Diddy’s going to be hosting a new show on VH1 called I Want to Work for Diddy. It looks like a cross between The Apprentice and a joke.

This is the single most obtuse preview I’ve ever seen. Sure, it’s got the tears and drama of a great (not great) reality show, and Diddy looks great (not great) as the overbearing boss. Oh, and there’s an ambulance! Suspense! But there isn’t a single hint, not even a whisper of a clue as to what these people will actually be doing, or competing for. Work for Diddy doing what? Wearing night vision goggles and crying? Also, I’m pretty sure you can’t use phrases like “this is what it’s like in the heat of battle” anymore. Those phrases went out of style right around the time the war in Iraq entered its third year. Heat of battle, right. Is that what’s up with his vest? The whole thing reminds me of that Robert Smigel TV Funhouse cartoon where some children try to uncover the mystery of what Puff Daddy actually does. It’s not online. This is online, but that isn’t? FAIL.