The cover story of this month’s Rolling Stone is a feature on Gossip Girl. Sure. It’s a great show, and what better time to feature them on the cover of a declining music magazine than three quarters of the way through the television season, during South by Southwest, amidst a world in chaos. IT JUST MAKES SENSE. Whatever. Look at me being all Professor Magazines over here. ANYWAY, in the article, Chace Crawford and Ed Westwick are asked about the persistent rumors that they are two gay guys being gay lovers with each other, which they have consistently denied, and which they deny again in the article, but naturally they deny it in the gayest way possible. From Rolling Stone (via Towleroad):

Says Westwick: “[The rumors are] Fucking ridiculous! “It’s funny because I love this fucking dude dearly. I would die for this fucking dude. He’s my brother. But, by God, we are so into our women it’s ridiculous. But what are you going to do about it? Get pissed off and stay home and cry about it?…I made out with a girl in public. Fuck it, I’ll have sex in public. That one’s still on the list. Still haven’t ticked that one off. Well I have, but they haven’t seen me. Not George Michael public.”

Hahahha. That is so subtle. George Michael reference? Perfect. I’m glad Ed Westwick stopped fucking Chace Crawford long enough to mindfuck me. I mean, I think we’re all on the same page here, which is that we don’t care if Ed Westwick and Chace Crawford give each other blowjobs all night. Go ahead guys! But, like, it’s the ’90s, Ed Westwick. I don’t know how they do it over in Cornwall or whatever, but making out with a woman in public does not help you in America. Look at Ryan Seacrest. And saying “By God, we are so into our women it’s ridiculous” causes gaydars to burst into flames. Methinks the filthy lady doth protest too much.

Chace Crawford or Ed Westwick
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Comments (14)
  1. Ed Westwick is the straightest celebrity I’ve ever met.

  2. Nice photoshop job!

  3. Gossip Girl is a great show??? No, it’s not. It is terrible in every way.

  4. Gossip Girl is amazing. also Ed is gay, but worst, Ed goes on dates with men who wear dress shoes without socks, which actually means they’re both British, not gay. mindfuck!

    Ed on British Bro Date : http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/32938415.html

  5. Abby  |   Posted on Mar 21st, 2009

    I generally try to resist commenting on other posters’ comments, but in the case of the Ed Westwick is he or isn’t he dialogue between sarcasticmeow and I PEE GOLD this time I really can’t hold my tongue as I believe that I possess valuable information that is telling both about Mr. Westwick and perhaps also about sarcasticmeow as well. In specific I’m referring to sarcasticmeow’s (possibly sarcastic??) observation that “Ed Westwick is the strraightest celebrity I’ve ever met” and as well as his follow up, in response to the very logical question posed to him by I PEE GOLD “Did you meet him[Westwick] at a gay bar?-” , to which sarcasticmeow repllies: “.Actually at Fat Cats on Christopher Street. Gay neighborhood, not so much a gay place” …Well, allow me to illuminate. First of all, Fat Cats is indeed in the West Village but it is NOT on Christopher Street but is rather about 5-6 blocks away on West 4th Street & 12th Street; and more to the point, Fat Cats is indeed a gay bar-specifically, it’s a lesbian bar owned by a lesbian who also owns another major lesbian West Village bar (Henrietta’s),. Its status as a lesbian bar is a central feature of all ads for Fat Cats which regularly run in various newspapers both gay and straight around town & Fat Cats was also recently named one of the 50 best gay bars in the world by Out Magazine (national gay publication). While it’s true that Fat Cats does not have a women-only door policy & that at times some in-the-know local heterosexuals of both genders do frequent it, the overwhelming majority of the clientele is 95-98% gay & the only non-gay folks to be found there tend to be local and there with their gay friends (it’s not easy to find & isn’t well marked, thus people don’t tend to just stray in unawares.) How do I know this? I’m a lifelong West Village resident who has been out as a lesbian since age 15 & I daresay that makes me somewhat of an expert on gay & especially lesbian West Village establishments. So what do we make of this info in light of the dialogue about Westwick sexuality & sarcasticmeow’s various pronouncements? Well, perhaps Westwick IS INDEED one of the straightest celebs sarcastic meow has ever met, but I’m not sure who this says more about. Or perhaps sarcasticmeow meant that Westwick is one of the straightest celebs he’s ever met at Fat Cats, which is entirely possible as not many celebs tend to patronize it but as an assertion it doesn’t really add up to all that much. To me, the simple fact that Westwick was at Fat Cats in the first place tends to send my already blaring gaydar on Westwick onto a level of 100+ on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being straighter than Hulk Hogan and 10 being.George Michael and Boy George combined. Or to put it another way, my gaydar on Westwick is as blazing as is Westwick himself. PS. What kind of real straight man over the age of 12 much less a 20-something celebrity heartthrob who professes to be straight feels the need to boast to an interviewer that .”I made out with a girl in public” ???. Bully for him. And Ryan Seacrest is being completely sincere when he insists on inappropriately leering in campy over the top fashion at any female he interacts with between the ages of 2 and 90.

    • Just start a blog.

    • Fenrox  |   Posted on Mar 23rd, 2009

      Abby, clearly you are a 70 year old lady, for the kiddos Fat Cat is the MOST not-gay place evar. EVAR LADY. IT ONLY SERVES BEER! It has shuffleboard for god sakes! I WISH it was as gay as you make it but its like the most normal.

  6. Wow that was way to long for me to read.
    I much rather comment on this picture anyways!


    TRACY MORGAN AND CHUCK BASS!

  7. Fenrox  |   Posted on Mar 23rd, 2009

    ALSO: I just want to say that ED is the bottom in that relationship.

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