Collider has an interview with Verne Troyer today about The Love Guru (and also his work on The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, in which he co-starred with his best friend, Heath Ledger). They cover all the burning questions:

Collider: Was it fun to have your own office that was your size and watch everybody else adjust to your world for a change?

Verne Troyer: Yeah, exactly. In the average size world I adjust to, you know, I’m used to everything. It was very different for me to get on this stage. It was like a different world that was very comfortable.

Yup. That’s what that scene was about.

Just opening people’s eyes to the realities of dwarfism, and all the slapstick that would occur if we were forced to live in their tiny houses (that don’t exist). Verne Troyer gets mad respect in Mike Myers movies. The scene where he gets hit in the face with a hockey puck and then Mike Myers’s racist-as-holy-fuck Guru character picks him up and starts giving an acceptance speech like he’s at the Academy Awards—because, you see, Verne Troyer’s body is not much bigger than a statuette—wasn’t a cruel joke, but actually about breaking down the stereotypes that dwarves are like Golden Globes. You guys, they’re totally the size of a much more prestigious award.

The whole thing is just depressing. Like, Troyer is gushingly happy that Mike Myers wrote some dialogue for him, as opposed to just casting him as another silent rag doll in silver lamé à la Mini-Me. And somehow Troyer sees this role as a huge step forward from a culture that casts people like him as elves and Leprechauns, which I would understand if his character wasn’t mostly the set-up to punch lines like “I’m sorry, I didn’t get your gnome, I MEAN NAME.” That’s so funny I forgot to KILL MYSELF.

It’s not for me to say that Verne Troyer should be offended by the way Mike Myers portrays him in movies, but it is for me to say that Mike Myers is the worst and he should go to Comedy Jail for crimes against humanity with no chance of parolololol.