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Last week I did my best to explain what makes Brody Jenner’s new reality show, Bromance, so complicated and fascinating. Even on its own, this new trend in reality television in which half-famous pseudo-fames try to find “friendship” is incredible, without Bromance‘s intense homoeroticism, which then makes it double incredible. Like, why is it that finding a friend via a reality show seems so much more hilarious and ridiculous than finding a WIFE? If anything, it’s more plausible that this type of project would have a successful outcome, and yet it is just so hilarious. Maybe it’s because when people go on TV to find a spouse you know that they’re just going to fuck all the contestants and try to capitalize on the 15 minutes. But in this situation there is no secret fucking (I don’t think) or unspoken-but-obvious motivation. And where “I’m just here to find love” is trite and stupid, it’s not as LOLable as “I just really want to find someone to hang out with,” even though both genuine sentiments are equally and totally fair enough.

So, OK, we have established that this show is amazing. But what we haven’t figured out yet is who is this show supposed to be for?

It’s not exactly for fans of The Hills, at least not the core Hills audience. 12-year-old girls are not interested in the complicated and highly-charged ways in which men attempt to prove their platonic worth to each other, nor are they interested in reality shows that are intensely self-aware and whose entertainment value is constructed primarily out of playing upon the socially frought interplay between modern hetero- and homo-sexuality. But if you don’t watch The Hills, then you don’t really know who Brody Jenner is. So is Bromance aiming at the ironic Hills fan? These are the overeducated people who secretly enjoyed the show for a year or two, but didn’t feel comfortable admitting it to their friends until it started getting reviewed in The New Yorker. That seems like a small audience, but this show was obviously so cheap to produce (the house the contestants live in is seriously a piece of shit, and was probably bought for a dollar at some foreclosure auction) that it doesn’t need to pull in a huge audience to be a minor financial success.

Maybe.

Except, something happened on last night’s episode that was insane, and bear in mind that we’ve already seen a hot tub elimination ceremony and Bachelor-style one-on-one firepit confessions. But this takes the gay cake.

Wait, WHAT? We can talk all we want about the supposedly fine line that modern guys have to walk if they want to show that they’re comfortable enough in their sexuality to joke about their feminine traits/impulses without actually crossing that line into genuine homosexual behavior, but all of that talk is useless when you have a scene where two dudes walk in on another dude taking a shower while softcore erotica music plays in the background. What is this? Who wants this? Do gay dudes even want this? What is happening?

I need an adult.

Comments (38)
  1. You’re so right.
    cus…what?

  2. I’m a gay… and… NOT WANT

  3. WWWOOOOWWWW!!! That was akward. That was so set-up. Yep, gay is the new straight.

  4. maybe he wants his keys, earnestly thought talking head no. 1 as he quickly responded to brody’s bark, he returned and put the keys down farthest from brody, hoping to get the more time with his new best bro (fingers crossed), they keys being far away, he got to spend time watching brody berate him through the clear glass of the shower. He wept with the overwhelming emotion of new friendship as he left brody’s sight.

  5. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

    • Chadams  |   Posted on Jan 13th, 2009 +1

      I’m going to agree for the most part and say that MTV is trying to recreate the success from the forced schadenfruede-style shows on VH1like “I Love Money”, et al. But they’re trying to appeal to a younger audience by going grosser (“A Shot of Love”, “Next”) and more blatant in their failed attempts at humor (all of their shows). It’s possible that this show is designed to be a guilty pleasure show for college freshman males a la “The Hills”, not that MTV cares if their demographic research syncs up with their ratings in the first place.

  6. Al  |   Posted on Jan 13th, 2009 +12

    Dude, guys bro down in the shower all the time. Didn’t you take gym in high school? (I didn’t take gym in high school.)

  7. Haven’t you heard?
    This show is moving to online distribution only via seancody.com

  8. Al #2  |   Posted on Jan 13th, 2009 +5

    The serious answer? It’s for lonely women.

  9. D  |   Posted on Jan 13th, 2009 +2

    Hey Gabe, where’s our Tool Academy walkthrough? :)

  10. todders  |   Posted on Jan 13th, 2009 -10

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  11. No mention of the unbelievable elimination ceremony? When Brody and two friends dressed up in sombreros, ponchos, and fake mustaches? And blindfolded the final two and positioned them like a firing squad? Then shot paint pellets at the “loser?” That might have happened after the second clip of Brody showering.

  12. Lizzie  |   Posted on Jan 13th, 2009 +4

    If it was “Sleazy T” in the shower, then the intended audience would be me. I felt gross just typing that, but its the truth.

  13. I like the idea that Brody Jenner has a camera crew follow him in the bathroom regularly, just in case his friends should decide to walk in, but probably mostly so that later he can just watch footage of himself showering. You know, so he can read his tattoo better.

  14. brody jenner probably thought of this scene himself.

    it’s probably targeting post-scenester (post-post-emo) 17 year olds who think gay-for-pay is the hottest thing ever [via my chemical romance and panic at the disco stage gay]

  15. BroJ is setting us up for something, I know it. Something epic that will change Reality Television History.

  16. The bonus benefit of the shower scene was how it conveniently clued us in to the existence of Brody’s “Jenner” tattoo. Which is a sort of visual hand-holding that led us to Femi’s ridiculous idea to get inked.

    Also, can we talk about Femi? He’s terrible and makes everyone uncomfortable in a Kevin sort of way. But something tells me he got a free pass last night because it might actually be interesting to see if a black guy and a white guy can truly bro it up.

  17. i think this show started out as an attempt to reel in the teenaged hills fan girls who would like to know more about boys, especially brody jenner type boys. “what are guys really like?”, “what do guys do when girls aren’t around?” “what do guys talk to each other about?”, etc.
    who knew that they just get naked with each other all day and talk about their needs? why won’t they do that with us? bastards!

  18. I have friends who are uncomfortable with the phrase “That’s Gay” to denote something being lame. I propose we substitute the phrase “That’s Brody Jenner” as a proper homonym.

  19. You know what? You’re right, Gabe. This show is frought. It’s frought.

  20. joe  |   Posted on Jan 13th, 2009 0

    “I have friends who are uncomfortable with the phrase “That’s Gay” to denote something being lame. I propose we substitute the phrase “That’s Brody Jenner” as a proper homonym.”

    THAT’S GENIUS! I’m a gay and I don’t want this show, just a bunch of douche bags, not even hot douche bags.

  21. tough titties turkleton  |   Posted on Jan 13th, 2009 0

    also: is it normal not to have a shower curtain? for your shower to just have a totally clear glass door? if so, my life has been a lie.

  22. Okay…. I’m all for nakedness, but I really think that Brody is sticking his pinky toe out of the proverbial closet to see how people will react. Or what’s worse, he’s throwing all the homo-eroticism in the show to get a rise out of the TV viewing population. DAMN! He wants to OWN his 15 minutes!!!!!

  23. deezey  |   Posted on Jan 14th, 2009 +5

    Gabe, I believe “Executive Producer: Ryan Seacrest” is the answer to your questions!

  24. Morons  |   Posted on Jan 15th, 2009 -1

    its obviously a staged show, come on. are we this naive at this point in the game? im sure that dude was wearing some sort of bathing suit and just had it pixelated out. are people forgetting sensationalism? its the kind of shit that brings even the “holier-than-thou” crowd to the TV screen to see what inane bullshit will happen next week. you have to stop glorifying this idiocy by ignoring it completely. there’s a reason that reality TV is still alive and kickin

  25. Realitybored  |   Posted on Jan 15th, 2009 0

    Man, this is another sad attempt to hype up an already lame premise by blurring the gay/straight divide, no matter what the audience this brainless show tries to attract. As in a previous comment had mention, you’ll find far better examples at seancody.com OR corbinfisher.com

  26. TTY  |   Posted on Jan 15th, 2009 +1

    If you pause it really quick at 11 seconds, you can see he’s wearing little shorts.

  27. LeanzaCornett  |   Posted on Jan 16th, 2009 0

    It very simple. The sexual varience, the table of human sexuality is blaring from solely heterosexual to primarirly heterosexual.

  28. It’s not a show you can take too seriously folks, it’s partially a spoof, get it?! Even so, BrodyJ is gettin’ real. Masculinity ain’t easy sometimes. The Vagina Monologues have nothing on what young men go through in silence. It’s about time we see guys revealing feelings and acknowledge that they need and want close friends. And, the self-absorbed, grow-up-already Ryan Sheckler (Life of Ryan), isn’t the role model they need. For all his hyper-masculine antics Brody has been seen encouraging a potential bro to drink less, trying to get a guy to open up and feel comfortable with himself, and has fun when these guys plan an “activity.” A little on the unusual side, indeed, but the willingness to try it and respect-for-the-effort attitude that Brody reveals is itself worth the watch time. Moreover, the varied backgrounds of the contestants allows a variety of masculinities to be illuminated. That said the shower scene and the candlelit chill sessions are some of the coolest spoofs on TV. Oh, and hey, did you see the episode where the dude Chris threw up in the van. Its been a long damn time since I laughed that hard.

  29. Seconded. Brody Jenner is kinda cute, but he should still be thrown down a flight of stairs.

  30. wow… that was the worse attempt at acting natural that ive ever seen.

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