topher_grace.jpg

[In this feature, we periodically check in to see what is up with Topher Grace.]

I was listening to a podcast of an old episode of Fresh Air on my Zune the other day (because I listen to podcasts of old episodes of Fresh Air, because I’m 122 years old) and they had a review of a new documentary coming out called No Impact Man. The documentary is based on a book of the same name, which itself was based on a blog by a guy named Colin Beaven. The premise of this social experiment is that for one year, Colin and his family lived their lives sustainably, without taxing the environment in any way. So they used a clay pot instead of a refrigerator, and they made all their birthday presents out of bark, and they turned urine into prison wine, I don’t know. You get the point! Now, to be fair to Colin Beaven, I have not read his blog, or his book, or seen the documentary, so I can’t speak too knowledgeably about the thing I’m about to complain about, but doesn’t it seem like he should change his name to Lots of Impact Man? (My carbon ZINGprint is huge!) Do you know how big of an environmental burden it is to print a book? Not to mention the amount of electricity involved in publishing a blog and creating a movie, which one assumes will later be distributed on DVDs. (Not to mention that the whole thing just seems self-indulgent and attention-cravey; the Supersize Me of the green movement.) I don’t know, something about the whole thing made me so mad.

You know who isn’t polluting the world with his well-meaning but terribly misguided book? Topher Grace. But this isn’t a column about what Topher Grace isn’t up to. It’s about what he is! Let’s see!

This week our man has been blowing up the online blogopolis!

KABLOG!

On Sunday, a young blogger named MegaNachos had this to say:

That’s not very nice, Mr. Hood! At the very least, one might expect some explanation for why you spent up to three minutes making that image on MS Paint.

But Topher Grace knows as well as anyone that this is the price of fame. It’s not all playing air guitar at romantic comedy wrap parties. Living your life in the public eye, as Topher does, kind of, means opening yourself up to all kinds of baseless and unsubstantiated criticism. It’s always been that way. Isn’t that right, Eve?

“Fuck you, and fuck your livejournal!”

Then, just yesterday, a young blogger by the name of The Liberal Reader posed this question to his or her readers:

I’m not sure what that has to do with pandas, or why the only category for the post is “travel,” but I do know that the answer to the post’s question can be found every week, right here!

And, of course, That ’70s Show remains popular in syndication

And there you go. That is what is up with Topher Grace. See you next time!

Comments (49)
  1. There is a Topher Grace on Twitter, but I’m 90 percent certain it’s a fake. :/

    http://twitter.com/tophergrace

    • Haha, either the guy faking topher grace is also faking Emily Blunt, Hayden Christensen and Abbie Cornish’s twitters (what an odd selection) or all these celebrities think the world should know about the most surfers on a wave record and Nikki Awesome’s new music video.

  2. KABLOG! is the noise I like to imagine Gabe shouts every time he posts something new.

  3. I can say that these bloggers don’t speak for everyone, because the people in my church* seem to love him. He is celebrated frequently with soulful renditions of Amazing Grace, which, coincidentally is my favorite song about Top Grace. What’s yours?

    *bar

  4. Also, Top Grace should be a show on Bravo. The end.

  5. Topher Graze

  6. My favourite part of “Hey, What’s Up With Topher Grace” is the “Hey, What’s Gabe Thinking About Recently” then weak segue to Topher Grace related news.

    • Weak? Those segues are a quick glimpse of what a literary master can do when confronted with an extraordinary challenge, in this case “how do I segue from non Topher Grace news into Topher Grace news?”

  7. What is up with Topher Grace this week is that he has been Photoshopically combined with a donkey for the amusement of teenage blogsters.
    Word!

  8. This is my favorite thing on videogum.

  9. Heidi needs to be aware of this on-going feature.

  10. Here’s what’s up with No Impact Man. He seems kind of really punch-in-the-face-able.

  11. Is anyone going to rush to Toph’s defence on this-so-called Mega Nachos blog?

  12. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  13. Most importantly, Topher Grace has been cast, by unanimous decision from everyone ever, to play Clark Gable in the upcoming biopic that’s totally happening. Released December 2012. (Gunshot?)

  14. In reality some people i know call me “Forman” sometimes because i guess my personality is like the character Topher Grace plays on “That ’70s Show,” but I don’t see it as much. I also have red hair. I’m the lovechild of Donna and Eric.
    But real.

  15. Is it bad that the thing that made me laugh the hardest is the name “MegaNachos”?

  16. Leave T-Grace alone!

    I want that tattooed on me somewhere. Also Gabe was that a Let’s Go To Prison ref?

  17. Topher Grace, more like Torpor Grace! Get a job hippie!

  18. Sorry to be such a LITERALIST for a moment, but I think she was saying she was going to DC (hence travel) and they have an awesome free zoo there with pandas (hence the pandas). Sorry to explain it.

    • YOU JUST RUINED ITS MAGIC

      • LOL Sorry. It never had any magic for me because when I hear DC I instantly think PANDAS so I wanted to spread that magiclessness to everyone else. Pandas can still be magical though. VGUM FIELD TRIP TO DC TO SEE PANDAS EVERYONE

        • Yeah, I totally didn’t see that as non-sequitor either, as I lived in DC, and went to see the pandas (well, the Zoo) numerous times. Based on my observations, the ‘pandas’ could easily be replaced with large cheap floppy stuffed animals that the zoo keepers throw into the pens before the zoo opens in the morning, and the crowd would still be 6 people deep around them as people took photos of them ‘sleeping’ on rocks. It kinda makes me want to open a zoo made entirely out of ‘sleeping’ stuffed animals and see how long it takes people to notice.

        • 1 TICKET PLEASE

  19. All I can imagine is Gabe desperately checking his email waiting for the “Topher Grace” Google Alert to appear in his inbox.

    • perhaps we should take it as a Monster challenge to get out there into the intertubes and get people talking about/making very bad photoshopped pictures of Topher Grace. It’s not like these posts just write themselves, after all!

  20. I’ll take one “Fuck you and Fuck your live journal” t-shirt please.

  21. More like “Gopher Trace!”

  22. In fairness Huang (or Zhixian, or both (probably none)) you have been doing your research. Nerdy girls is definitely barking up the right demographic. I wish you a happy market research.

  23. This makes my grandma’s Sears Roebuck catalogs feel really old.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post, reply to, or rate a comment.