The release of Valkyrie, the one where Tom cruise dresses up like a Nazi, has been pushed back until February 2009. But here’s what the trailer for the movie would have looked like if it was coming out this summer?

Ugh, I hate Hitler, you guys. He was always puling people apart like warm bread. If you’ve ever gone to the Holocaust Museum, or listened to a Holocaust survivor tell their tragic story, it’s always a bunch of warm bread metaphors, and it’s just like, Jesus, look what humanity is capable of. Sure, we all dream of a world where people don’t pull each other apart like warm bread, but we can never go back to thinking that it’s impossible. We know, now, that pulling people apart like warm bread is happening all the time. This movie should serve as a wake up call for our conscience, a wake up call that says stop the pulling apart of people like warm bread in Darfur.

I heard that they pushed the movie back until 2009 because they’re going to overlay Tom Cruise’s character with a CGI good actor.

Free Tom Cruise in Valkyrie Wallpaper - Download The Free Tom Cruise ...
Tom Cruise as Col. Claus von Stauffenberg in United Artists' 'Valkyrie ...
Valkyrie Trailer" - Valkyrie Movie - Tom Cruise Valkyrie
Aye aye ... Tom Cruise in Valkyrie
Storytelling: Just don't overthink it
A few years back Tom Cruise got the bright idea to play Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg, a German army officer who attempted to kill Adolf Hitler (he failed). The movie was 2008's "Valkyrie" (it failed, too). At some point during production of ...
Hitler’s Lair to become Poland’s Next Big Tourist Attraction
The camouflaged complex sits in the Masurian woodlands near the town of Ketryn in what was once German East Prussia and is the site of the assassination attempt on Hitler by Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg - popularized by the 2008 Tom Cruise film "Valkyrie."
Comments (5)
  1. I’m so sad that this is Bryan Singer’s work. He used to be better than that.

  2. didn’t know the nazi’s were english…. this isn’t ancient rome, we know what it sounds like when german’s speak english.

  3. No spoilers, but I hope Hitler gets it.

  4. The best part is that the warm bread guy is played by Eddie Izzard, who probably realized what a stupid line that was the second he said it.

  5. As we said in elementary school, that looks gay.

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