There’s another new promo for season 5 of Lost, you guys.

OK, we get it, YOU’VE GOT TO GO BACK. So go back. Either go back or shut up. In case anyone’s wondering what that final screen says on the library computer, it’s here. Whatever it even means. That’s my tiny contribution to the nerd archives this show generates with each new piece of information, and I’m sure I’m too late. That screencap was probably posted on two years ago. It’s overwhelming, really. At the opening of this promo you can hear Locke talking backwards, so someone reversed the audio and posted it on-line for everyone to puzzle over. Nice, except that it is gibberish. Whoever made this was like “backwards audio is totes mysterious, don’t hog it, bro.” That’s the thing about trying to unravel the Lost mystery. I’m not saying anything new, I know, but every once in awhile it’s important to remember that we’re not dealing with Nabakovian word puzzles based on musical structures buried in subtextual rhythms. We’re dealing with a particularly unmonitored writers’ room with a mini-fridge full of Red Bull and a wipe board that just says “Smoke Monsters?” and has just said “Smoke Monsters?” since day one.

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Comments (2)
  1. Nice thought, Gabe, but WRONG!

    What we are dealing with is a group of highly intelligent people who have a thorough and detailed understanding of all the knowledge man has attained in the arts and sciences, combined with an ability to intricately weave these concepts in astrophysics, magnetism, cellular biology, meteorology, zoology, etc. together with the themes and stories in all literature, ancient mythology, and pop culture, and integrate them into a seamless narrative where every word, image, and sound has significance and everything always makes perfect sense, which we will be obvious after we watch the final episode. And they were able to do this over a couple of months back in 2004, when they absolutely figured the whole thing out and are now in no way at all making it up as they go along.

    And what’s even more remarkable is that these reservoirs of human experience and insight came together to apply this omniscient view of the world and the universe and existence not toward frivolous goals like curing disease, eliminating poverty, stopping global warming or simply bettering humanity, but to creating a television show that takes place on a magic island and that once featured a character played by Bai Ling.

    It’s kind of beautiful, don’t you think?

  2. That’s not gibberish. Locke clearly says “Ham. I win.” Which means two things:
    1. It’s a game and, of course, Locke wins. The island has always wanted Locke to win, but it had to pretend like the game wasn’t fixed, which it totally was because you don’t see anybody else walking away from their wheelchairs now do you? But the island knows how to maintain the simulacra of fairness, that’s what it’s all about, like, “whoop, you can walk, how about that?” or “whoop, you just got disemboweled by a smoke monster, that’s tough.”


    2. The prize is cured pork.

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