This is a controversial That’s Your Boyfriend, because it can be argued that the fact that this guy is demonstrating a comical male masturbation machine at some sort of ridiculous sex machine convention (Comic Con?) is proof that he doesn’t have a partner, but I like to think that you just let this machine do all the work and take his money, because you’re a gold digger. Not safe for work:

If he invented that machine and it somehow works, I’m sure he’s able to take you out to very nice no-strings-attached dinners. (Via Gorillamask.)