Here’s a new preview of The Hills, you guys. It’s got tons of great ideas for your ink. (Gross. Everyone who actually says “ink” like that in real life should get a tattoo of prison bars on their face.)

Here are just a few suggestions for your new lower back tattoo:

• “You Went Down A Really Bad Path”
• “This Is The Part Where We Need To Make An Effort”
• “Where Do We Go From Here?”

I know I’ve said it before, but this show is going downHILLS. What a clown parade. Every morning these people should be forced to make a list, for God, of why they should still be allowed to exist, and if they can’t make it to three reasons, they should restore their family’s pride. NOTE: none of the reasons for existing can be “Doug’s jet.” Poor Heidi’s sister. You can just see her sitting on her parents’ rustic sofa in their Crested Butte log home watching all the episodes and thinking “Aw, I want to have all the flesh sucked out of my face and replaced with some kind of silicon/plastic composite, too.” Yuck. The Montag and Pratt families should just get their own show already. It can be called The Bad, the Bad, and the Ugly, and every episode ends with a Mexican Standoff.