician, LET ALONE A FUCKIN METAL ONE, if you are not getting THROWN (as they say) and basically doing everything against GOD’S WORD until you’re like 50 and you RECORD that acoustic album that everyone says is SO INTROSPECTIVE.

      Essentially, what I’m saying is, real metalheads would kick these guys HEADS into the FLOOR.

    • Are they seriously? Christian?
      Oh god I bet they go to that Mars Hill church in Seattle, where the pastor uses cusses.

  12. scene kid  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +17

    Gabe, not to get all professor genre over here (of course this means i’m going to get all professor genre) but I think because you’re so old, and you don’t know what the kids are up to these days (I’ll give you an out) your parody falls apart because these guys aren’t going for the death thing. We’re talking high-school screamo-pop. If there’s one positive thing we can say about this terrible movement of music, (and it is very terrible) it’s that they don’t seem to take themselves nearly as seriously as the ozzfest crowd. They’ll probably cite some reasonable, influential and relatively important 90′s hardcore bands as influences (and proceed to take take a piss on said band’s legacy by being terrible)… but there’s a pretty great tradition of posi-hardcore covers of pop songs that are actually a blast. The problem here is, this isn’t a pop song so it’s not ironic, and also its very very terrible. KTHXBYE!

    • I bought your argument up until I saw the name SCENE KID.

      • scene kid (irony maybe?)  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +10

        Oh… sorry. Wait… what’s your username?

        • Oh COME ON DIAPERFACE. When I woke up today, I promised MYSELF I would not argue with any SCENE KIDZ.

          I am AN AMERICAN PATRIOT because I believe in my COUNTRY and I LOVE HER. AND I’M NOT ASHAMED TO LET THE INTERWEBZ KNOW. And when you ARE AS OLD as I am AND HAVE KIDS you will understand, MA BOY. Also, your name is IRONY? Congrats? It’s still ridiculous, but I’M SORRY YOU GOT UPSET OVER A WEBCOMMENT AND HAD TO RETALIATE but hey it’s cool it HAPPENS MAN.

          I’m sorry, I have no idea WHAT I’m writing because I don’t know what CONDESCENDING POINT you were trying to make. But cool? High five? We should totally high five.

    • you said posi-hardcore and that makes you suck so much.

  13. Evan  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +7

    I think I’d rather give myself several severe and deep cuts and then jump into a pool of vinegar than watch or listen to that again.

  14. welcome to costco, i love you  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +2

    someone needs to update the “cover versions” section of the wikipedia page for “such great heights” – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Such_Great_Heights

    • I checked that LINK and it has already been DONE.

      LOL (as y’all say)

      • welcome to costco, i love you  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +2

        did i miss that? or did you update wikipedia?

        either way, why does this song have so many covers? it only came out 6 years ago.

        • I did not UPDATE IT, but I went there to see HOW MANY covers it had and it was on there. So someone on VIDEOGUM must have! And, uh, the kids really like this song so maybe BANDS think covering a popular electrotweepop song = fame? I DUNNO. I’M NOT MISTER AMERICAN PATRIOT, THE RECORD EXECUTIVE.

          Though I wouldn’t mind a country version. “But everything looks different when you’re drunk on BUD/ come down now! But we’ll stay.”

  15. Yes, the 2010 Nissan Deathgrinder has its anthem!

  16. These guys really get art. It’s like taking a pop song and making it more meaningful by pretending to scream. It’s a song about love but if you scream it will make you sad and think about your relationships in middle school or high school. And those blank looks that they give to the camera are symbols for their seriousness in art. It makes it 10x more meaningful. Your little sister is going to love this. She’s going to think they are hawt and progressive in art.

  17. That drummer is totally wearing his sister’s black sweater. She is gonna be so upset when she finds out he stretched it out!

    • Oh, and the guitarist is totally wearing his mom’s ballet slippers! Now his mom’s feet will be cold when she’s walking around the house! This guys are just too hardcore!

  18. finding videos like this is literally one of my favorite things to do. please please please go here http://www.myspace.com/attackattack and watch the video. you will NOT be disappointed if you can make it to the bridge of the song

    • HAHAHAHA WTF where on earth did that DANCE PARTY come from? I’m not even sure that was a song. There was absolutely NO sensible structure to it! It was just them playing whatever they wanted whenever it came up!

  19. scrEaMO music is so absurd. they try and seem super hardcore with the screaming, but then pair it with the least masculine singing conceivable sung by someone with feathered girl hair, girl jeans, and a lip ring. Most unnecessary cover of all time goes to brokencyde, who not coincidentally win for worst band name chosen for the fact that it “sounds cool” but has no significance or meaning except a later contrived super deep meaning (like each of us has a side that is broken, but b/c this side is broken we have to spell side C-Y-D-E). Ugh.

  20. Yup, that’s not metal. A-t a-l-l. That, my friends, is scream-o. Well, the scream-o kids hate it when you call them scream-o, they prefer “hardcore.” Because long, straight, shiny hair and skinny black jeans are very hardcore.

    Chest phrase tattoos are also a give-away. Now, if they’d had some bumflaps, or dreads, it might have been grindcore, but unfortunately they are all v-neck tee’d out.

    See, they hoot and holler, hence the scream, and then get all sensitive and sing, hence the emo.

    I…succintly put, hate that shit.

    “all of the movie trailers and Nissan commercials are about to get so intense.”

    Ha!

  21. Remember that old video of two pibulls humping, and at the end one of em throws up and proceeds to lick up vomit?

    Well this video reminded me of that. Wretched, but undeniably hilarious.

  22. this is, without exaggeration, the most dreadful thing i’ve ever heard.

  23. If this is a joke, it’s the best joke/smartest viral publicity stunt 2009 has seen!

    If not, this is the worst Finch meets Atreyu mash-up the world has ever seen. Notice it’s the drummer who does the melodic singing.

    I love how at the beginning of the video they all look like Abercrombie & Fitch model rejects, with their perfectly polished, ironed flat hair, skinny jeans and combination of graphic and plain Ts. Screamo is sooooo 2001. Unless you are doing a lot of synths or lo-fi garage music you are not happening kids!

  24. They all have long hair to better hide their faces in shame.

  25. I’d like to add that these are clearly upper middle class suburban kids that have nothing to “scream” about, except not enough money in the allowance and/or not getting the hottest car or the latest edition of the iPhone every single year.

  26. Couple of things: I like how the drummer/singer is clearly not even attempting to recreate his actual playing (or the obviously sampled drummachine pattern) but rather punching the snare drum with his fists.

    I also found it hilarious how during the breakdown section they are all totally “dropping their assez to the floor” Lil-Jon-style.

    And they way the screamer pronounces the following words, because I’m positive they’ve never been screamed in a screamo song before:
    freckles
    speculate
    puzzles
    persistent
    “with the window down”

    plus, you know, what you all said already: how much it sucks.

  27. it’s nice to see a group of sisters working together.

  28. I’m a really big fan of the way that the Brokencyde post tag is the becoming a catchall tag for terrible music of all kinds. I think Gabe, like the rest of us, instinctively recognizes Brokencyde as perhaps the defining example of everything that is wrong with modern music, as well as the first REAL generational gap that we’ve experienced in music. Which does not bode well for the future. Yikes.

  29. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  30. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

    • I really bought your ARGUMENT the third time around. Is there a NEWSLETTER I can sign up for or perhaps a t-shirt I can wear to show my SUPPORT, my GOOD MAN?

    • Okay, that’s the last time I try to post from my phone. A triple repost?!Is that seriously how it is, my phone’s web browser?! Apologies all. I rated myself negatively.

  31. Their feet must really stink.
    Also what’s Brokencyde? (Or am I better off not knowing?)

  32. Suburban white people are seriously the WORST

  33. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

    • ben  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +7

      GIVE UP.

    • Yes and no: No, it is not better than the Iron & Wine version (but I think you were joking maybe?) but hell yes the Iron & Wine cover is a snoozefest. Glad someone is with me on that (but I still think you were joking? I’m not).

  34. I also give this 4 talking meat swings out of 5 talking meat swings.

  35. Boz  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +4

    I was able to get through about 30 seconds of it. Also, wasn’t this song heavily featured on the noise factory that was Transformers 2: Revenge of the Noisy.

  36. I can’t get over how they’re all 12. And also that this was the worst thing that’s ever happened to my ears.

  37. Emo screamo at it’s worst.

  38. bluewalrus  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 -1

    omg… is this a joke?

  39. the girls walk backwards! i seen it all!

  40. God daamn my phone’s browser pulling the triple submit. God damn it straight to hell. Apologies all.

  41. Seymour Butts  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +5

    Remember Leonard Cohen’s recent Twitter about ihow there should be a moratorium on using “Hallelujah” in movies & Tv shows? Ben Gibbard really needs to do the same thing with “Such Great Heights”. This has gone way too far.

  42. Seymour Butts  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 -6

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  43. Seymour Butts  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 -7

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  44. Those boys are so skinny.
    I’m having fantasies I do not want to have right now. About curb stomping their femurs.

  45. zik  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +4

    It’s a testament to the original song that I found myself listening to it all the way through just on the strength of that doodoodoodoodoodoo.

  46. jayfarer  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 -1

    I love the awkward shots of them singing/screeching into the camera in front of the flickering neon light show. Yeah, hope around and point. That will make you look less like a douchebag.

  47. Zachra  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +2

    I didn’t know kids were taking their fashion/hair/interior decorating cues from the cover of the most recent Maroon 5 album.

  48. Jono  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 -10

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  49. I can’t wait for Brokencyde’s cover of “New Slang”.

  50. mcfan  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +3

    it is cool that they have the same stylist as the jonas brothers though. definite metal cred points.
    heres hoping they team up for a tour sometime soon.

  51. FINALLY! An musical outlet I can use to relieve both the wimpy emo kid and the screaming metal head that live inside of me. Screamo! And without even a hint of irony! Thank you, Videogum, for introducing me to such a special band. Today is a great day.

  52. Jennifer Love Hewitt’s tits devour her face.

  53. Craic Whore  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +1

    The drummer guy was in Hanson no?

    • I don’t know if it’s the drummer but one of those dudes looks like one of the kids from that German tween pop band fronted by androgynous Sonic the Hedgehog.

      • I’ve never actually heard any of that band’s music, but I thought that the girl in the band pretty cute for the longest time until I found out that she was named Bill. And wasn’t a she.

  54. This totally blows away the Iron & Wine Cover. Fo sho.

  55. ohgodno  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +1

    I feel awful now. Fuhk,

  56. This is the first time someone on YouTube has ever out-commented Videogum, and even though it’s super obvious, user ferricide deserves some credit for “GIVE UP.”

    Unless someone here already said it, in which case please be gentle, it’s been a long day.

  57. really?  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 0

    so this is what these guys think death metal is?

  58. K La  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +3

    This brought tears to my eyes.
    And not in a good way. :(

  59. Sean  |   Posted on Jul 13th, 2009 +22

    “Don’t worry MJ. We GOT this.”

    -Confide

  60. why do we need so many remakes of this song anyway? i think if something’s been covered successfully in the last 5 years, we could maybe…i don’t know, cover something else.

    these guys totally win the over-kill award, though. nicely done.

  61. so, on the bright side, the video only has 1 3/4 stars… (trying to be a tiny bit optimistic.)

  62. Respect these guys deserve < 0. I’m also mad for having to use math to express how I feel.

  63. now fuck me how good is that go hard boys
    Dave AKA wola sydney Australia

  64. conrad  |   Posted on Jul 14th, 2009 0

    christian rock has come a long way.

  65. The goofy smiles and the blatent rip off of the opening synths mixed with the cookie monster vocals? Nothing special. They should’ve CONFIDEd with their label and not their younger sisters when brainstorming this one!

  66. Napoleon Complex  |   Posted on Jul 14th, 2009 +4

    As a member of the generation that has spawned Brokencyde, Confide, and screamo in general, it feels incumbent upon me to apologize for this abomination and explain that not ALL of us have this terrible taste in music.

    Not all 15 year olds listen to this. In fact, a lot [like your's truly] find that it makes their ears bleed. I’m more of a Grunge gal.

    However, some 15 year olds DO like it, for no reasons I can fathom. My best friend is an emo and she likes Brokencyde. I’m still friends with her.
    People need to realize that emo kids shouldn’t be shunned. They should be pitied for their musical tastes, and embraced [carefully, so as not to upset them and cause them to cry in a corner.]

  67. Kate  |   Posted on Jul 14th, 2009 +2

    In my dreams I hold cinder blocks in front of them riiiiight before the head banging begins. (while wearing ear plugs)

  68. This makes no sense. None. This sounds like something that Wayne Brady and (insert random white dude in a bowling shirt here) would have done on “Whose Line is it Anyway?”

    I’m even more amazed they don’t spell their name “Confyde.”

  69. I liked it.

  70. Kevin  |   Posted on Jul 15th, 2009 +10

    Best youtube comment for this video: “I have never seen such angry virgins”

  71. Let’s paint, exercise and cut ourselves.

  72. mollyq  |   Posted on Jul 16th, 2009 +2

    this is terrible. but i think when nickelback covers this song, that’s when we know that all good things will end and the worst will rise up and everything will just be a tidal douchefest.
    but on the cereal tip, gotta have my pops

  73. mollyq  |   Posted on Jul 16th, 2009 -2

    this is terrible. but i think when nickelback covers this song, that’s when we know that all good things will end and the worst will rise up and everything will just be a tidal douchefest.
    but on the cereal tip, gotta have my pops

  74. Ha–I was just about to post a link to Attack Attack, too. I don’t know which version of the video you posted because my workplace blocks MySpace (sigh), but the one with the farmhouse and the blonde who has her hands over her ears and looks pained for a goodly portion of the video is far superior to the remake (although, holy shit, the glo sticks at the end of the new version are hilarious). Attack Attack has even spawned its own genre: crabcore.

    More (including the old video and a link to the revamped one) here: http://is.gd/1B14P

    These guys are from my hometown, Columbus, Ohio (well, sort of: they’re from the ‘burbs), and apparently dropped out of high school to do this band thing full-time.

    I would write more, but the weeping is making it difficult to type.

  75. thecharlie  |   Posted on Jul 17th, 2009 -1

    those darn litter louts. dumping their crappy music in my e-yard, and we have it on film too.

  76. I didn’t think bands this collectively ugly and awful at music were allowed to be popular.

  77. Shouldn’t they have done a palm-muted electric guitar intro or something instead of just cut-and-pasting from the original? Also, this is some of the best rich-parents production value I’ve seen.

  78. AAAAH. WHAT THE FUCK?

  79. I only made it :57 seconds into this. This isn’t really popular among the kids is it, because fuck. (On the other hand, had Steve Albini produced it, then I’d be all “queue that shit up!”)

  80. TheRookieYear  |   Posted on Sep 14th, 2009 0

    ben gibbard should punch this lame-o in the face. then go eat a vegan burger.

  81. Emo band is watching you puke

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