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Some stupid rich person with no life will be spending a lot of money for what will surely be an awkward, brief, unsatisfying lunch for two with Mad Men‘s dreamy Don Draper and avowed “comedy nerd” Jon Hamm, who will absolutely for sure not, during the course of the lunch, realize that he and the stupid rich person have a similar sense of humor as they riff back and forth, quoting from Wet Hot American Summer and having a flirtatious fake “argument” about their favorite Mr. Show sketches (hers will be “The Joke: The Musical” while his is the more masculine “The Audition,” but truly, both will be right), realize that they are kindred spirits and should at the very least be best friends forever.
Nope, that stupid rich person, whoever she or he turns out to be on April 16th when the ebay auction for a charity benefiting female filmmakers comes to its mercenary close, will instead realize immediately that the prize she or he has bought with her or his stupid filthy probably-somehow-connected-to-the-Madoff-scandal money was the realization that Jon Hamm, while polite and warm as can be, would rather be pretty much anywhere else on the planet than having lunch with some desperate pathetic rich fan. He prefers more interesting people. With lives.
(This also applies to the “Lunch with Paul Rudd” auction, which is currently beating Jon Hamm by over $300. Thanks for the tip, Anna!)
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How about we as the Videogum readers/staff pool our money together and have one big group date with the both (Paul and Jon) of them.
Too bad I’m an incredibly poor college student….I can contribute like 50 bucks if I go to the plasma bank later.
If Gabe were to have a lunch auction in support of Christian Nematodes, I definitely wouldn’t sell my home and all of my personal belongings including pets in order to win. I especially wouldn’t put him in my trunk afterwards. So relax, Gabe.
Did you know Lindsay put Gabe’s phone number on eBay once? Fun times!
OMG I forgot about that! Nice 2006-remembering, MM!
Yes! I’ve read about that, but it happened before I was born. Good thing, too, or I’d be living in a cardboard box somewhere [a smaller cardboard box].
I’d probably just call and hang up, anyway. Mystery taught me to do it like that.
Shipping Jon Hamm from California to my house in Brooklyn costs $577.50 via FedEx, so the lunch almost pays for itself.
(Jon Hamm’s weight was estimated at 175 lbs.)
(Also, I did use 90210 as the “California” ZIP code for example purposes.)
I’d be willing to sell my organs, I think.
For Paul Rudd that is.