In an inspired field piece last night about a few people who want Long Island to secede and become its own state, Samantha Bee managed to find what I hope, no, what absolutely have to be the three biggest idiots in the “melting pot” of Long Island. They can’t name a U.S. state even when given three chances, they think the state bird should be “flippin’ the bird,” and, oh yeah, they’re homophobic, just for good measure (“You guys still got The Village. Good luck with that one.”) Presenting, the three stupidest men in the tri-state area. I hope.

(Be sure to watch ’til the 3:00 mark):

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c
Long Island Wants to Secede
Daily Show
Full Episodes
Political Humor Newt Gingrich Unedited Interview

We all know that plenty of smart people are from Long Island, but for every Alec Baldwin there is a Stephen Baldwin.

Comments (33)
  1. “Pow pow pow pow pow” while flexing my biceps will be my go-to lady-killing move from this moment forward.

  2. To the HATERZ who say there are no funny women, I submit to you one Samantha Bee.
    Take that, Science.

  3. Samantha Bee is all A’s in my book.

  4. On second thought, you know what, no.

  5. If you think that’s bad, stay clear of Staten Island.

  6. Arizona State students > Long Island meatheads? Discuss.

  7. They love Ed Hardy shirts, too.

  8. I say, let them secede.

    Then drop 100,000 soldiers in there.

    No survivors.

  9. I like how the “gun show” guy is pretending his bigass sunglasses are bangs. Cardinal Vice Dos & Don’t sin. And the dude in middle has no shoulders. It’s just a head stcking out of a stump, no chin either.

  10. The part of me who worked at a 19th century living history village and consequently spent those years of my life watching every PBS special about anything even tangentially related to the 19th century loves the 3 minute mark. I even remember playing that song on my violin as I sat on the porch of the Paw Paw Post Office on Sunday afternoons. God, those were dark times.

  11. samantha bee, yoose da worst! just like da gabe and lindsay says! da worst! da worst! lololololololololol!!!

  12. Mike  |   Posted on Jun 16th, 2009 +1

    This is precisely why I want to get the fuck off Long Island as soon as possible.

  13. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  14. I live in Seattle :) I really really really love Seattle. :)

  15. kevin  |   Posted on Jun 17th, 2009 -2

    wait…we understand that this was a written and acted interview, right? ha ha, guidos are retarded, duh, but yall are acting like these are actual people.

  16. matt  |   Posted on Jun 17th, 2009 0

    um, they clearly are actual people. i guess you’ve never been on the LIRR.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post, reply to, or rate a comment.